Scorn In The USA

Of Trump And Men

March 25, 2026

Many years ago, my father had an episode that landed him in the ER. He was evaluated for a stroke because he was confused and couldn’t remember basic facts like the names of his three sons or the name of the current president. My mom was told he did not have a stroke but did have transient global amnesia (I remember telling her “That means he temporarily forgot stuff.”). Things almost immediately returned to normal. He was around 60 at the time. Needless to say, my dad was not president of the United States at the time…or any other time for that matter. I think I would have known. Unless I had transient global amnesia.

Speaking Of Episodes Of Possible Brain Damage…

During a recent press event in the Awful Office, amongst many other very worrisome moments, like coveting and hugging a replica of a B-2 Bomber, Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump entered his famous “weave” (not the one atop his vacuous noggin) and began, for no apparent reason, to talk about California Governor Gavin Newsom. Trump referred to Newsom as the “president of the United States”.

“The president of the United States, Gavin Newscum, admitted that he has learning disabilities, dyslexia. Everything about him is dumb. I’m all for people with learning disabilities, but not for my president.”
                          Donald Trump, March 20, 2026

Also during this “episode” Trump claimed to have spoken with an “ex-president” (which, by all accounts turned out to be himself) who regretted not bombing Iran. All four living ex-presidents (except for one who apparently could not be reached for coherent comment) denied any such conversation ever took place. 

Three days later, Trump claimed on Truth Social – naturally, in all caps – that

“VERY GOOD AND PRODUCTIVE CONVERSATIONS REGARDING A COMPLETE AND TOTAL RESOLUTION OF OUR HOSTILITIES IN THE MIDDLE EAST. I HAVE INSTRUCTED THE DEPARTMENT OF WAR TO POSTPONE ANY AND ALL MILITARY STRIKES AGAINST IRANIAN POWER PLANTS AND ENERGY INFRASTRUCTURE FOR A FIVE DAY PERIOD.”

Trump may have also said

Big strong man came up to me, tears in his eyes, some kind of Ayatollah or something. I think he was the manager. He says hey, let’s talk. Maybe I can surrender. I can sell you oil, real cheap and you can maybe be the president of Iran or something. Whatever works for you. I told him I would think it over and postpone doing war crimes on him if I can build a casino/golf course in Tehran. One like nobody’s ever seen before. We’re going to make an excellent deal for Trump…oh, and America too. Maybe.

That might not be a direct quote.

Iranian officials reported that no such conversations ever took place.

“No negotiations have been held with the US, and fake news is used to manipulate the financial and oil markets and escape the quagmire in which the U.S. and Israel are trapped.”
                         MB Ghalibaf, Iran's parliament speaker

Oops.

One can only assume that, once again, Trump was talking to himself.

Given that 1) Trump has at best zero credibility on any given issue, 2) Trump cares more about oil prices and Wall Street than he does about Americans – civilians and military, and 3) Trump consistently sides with Russia more than U.S. intelligence, we should be more inclined, horrible as they may be, to believe Iranian officials than Trump.

Also, Trump’s brain is mush. Someone needs to take him to a nice secluded place and tell him about the rabbits.

Look Donnie, I think I see gold out there.

I might be going out on a limb here, but I’m starting to get the feeling that Donald Trump just might be a sociopathic, criminal, braindead, fucking asshole like nobody's ever seen before.

I. Mangrey reporting. No way to delay that trouble coming every day.

                                                                                       

Public Service Announcement – NO KINGS 3.0

Marching In March

March 24, 2026

More

Donald Trump Memorial EPSTEIN FILES^*

No kings.

Speaking of which…

 

Hopefully you will have the time and wherewithal to attend one of the more than 3000 NO KINGS 3.0 events next Saturday, March 28^th. We’ll be hopping on a train to attend the march/rally starting out at City Hall in Philadelphia – the home of the building with the room where it happened.

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*Man, whatever is in those files must really be bad for Darn Old Trump, because his flailing monkeys are really working their little tails off trying to figure out how to protect him from letting the public in on it.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Public Service Announcement.

Headline Of The Day – Offward and Upward

To Infinity!

