Springtime For Chrump

Tick Tock

Seven 'Til Midnight
January 30, 2017

Team Chrump purged the State Department of all top-level, non-partisan career employees. Many very smart people are saying that replacing a group like this is all but impossible, that is, if one is interested in maintaining the level of quality and experience already in place. One very stupid person thinks the purge is a terrific idea and is poised to replace everyone with Stephen Bannon. May God have mercy on our souls…though we deserve it not.

Ask Not For Whom The Clock Ticks

Lawrence Krauss, colleague and visual aid

 

The fascistic purge at the State Department happened after the Doomsday Clock had already been moved, according to Lawrence Krauss of the Bulletin of the Atomic Scientists, closer to midnight than it has been since 1953 – right after the Soviet Union exploded its first hydrogen bomb – ushering in the modern arms race. The whole world is scared out of their wits now that history’s biggest and baddest nuclear arsenal is in the tiny hands of an unshackled nutcase. Naturally, the unshackled nutcase’s minions are up in arms (pun unavoidable), shrieking that Krauss, who is obviously a dreaded scientist – a theoretical physicist in fact – is nothing more than a fear mongering Chrump-hater, and should be ignored in favor of more preferable alternative science.

 

Ann Frankly My Dear, He Don't Give a Damn

Executive director of the Anne Frank Center for Mutual Respect Steven Goldstein responded to Chrump’s deplorable executive orders regarding immigration and the Mexico border wall, calling it “one of the most hateful days in our nation’s history.” Goldstein wrote in a statement on Facebook. “The Statue of Liberty weeps over President Trump’s discrimination. President Trump is beyond the wrong side of history. He is driving our nation off a moral cliff.”

Paying Attention alternative reporter Ho Lee Shitte uncovered Chrump’s next edict and it relates directly to the Statue of Liberty: Chrump has drafted a new phrase to replace as he put it the “bigly outdated Emma Lazarus – whoever the hell she is – nonsense, and by the way the statue will be renamed The Water Broad…get it?” (alternative actual quote):

“Give me your white, your well-heeled,
Your wealthy white masses yearning to take more,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore?
Keep these, the homeless, tempest-tossed, to yourself,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door,
And I can see what you look like!
So don’t try any funny stuff or you’ll be out of here so fast
It will make your head spin.
In fact stay the hell away from here.
You’re disgusting.”

On January 27, 2017 – Holocaust Remembrance Day – Chrump offered up the traditional president’s message commemorating the liberation of the Nazi concentration camps. Breaking with tradition, common sense and any absence of anti-Semitism, this president failed to include any mention of Jews. On this same day Chrump issued another incredibly beautiful amazing record-breaking Executive Order banning all refugee admissions for 120 days and Syrian refugees indefinitely. This callous, tone-deaf, poorly-thought-out ban, which excluded all the countries from which the 9-11 hijackers hailed, did include two Syrian families that a Massachusetts synagogue was poised to sponsor for U.S. citizenship. Daniel W. Drezner, professor of international politics at Tufts University and member of the synagogue in question, responded thusly:

Drezner quickly and publicly apologized for his impetuous use of foul language, but remains incensed by Chrump’s ignorant and likely dangerous policy decisions. Drezner is not the only foreign policy expert who believes that Chrump’s behavior inspires groups like ISIS to do us harm.

That being said, I have to agree that it is probably inappropriate to say, “Fuck you Chrump.” It is current policy at this blog to not say, “Fuck you Chrump,” though this policy is subject to change depending on how things pan out. As it stands we do not condone the use of the phrase “Fuck you Chrump.” And whether in the comments section or in personal communication with any staff at Paying Attention we ask that you respect our strict no “Fuck you Chrump” policy, at least until further notice. Tremendous thought and Herculean restraint have gone into this editorial decision. We will stand by our decision and are comfortable with avoiding anyone breaching our stringent “Fuck you Chrump” ban.*

As always, everything here at Paying Attention is absolute fact…or barring that alternative fact. Does anyone actually think there is a difference now that we are on Chrump time?

Look familiar?

I. Mangrey reporting. We are the majority. Be not silent.

                                                                                                    Mad in USA 

* Screw it, consider this further notice. To wit, Fuck you Chrump.

The Alternative Alternative

Washington, We Have a Problem

Lost in Place
January 28, 2017

I have been very hard on presIDent Chrump lo these many months since first he oozed onto the scene as a political force/farce. Now though it pains me greatly, I must give the man some credit. He has been in office for an entire week now and we are not all dead. This will go down as the greatest achievement of his doomed administration. Still, I eagerly await our new president paying a visit to Dallas, and driving past a book depository or perhaps a grassy knoll or two.

Upside Meet Down

We are through the looking glass and the looking glass is through. Kaput. We will be lucky if we ever find our way back from Chrump’s alt-reality. Since at least the 1960s the Left has been harping on the dark side of the CIA. The CIA has been implicated – at least – in meddling with governments across the globe, from Chile to Iran, from Venezuela to Vietnam, the list goes on. CIA has been instrumental in propping up all manner of brutal nut-job dictators. Watchdog and whistleblower patriots were mocked by everyone on the Right at every turn. How dare we question American intelligence (now one of the oxy-est-of-morons). How dare we accuse the CIA of improper behavior. Now Chrump is attacking the intelligence community the same way he treats global climate change. Anything that does not emanate from the fetid swirling winds blowing unobstructed within the recess between his orange ears is simply not to be trusted. He knows more about every subject than the experts. You name it he knows it. At least within the context of his own personal reality.

Topsy, Meet Turvy

More recently the Left’s applause for operations like Julian Assange’s Wikileaks for exposing government misbehaviors was vehemently condemned by the Right as anti-American. Now Hair Chrump, who in 2010 said of Wikileaks "I think it's disgraceful, I think there should be like death penalty or something," now says “Wikileaks, I love Wikileaks”, Sean Hannity who whined about Obama not putting a stop to Assange’s leaks today beams "I believe everything he says", Sarah Palin who called Assange an “anti-American operative with blood on his hands” and many who ridiculed those who sympathized with Julian Assange are elevating Assange as a hero and a truth-teller after Assange did yeoman work aiding and abetting Putin’s now successful efforts to damage Hillary Clinton’s campaign and support the election of Chrump. Maybe they were right about Assange.

I Love it When You Talk Vote-y

One of the latest objects of Chrump’s afflictions is voter fraud (it is simply impossible to keep up with this sociopathic hairball) – the non-existent crime of illegally casting votes. This dangerous threat to our democracy has been found to occur approximately .0009% of the time. While there are considerably more cases of faulty voter registration, the actual casting of illegal votes, nothing to speak of unless you Don Chrump. Funny story though – Steve Bannon, Sean Spicer, Jared Kushner and Tiffany Chrump all are registered to vote in more than one state. There is no actual evidence that any of these ne’er-do-wells voted in more than one state, but Paying Attention has uncovered incontrovertible alternative evidence of just that. We have it on very good – the best in fact – alternative authority that all of these individuals, and in alternative fact, many millions – trust us on this – many millions of Chrump voters voted illegally.

Chrump lost the popular vote by three million, so he figures that there must have been three million illegal votes cast. Makes sense to someone who insists that any news that is contrary to his beliefs is fake news, that any votes for his opponents must be fake votes. It is only in a futile effort to appear reasonable that he is not saying that seventy million illegal votes were cast.

This pathetic little man, who still has not gotten over the lack of an Emmy, which he blamed on…rigged voting, cannot and will not let go of the actual fact that the crowd at his inaugural was smaller than his hands…or his whatever. He assaulted the CIA with his mewling, he dragged an ABC interviewer over to a specially prepared photo of his big day – framed, and complete with an authentic Chrump tweet.

Notice how the picture is cut off right at the point where Chrump’s tiny crowd peters out.

Also notice the wrong date. I guess the stupid is contagious.  

Remember when he said of Obama (remember him?), "Why doesn't he show his birth certificate? There's something on that birth certificate that he doesn't like"? It was March 23, 2011. Why doesn’t Chrump show his taxes? There’s something on those taxes that he doesn’t like. Remember when Chrump said of the birth certificate, "We're looking into it very, very strongly. At a certain point in time I'll be revealing some interesting things"? It was April 21, 2011. Now he is looking into voter fraud very strongly and claims he will be revealing some interesting things. At a certain point in time. Right after we see Obama’s alternative birth certificate and Chrump’s actual tax returns.