March 24, 2026

Do you remember how much gas cost the year you turned 16?

I turned 16 in 1971. I guessed $0.50/gal.

According to the article…

1971

- Absolute gas price: $0.37

- Inflation-adjusted price: $2.49 (#22 least expensive year in 85-year span)

Gas prices climbed in 1971, as did taxes, due to inflation and general economic instability. The situation became so dire that President Richard Nixon issued a 90-day freeze on all prices and wages in the nation. He demanded that everyone, from the individual to the corporation, cooperate voluntarily. The freeze brought about mixed reactions, and though it did initially inject some much-needed life back into the stock market, the success was short-lived.

My father bought me a 1966 Corvair in 1973.

I kept a copy of Ralph Nader’s Unsafe at Any Speed in the passenger seat.

Again, according to the article…

1973

- Absolute gas price: $0.41

- Inflation-adjusted price: $2.52 (#23 least expensive year in 85-year span)

The most famous historic event to do with gasoline and gas prices, the 1973 oil crisis began when the members of OPEC declared an embargo against nations that had supported, or appeared to support, Israel during the Arab-Israeli war earlier that year. This embargo meant that the United States, which had become extremely reliant on foreign oil, suddenly faced gasoline shortages. In response, gas prices soared, and lines at gas stations got longer. The impact of this crisis ultimately stretched far beyond availability; in fact, the crisis shifted the balance of global politics and forced America to take a position in the Middle East in order to end the embargo.

According to today’s experts…

The 1973 oil crisis was the worst in history…until today. Death-To-America Don’s stupid, illegal and incredibly doomed attack on Iran has caused the worst disruption to oil supplies in history. What, according to one expert, “is not an oil crisis. This is the worst energy crisis we have ever seen.” Totally avoidable, self-inflicted and likely to last the better part of a year. At best.

According to me…

This fucking asshole, as noted by a French general, “shot himself in the foot”. And he shot us in the ass. And he is planning to shoot us in the face. Then and only then will he surrender and claim victory. Because Trump has only one setting:

stupidarrogantinsaneviolent

 
Death-To-America Don surrenders to insanely high gas prices
 that he caused, and incessant death threats from MAGA

This has been your Paying Attention™ Headline Of The Day.
Do with it what you will.

Thankfully, not one single mention of the

Donald Trump Memorial Epstein Files

You’re welcome.

Not The Epstein Files

Why, I’ve Never Been So Consulted In All My Life

March 23, 2026

Trump was surprised that our allies were upset with him not consulting them before setting the world on fire – literally – by his unprovoked attack on Iran.

“Consulting them? I thought I was supposed to be insulting them. And I was doing a great job of that. Probably the best insulting anyone has ever done to every global ally this country has had for the last 80 years or so.

Yeah, consulting insulting, incursion, excursion. These are all just big stupid words. Nobody knows what they mean anyway. All you need to know is, I’m in charge and Trump knows best. Plus, I have the best words.

And speaking of the worst words, what the hell is a Hormuz? If Iran wants Trump to stop bombing them, they will have to rename that so-called strait the Strait of Trump. Thank you for your attention to this matter.”

Here’s a really good consult or insult from just the other day, with the Japanese Prime Minister Sanae Takaichi visiting the Remains of The White House:

For context: Trump was trying to convince the Japanese PM to support him and provide military assistance for his illegal war. I believe that is what the law calls ‘aiding and abetting’.

And, we’re off…

Japanese Questioner: Why didn’t you tell allies in Europe and Asia, like Japan, about the war before attacking Iran?

Don Rickles…I mean, Trump: “Because we wanted surprise. Who knows better about surprise than Japan? Why didn’t you tell me about Pearl Harbor? Okay? Right?*

I. Mangrey: What the actual fuck is wrong with you, sir? Have you ever thought about hara-kiri, sir?

Japanese PM Takaichi trying desperately to not go all
Bruce Lee on Dementia Don’s dumb fucking ass

There is nothing else I can add to that without inspiring a visit from the Secret Service, which by the way is not actually a secret. Someone might want to let them know that.