And by the way, when do we get to hear his “very beautiful” “foolproof” plan to eliminate ISIS “very quickly”?

I. Mangrey reporting. My stomach is pounding and my head is in knots.

                                                                                                         Mad in USA

Occupy Chrump

Chrump Goes the Weasel…or is it the Other Way Around?

Alternative Chrump World
January 27, 2017

It is very possible that we can keep the Orange Gas Cloud distracted by annoying him as much as possible. He cannot resist responding to any perceived slight, every time he is called out for lying like the woven rug on his head or circumventing every shred of human decency. Despite him telling a Fakes News blonde, "Yeah, look, I don't like tweeting. I have other things I could be doing, but I get very dishonest media, very dishonest press and it's my only way that I can counter act," it is likely that even he does not believe that for a second…alt-reality or not. Keep the Idiot Bastard presIDent occupied tweeting. Call your congress critters and senators. Do not give them any rest. Keep raising hell – he thinks protesting is “UNFAIR.” Bury the White House and Congress in calls, postcards and letters. We want to see this on live TV:

Keep those cards and letters and phone calls coming

Greenpeace doing their part as always,
hanging this banner outside of Chrump’s Our House

Making Chrump’s head explode (This is just an expression; I have no intention of trying to actually make his head explode Mr. Comey) will be no easy task. Chrump does not think that millions of protesters across the globe, including half a million (three times more than attended his inauguration the day before) right outside his new ill begotten front door, the day after he was sworn in and at as president-the-vast-majority-of-American-voters-voted-against, were protesting against him. According to depress secretary Sean Spicer, Hair Chrump is "cognizant to the fact that a lot of these people were there to protest an issue of concern to them and not against anything." What the fuck does that even mean? We are going to have to ramp things up considerably to break through the Fog of Stupid surrounding Chrump and his wraiths. Spicer condemned the media's treatment of his self-loathing boss as "demoralizing". How could anyone even think of harassing a president? What kind of monster would cause Chrump to feel that his dumb ass is not being kissed sufficiently for him to “enjoy” being president. To that I say: We are just getting started sphincter-face. Or should I say President Sphincter-face. No, I should not.

Let us not forget that our Crybaby-in-chief went kvetching to the CIA, who he previously compared to Nazi Germany and whined to them about the press lying about the size of his hands penis crowd.

That’s right, after trashing the CIA for “leaking” fake news to the public, Chrump went right into their house (with human laugh/applause track in tow) inundated them with his own fake news, including his insane nonsense about crowd size, which is probably lower on the CIA’s list of important things to think about than figuring out Where’s Waldo. He also blamed the media for the bad blood that exists between His Hairness and the intelligence community. I refer you to the tweet above, not written by the media. Chrump told the assembled audience and his lackeys that the media “are among the most dishonest human beings on Earth. And they made it sound like I had a feeuuuuuuud with the intelligence community.” Again, I refer you to the tweet above. Chrump could not resist advocating for the commission of war crimes, putting our troops at risk in Iraq, and tossing in his favorite oldie-but-goodie, “Trust me, I’m like a smart person.” At least after he was finished fucking them he said, “I love you.” Yes, he did that.

Size matters.

Bad Intelligence

I hear this constantly from Chrump World – they do not trust the intelligence community because they got the whole Iraq thing all wrong and we never should have invaded Iraq. It is exceedingly rare to have anyone in the media correct this nonsense. When someone says that it was bad intelligence that got us into the Iraq war you can say one of two things: 1) yes it was bad intelligence – George W. Bush and Dick Cheney and Don Rumsfeld were badly intelligent (much nicer than calling them stupid or liars, don’t you think) or 2) the only bad intelligence was the super secret fake “CIA” that Dick Cheney cobbled together because the real CIA was not telling him what he wanted to hear. The actual intelligence community did not provide probable cause to illegally invade Iraq in 2003. That was all Cheney and Rumsfeld; George was just doing what he was told, him being badly intelligent and all. The man known as Bush’s Brain gave us this gem back in the Zeros:

"That's not the way the world really works anymore. We're an empire now, and when we act, we create our own reality. And while you're studying that reality—judiciously, as you will—we'll act again, creating other new realities, which you can study too, and that's how things will sort out. We're history's actors…and you, all of you, will be left to just study what we do."
                  Karl Rove – the kinder, gentler Stephen Bannon.

While we are on the subject of bad intelligence, let us hope that one day the media will grow tired of being useless stenographers – not to be confused with useful stenographers, who are paid to do actual stenography. Maybe one day they will act like reporters whose job it is to dig for stories and ask tough questions, and call out lies from those in power in order to educate and protect the public. The real bad intelligence today is that occupying the void between Chrump’s ears.

I. Mangrey reporting.

                                                                                                  Mad in USA 

It is Not Hyperbole If it is Incontrovertibly Insane

Did We Nazi This Coming?

The Hollowed Out Shell That Once Was America
January 25, 2017

New presidencies are often discussed in terms of the first 100 days. Chrump’s first 100 days could very well be our last 100 days. During his inauguration abscess The Don said, “This American carnage stops right here and stops right now.” I have it on good authority that immediately after that he muttered, “I have a much better carnage prepared. This will be the best carnage you’ve ever seen. The best. Nobody knows carnage like Donald Chrump.”

Chrump told the Washington Post, “Being a great president has to do with a lot of things, but one of them is being a great cheerleader for the country. And we’re going to show the people as we build up our military, we’re going to display our military." I must admit to owning up to being very much highly impressed with this impressively impressive move by the new monarch.  Finally Amerika will join the ranks of other great nations of the world like North Korea, Iran, China, the Soviet Union and who could forget Chrump’s most coveted role model – Nazi Germany. All these countries know (or knew) how to show off their military might by uselessly parading their military in public. This, as it turns out, is a terrific way to intimidate your detractors at home while simultaneously waving the tiny pecker you believe to be really huge at the entire world. I cannot wait to be proud, arrogant and pathetic like Il Chrumpe. I can feel the greatness washing all over me already – like an endless golden shower of pride. Do these uniforms highlight my eyes? Does this long-range nuclear missile make me look fat?

This could will be us…any minute now

Rather than lead by example Chrump prefers following in the footsteps of dictators, douchebags and dimwits. Birds of a feather I suppose. Who among us has not wished to see our already bloated military budget put to such good use. I have not felt this great in a long time, probably never. I do not think I will be able to stand all this greatness much longer. Any suggestions?

But Seriously Folks…

We have already crossed the Rubicon. I thought I had imagined and braced myself for the worst. I was wrong. Sad! I thought alternative facts were a bridge too far. Chrump’s press secretary, Sean Spicer – who purportedly chews and swallows 35 sticks of gum every day for breakfast – repeatedly answered questions about Chrump’s delusional rantings on countless topics by referring to the fact that his boss believes whatever it is to be true. And that is all that matters in alt-reality. To paraphrase our previous paranoid, narcissist POTUS, Dick Nixon, “If the president believes it, then it is true.” Unfortunately Boss Chrump was not satisfied because Spicer was not “forceful enough” in selling Chrump’s bullshit or beating up on the press. I think Der Furor should carry his own water. Tweet baby tweet.

What will they think of next? I’ll tell you what – gag orders on the Departments of Transportation, Interior, Health and Human Services, the National Parks Service, USDA’s Agriculture Research Service, of and the Environmental Protection Agency. None of these agencies are currently permitted to communicate the work they are charged with doing for the American people with the American people. We are all Bobby Seale now.

Chrump has frozen all EPA grants and contracts, effectively paralyzing the agency – just as he did on inauguration night by choking off finances to the Affordable Care Act. The new Justice Department demanded a one-month delay of a hearing scheduled for Tuesday on Texas’s voter-identification law – they might not want to interfere with Texas’s ability to continue their voter suppression efforts. The U.S. Court of Appeals for the 5th Circuit ruled last year that the law had a discriminatory effect that needed to be rectified. More than 200 people subjected to mass-arrested at the Washington, D.C. protests against the inauguration of Donald Trump. Legal observers and journalists – had their phones, cameras and other personal belongings confiscated as evidence and are among those now facing facing felony riot charges punishable by up to 10 years in prison. Hair Chrump has also resurrected the Keystone and Dakota Access Piplelines. Good night Earth.