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*Actual fucking quote. And NO, not okay, and not right, you blabbering butterbrain.

I. Mangrey, WTAF.

This Is Pretty…

Fucking Intense

March 22, 2026

Sen. Bernie Sanders in dialogue with AI Claude

I have to assume this is real. It is actually a brilliant idea. I wonder if this was his idea or that of a young intern or aide. Bernie Sanders has a dialogue with Anthropic’s AI Claude. A fairly circumscribed inquiry into AI and privacy – as good a topic as any, I’d say. At one point, I though Bernie had blown its “mind.” There was a long pause – I’m surprised there wasn’t a [gulp] sound effect – while an answer was being generated, and it was probably the best thing I’ve ever witnessed out of AI.

I have kept me distance from AI – as much as that is even possible already – I don’t have any direct experience that I know of. I certainly have not asked it any questions or used it to fabricate* anything. I was surprised at how candid and honest Claude was. See, I’m now forced to refer to whatever-the-fuck AI Claude is the same way I would refer to a human being.

Two months ago, we posted AI Will Kill Us Before It Kills Us, and its sequel. This exchange, while in some ways providing some positive feedback on this new Era in human history, does absolutely nothing to temper the notion that we will quite quickly be unable to put the AI toothpaste back in the psycho-evolutionary tube of human society.

So long, and thanks for all the bytes.

And for the

Donald Trump memorial Epstein files

More please!

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*This word, of course, has two very different connotations, though when used to indicate dishonesty, still retains the essence of its primary usage – to invent, construct or manufacture. I’ll let you know which way I meant it when I figure that out.

I. Mangrey, all natural.

Save Us, Sir

Keep Up The Goof Work

March 21, 2026 

There is only one person, one woman, one man, one whatever, who can stop America’s freefall into total oblivion. Someone with a very, very large, uh-brain, perhaps a very stable genius who is very strong with the cognitive, and has the best words, who came down from heaven (well, from the second floor) on wings of gold (well, on an escalator of gold), with hair so golden (well, it’s not really hair per se, but it does vaguely resemble something like it). Someone who took this once proud and powerful nation, grabbed it with tiny, little hands and turned it right around to remake it in his own image – literally – and plastered his soon-to-be-reviled name* all over everything while he drove it straight off a proverbial cliff into total ruin in an unprecedentedly short time.

There is only one who can save us from himself. And it’s not Studebaker Hawk, it is none other than Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump.

Donald, Donald, he’s our…I want to say, man?…if he can’t do it, no one can. Let's keep it that way.

Trump’s chief-of-staff Susie Wiles seen here suddenly
realizing she is Trump’s chief-of-staff,
either that, or she just heard him say something.

So Donald, sir, with tears in my eyes (probably an eyelash in there), my hand on my heart (I’d rather it was on your throat) a desperate nation begs you – please keep doing what you’re doing, sir, for just a few months more, and we mean that literally. Just a little more of that Trump magic. Because every day, possibly every hour, with every horrifying move you make, every fetid breath you take, every unstable step you take, more people hate your slimy, stinky guts and want you the fuck out of here.

Flay at the pump

Thank you for your…I want to say, service?...and for your attention to this matter.

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*There are reports that Trump has talked to longtime advisers about what it would take to officially make his birthday a national, federal holiday. Someone should tell this fascist fuckwit that the Trump name will soon be retired and removed from every government structure. Next to his name on the list of presidents, there will be a skull-and-crossbones…and a poop emoji.

I. Mangrey reporting. Keep those cards and letters coming in.

Question For The Day – Alternative Intelligence

I See Dumb People

March 20, 2026

“Nothing bad can happen. It can only good happen.”
             Dumb Old Trump, September 23, 2025

“The only thing prohibiting transit in the straits (sic) right now is Iran shooting at shipping. It is open for transit should Iran not do that.”
             Secretary of Dumbass, Peed Hegseth, March 13, 2026

“War is hell and Peed Hegseth is a dumb-ass mother fucker.”
                     I. Mangrey, March 13, 2026

Desperate Don runs crying to other countries to help finish the illegal, unprovoked, insane WAR Trump started without a plan or a clue in Iran. Apparently, every country was driving through a tunnel and could not take Donny’s call…not even Nambia. Maybe it’s because Donny has been pissing and farting all over our allies at every turn. What about all his Bored of Peace buddies? Where the fuck are they? Don’t they care about their chairman of the bored?