This was the day after the election. Those were the good old days.

I. Mangrey and Ho Lee Shitte reporting. Bend over America.

                                                                                                          Mad in USA

Chrumpier Than Thou

El Chrumpo Extradited to White House Against Wishes of Most Americans

January 24, 2017

I cannot recall either hearing or hearing of an American president issuing a “decree.” That is precisely what I heard from the 45^th president the other day. Hair Chrump issued a decree. He used that word. It was childish and meaningless, and he probably does not know what a decree is, but a decree it was. He thinks he is the king. Making decrees. Other than his (first?) decree, his administration is off to a running start: making affordable housing less affordable, erring on the side of voter suppression in Texas, scrubbing the White House website of any mention of climate change, civil rights and healthcare, mortally wounding the Affordable Care Act. Now Der Furor has closed the White House switchboard comments line. A man of the people. Just not any people you know. Chrump retroactively issued a proclamation declaring January 20, 2017 a National Day of Patriotic Devotion because, "A new national pride [It is easy to understand how Chrump would mistake panic for pride.] stirs the American soul and inspires the American heart. We are one people, [Wrong] united by a common destiny and a shared purpose." Wrong. SAD!

Do Not Forget the Cabinet of Doom

While J. Beauregard Sessions was hiding under a table somewhere to avoid facing John Lewis’s testimony against Sessions’ appointment as Contemptable Attorney General another hearing was going on for Contemptable Secretary of State. One of the wealthiest and arguably the most heinous corporations on the planet – the folks who brought you severely doctored research on global climate change back in the 1970s, the folks who brought you Valdez, Alaska (did you think we forgot that you filthy murdering bastards?) – whose CEO has been tapped by Chrump as Secretary of State, under whose leadership his company violated trade embargos with Iran (did I say IRAN? (yes I believe I did)), and which owns almost five times more oil-soaked real estate in Russia than it does in the United States (remember the United States?) but cannot drill any oil on thanks to sanctions, is poised to have its CEO become the one person in the United States who can, ensure these sanctions are rescinded? That company is Exxon and its shameless Putin-loving, Earth-killing CEO is Rex Tillerson, whose sole purpose in life since he was 23 years old was the addition of commas and zeros to his beloved company’s (and his own) bottom line to exclusion of any other earthly consideration. I am as certain as I can be regarding this man’s allegiances as he commits perjury regarding Exxon’s provable lobbying of Congress during the hearing to approve his nomination. After all, he is the CEO of the company, what possible motivation could he have to use the second most powerful position in the “government” to help Exxon at the expense of nation? 

Nobody has to tell Americans to go f*#k themselves…we did it voluntarily

How many billionaires can dance on the heads of the poor?

Chrump crowed about having a cabinet with “by far the highest IQ of any Cabinet ever assembled.” Naturally Chrump has no idea what the IQ scores of his or any other cabinet ever assembled might or might not be. It is likely that Chrump equates dollars with IQ points. He probably does have the wealthiest cabinet ever dissembled. Combined (there are 17 of them) they have greater wealth than one third of actual everyday Americans, you know the kind of people that voted for Chrump because he was just plain folk, fighting for the little guy and draining the swamp. Did you not get the memo? Chrump like any good fascist, tries to hide behind claims he is a man of the people. He does not know any people. Spending all of his time with his family and other sycophants, Chrump would not know actual people if they bit him the leg.

The Chrump administration looks to be flush with billionaires - with or without an IQ. After all, who understands the needs and feelings of the average Joe better than those who have spent years stepping on, over and past him with nary a glance?

Steven Mnuchin (Goldman Sachs) Net Worth: At least $166 million and as much as $500 million

Secretary of Commerce: Wilbur Ross Jr. Net Worth: around $2.5 billion

Secretary of Labor: Andrew Puzder (fast food CEO)Net Worth: $45 million

Secretary of State: Rex Tillerson (EXXON CEO) Net Worth: $325 million, including $240 million in Exxon stock.

Secretary of Education: Betsy DeVos (heiress) Net Worth: $1.25 billion, with family wealth adding up to $3.85 billion more. She’s currently a member of three yacht clubs, three golf clubs, and one “premier private business and social club.”

Chrump’s cabinet so far – there are still two openings – is worth an estimated $4.5 billion, 60% higher than the combined wealth of Barack Obama’s current cabinet. Democracy Now estimates Chrump’s cabinet’s worth at $11 billion.

Chrump himself claims to be a billionaire. There is absolutely no proof of this. Given his propensity (to say the least) deal in alternative facts we can be certain he is using his own special facts. And you can’t have them. No facts for you!

Fun Non-Alternative Fact: Despite Chrump’s constant slamming of his opponents for palling around with Goldman Sachs, and now much to no one's surprise, he has five people from Goldman Sachs in high places in his administration.

Take that swamp!

I. Mangrey reporting.

                                                                                                          Mad in USA

Chrump Gets Chrumpier and Chrumpier

The Screeching Wheel Gets the Tweets

WTFFville
January 22, 2017

Spotted, then deleted from Chrump’s Twitter account.
Get out the spelling salts. What a maroon.

 

Chrump sure knows how to give a screech. At smaller venues he now brings a live applause track with him – an unknown number of lackeys who cheer, laugh and applaud at pre-arranged times. Once a reality show douche, always a reality show douche. For his inauguration, Chrump’s artificial coloring was as close to human as ever; his “hair” was glued into the best and squarest arrangement we have seen to date. After swearing to “preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.” He has no idea what any of those words mean, and cares even less. He is only hoping that another Chrump supporter continues to be born every minute. After all the swearing in, at and off, Chrump briefly addressed a tiny crowd (a crowd that would be dwarfed the following day by women and the people who support them protesting the onset of the Chrump presIDency) and a fearful nation and world. He was, as expected, angry, depressingly dark and unhinged. Der Furor thanked “the world” for his election “victory”. Does he think that the whole world gets to vote for the president of the United States? Does he also think that they all voted for him? It is more likely that he thinks he is now king of the world.

Spongedon Square Hair hates on America at his in-aggravation screech

Orwell That Ends Well

If there is anyone who is slimier and more factually challenged than Chrump himself it is Kellyanne Conway. I have to disinfect myself every time I see her on the television. The day after the Worst Inauguration Ever, Chrump’s press secretary Sean Spicer, dressed like a homeless person and struggling to read his own statement, opened his first press briefing with an asinine assault on the media. The subject could not have been more critical to the future of our once-great-and-waiting-desperately-to-be-great-again nation. Spicer was apoplectic over the perceived misreporting of the crowd size at Chrump’s inauguration. What is it with these Chrumpers and size? Spicer excreted a spate of lies including, “This was the largest audience ever to witness an inauguration, period.” It was not. NOT. EVEN. CLOSE. Kellyanne Conway, after categorizing Chrump’s hysterical American Carnage speech as “beautiful and elegant," defended Spicer by saying he was simply presenting "alternative facts" (emphasis mine – fortunately you cannot see just how loud my emphasis is). And so it begins. Alt-reality begets alternative facts, begets the death of a nation. For the record, the 2017 inauguration was 18% smaller than Obama’s 2009 swearing in. George Orwell never dreamed of freaks like these people.

No. They are not. Why do you ask? Are you on drugs?
 



Fun Fact: 18% is the same percentage by which Chrump’s hands (and his whatever) are smaller than those of a normal person. Sad!

Everything You Never Wanted to Know About Chrump’s Speeches During His Time in Awful Office But Were Too Smart to Ask

You know what they say about death and taxes. At this moment in history I would unreservedly welcome death and/or taxes, but for the time being another more pressing inevitability will be the inescapable necessity of hearing presIDent Chrump speak publicly about important issues. B.N. Formd uncovered a super secret actual document. Not one of those thousand blank pages Hair Chrump paraded briefly before classifying as critical for national security – like his tax returns, which are being eternally “audited”. For those of you who wisely prefer to avoid such unpleasantness, we present:

Chrump’s Speech Template

I am great. I will share my greatness with America. I will save America. Me. Make America great again. …the best. Lie about something meaningful. Lie about something meaningless. Whine. Lie. Something that doesn’t make much sense. (think about “hair”) Meaningless statement on policy issue. Repeat meaningless statement on policy issue. Childish slogan. Repeat childish slogan (if people cheer). Misuse common word. Me. Insult Hillary Clinton. Insult majority of Americans. Me. America is a disaster area. Platitude. Make America great again. Repeat platitude. (think about “hair”) Attack reporter. Continue attacking reporter and media in general. Lie. Whine. (think about “hair”) Lie. Misuse common term. Nobody wants to see my tax returns, which as you know are under audit. Different lie. Me. Whine. Pathetic slogan. Repeat pathetic slogan. Re-repeat pathetic slogan. Me. Inane phrase. Repeat inane phrase. Meaningless statement on policy issue. Repeat random words. Lie. Me. Lie.

You should also know…

Every president carries with him at all times something known as “The Biscuit.” The Biscuit is a card bearing the verification codes that launch nuclear weapons. You can probably guess who has it now. I hope the Idiot Bastard presIDent can distinguish The Biscuit from The Twitter. Neither history nor Chrump is on our side.

I. Mangrey reporting. Duck and cover.

                                                                                                          Mad in USA

Here it is, your moment of W…

Cheney tries to suffocate George W. Bush with a poncho
that looks like it might finish the job the pretzel could not.

Marching Like We Mean It...We Do

Unlike Phil Ochs, We Are A Marching Anymore

January 21, 2017

Just a quick word. I and I were down at the Women’s March in Philly earlier today. The crowd was more than double what was expected – as was the one in DC. Official estimates were 50,000 in Philly and 500,000 in DC. Both crowds were bigger than the crowd who showed up to hear Chrump get inaugurated and then deliver his already infamous “Carnage in Amerika” speech. If you have not heard it consider yourself lucky.

Out with the folks at Philly Women’s March

 

This is What Democracy Looks Like 

Shot of Philly crowd - Great Sign

 



Wider shot of Philly crowd

The crowd in DC

If like all of us here at Paying Attention you avoided being exposed to any of the enhanced inauguration techniques, you might want to see a few poignant and priceless shots of Michelle Obama in her valiant attempt to survive the event. She wore the expressions of the majority of Americans and countless people across the globe. Can you imagine – one of our nation’s most amazing and well-loved women – sitting through that? There are not enough words to express what her expressions say so very clearly.

 Michelle makes the face of a bad situation

Take note all ye in Congress and all the rest of you Swamp dwellers. We’re here, we’re in gear and you’re gonna hear.

The late great Phil Ochs

We are the majority. March every day in your own way.

Ed Venture

Inauguration Daze

I’m in a New Jerk State of Mind

January 20, 2017 – The First Day of the Last Throes of Your Life

I was out for my morning constitutional (nothing will ever be constitutional again I fear) and was pleasantly surprised to see there is still breathable air, and one would assume - somewhere behind the gathering clouds - the Sun. I will not assume the same come tomorrow, but or the moment I will remain hopeful. I have never tried writing while in a cold sweat, convulsing, with my head buried under the covers, but that is probably how I will be spending my day (if not the next four years) so here goes nothing. And nothing going sounds like a damn good idea right about now.

Heeeere’s Donny

Starting at one past noon today we will finally get to see just what-the-hell-we’ve-got-to-lose. For the majority of us it will be the ability to sleep or keep our food down. For many millions of us it will be health care and you know…the ability to be alive. For fewer millions of us it will be our freedom, our homes and/or families. For a sizeable minority it will be the ability to look at ourselves in the mirror because we voted for the most ignorant, incompetent, hateful, vengeful, narcissistic douchebag ever to dis-grace our nation’s highest office. The good news is that the shitstorm will not begin exactly at one past noon because as Der Furor told the Times of London, “… [D]ay one – which I will consider to be Monday as opposed to Friday or Saturday. Right? I mean my day one is going to be Monday because I don’t want to be signing and get it mixed up with lots of celebration.”(actual quote) Hang on to your whatevers folks, I expect a good bit of turbulence before we land. Make sure you know where your hair-sick bag is and as always be sure your Orange-gas mask is in place before you try to help anyone else put on theirs. Fortunately I managed to finish the piece below yesterday before total paralysis set in…

Press to Open

January 19, 2017

Chrump’s recent press conference tantrum showed off his unique (i.e., fascist) ability to intimidate the press. Don’t get me wrong, corporate media has been disgraceful in their coverage of Chrump throughout the campaign era. They let him get away with everything short of murder – Chrump, after all, only threatened murder (as far as we know). It remains critical to the very fabric of democracy that a free and independent press do the people’s work and call out the establishment when it flies in the face of the people’s best interests. Such behavior is already rampant as Chrump prepares to take our government as his own in order to demolish life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

During his first real press availability in almost six months. The Orange Gas Cloud shouted down a CNN reporter trying to ask a question, calling CNN fake news and refusing to let the reporter speak. The man with the fake hair, fake skin coloring, fake populism, fake wealth that he is putting into a fake blind trust, perpetual fake outrage, fake election victory, the man who is fake news personified, is all bent out of shape over any fake news that dare not emanate from his mouth, thumbs or wrong end of the feeding tube, or from his spokesmutants.

You’re a loser! And you’re a loser! You’re all losers! Sad!
I want all of you dishonest medias out of here now!

Chrump paraded out his lawyer to ‘splain how the very-well-sighted trust will work as the new Con-artist-in-chief divests the American public of any right to question His Hairiness and his business dealings. The attorney works for a prestigious law firm – the best law firm ever – Morgan, Lewis & Bockius – won the 2016 “Russia Law Firm of the Year” award. This is not fake news. Chrump is fake news. Real fake news. Or the new fake real.

Self portrait, painted by someone else

The prop du jour for this farce was an absurdly conspicuous pile of what to the low-IQ viewer appeared to be file folders. Reporters were not allowed to inspect the documents, which appeared to all present to be empty (like Chrump himself) and in mint condition (completely unlike Chrump).

Rene Magritte’s Fake Man with Fake Folders

Beyond Breaking

Broken News

It will be interesting to see if corporate media will continue to let Chrump crap all over it. Maybe reporters will decide that they might as well do their damn jobs. Chrump already hates their guts and nothing short of them going Full Conway and sugar coating every single vowel movement, blatant lie and dastardly deed will keep Chrump from treating the media like something he stepped in while fixing his “hair” on a windy day.

Naturally, Republican’ts believe the federal government is nothing more than a nuisance that interferes with corporate profits, while helping people who do not deserve help. They think much less of journalists, especially those who insist on fact finding and challenging the powerful as they attempt to run roughshod over the hoi polloi. In reality the façade of governments and nations is wearing thinner and thinner and has significantly less chance of survival as we move further into Alt-reality. This type of thinking is not new. It came up in the great 1976 Paddy Chayefsky movie Network. Although it’s been said many times, many ways...

The forces of nature do not stand a chance

Lest we imagine that this distaste for the press belongs solely to The Chrump, Paul Ryan wants to outlaw the First Amendment from Congress. Our founders obviously never intended the public to be privy to what they were doing. No photos or videos allowed on the House Floor since no photos or videos were allowed in 1776. Ayn Rand would be proud. George Washington’s teeth would burst into flames.

Donald Tinyhands cannot cope with a free and independent press – including what passes for such here in Amerika. As much as the press was the K-Y Jelly that eased Chrump’s penetration into the White House, they are still not submissive enough to placate his unquenchable thirst for attention and subservience. Unless they bow, scrape and massage his ever-wounded bloated ego, he will not be mollified. No one dare question the great and powerful Don. There is a plan afoot to banish the press from the White House press briefing room. They are to be moved off-site. Chrump referred to the press as, “among the most dishonest people in the world.” He harassed them, he threatened them, he caused his minions to verbally assault them to the point where one female reporter required armed protection lest the verbal assaults morphed into physical violence. Frank Zappa ironically, warningly told us many years ago, “It can’t happen here.” It is happening. Here. Now.

As always every word he utters is actually about himself

I. Mangrey reporting. Resist and replace.
If you see something, do something.
                                                                                                    Mad in USA

And now, how about a moment of Zen…

Charles Mingus - Free Cell Block F, 'Tis Nazi U.S.A.