“It’s Donald, pick up the fucking phone you losers.
I don’t need your sorry asses, but you better help me before it’s too late.”

The world has not seen this much global destruction – albeit without the instantaneous mass death and smithereened real estate – perpetrated by a single individual since Robert Oppenheimer proclaimed, “I am become death.” That individual today is one Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump. Trump’s ill-advised – everyone except Lindsey Graham and Dry-drunk Hague-seth advised against such a completely moronic and doomed-from-the-start “little excursion” – unilateral (no one else wants any part of this debacle) attack on Iran is poised to plunge the entire world into a major recession.

Donald, Donald, he’s our man, if he can’t do it…we’d all be better off ‘cause no one else is fucking stupid, arrogant and dangerous enough to try this shit… Well, maybe Stephen Miller…or JD Vance…or Linsey Graham, or Peed Hague-seth. Oh, never mind.

Today’s Question For The Day:

Aren’t we fucking great enough already?

Bonus Question:

Hasn’t he done enough already?

This has been your Paying Attention™ Question For The Day.

Question For The Day – An Ex-Ex-President

We hope you enjoyed our little pause in the disaster, but it’s already time to jump back into Donald Trump’s Global Dumpster Fire with our recurring nightmare…I mean feature…

Question For The Day

Wishing Won’t Do It. Bombing Will.

March 18, 2026

Donald Trump – you might know him from his ubiquitous presence in the

Donald Trump Memorial Epstein Files

told reporters on Monday

“No president was willing to do what I’m doing. And the should have done it a long time ago; it would have been a lot easier. There’s no president that wanted to do it. And yet every president knew, I’ve spoken to a certain president, who I like actually, a past president, former president, he said “I wish I did it. I wish I did it.” But they didn’t do it. I’m doing it.”

A reporter who was somehow permitted to speak asked who that president was, to which Trump replied, “I can’t tell you that… It would be very bad for his career, even though he’s got no career left.”

It almost doesn’t matter what he was talking about, but the subject was Trump’s unprovoked, disastrous, world-fucking attack on Iran. Perhaps now, even Silly Putty-for-brains Trump is getting a sense of why no other president – even the one Dumb Donny claims wished they did it – did what he is doing. Everyone else in the entire fucking world (except Netanyahu) knows exactly why no one else did what Trump is doing.

Fun fact: Four living ex-presidents (except one) are on the record saying they have not discussed Trump’s bombing of Iran. All four living ex-presidents contacted by reporters denied wishing they had bombed Iran.* And there is only one ex-president that Trump likes actually.

Today’s Question For The Day:

Is this mystery “ex-president, former president” one that you see in the mirror and talk to every few minutes?

Bonus Question:

Or was it maybe Andrew Jackson?

Double Bonus Question:

Sir, do you realize that the guy you see in the mirror and talk to all the time is you?

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*Never-president John McCain famously parodied the Beach Boys’ Barbara Ann, singing “Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran.” But Donald Trump did not like John McCain because McCain was captured.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Question For The Day.

Science Is Golden

Birdosaurs

March 18, 2026

Full Disclosure: the team here at Paying Attention are suckers for science.

Long ago, many people were saying that birds were descended from the dinosaurs. More recently we learned that many dinosaurs we thought of as drab, scaly reptiles might have been brightly colored and were actually covered with feathers. More recently during one of our lunch gatherings, we watched a talk on the internets that sought to correct the birds-descended-from-dinosaurs narrative. According to many experts, birds actually are dinosaurs.

Behold the terrifying Chicadee Rex

The mighty (freaky), five-foot-tall Shoebill Stork

If it is true that birds are dinosaurs – and unless or until further research insists otherwise I will not doubt this – then why are they so scared of everything? I guess we’re lucky they don’t watch a lot of David Attenborough documentaries.

You surely would not want to meet up with a Shoebill Stork in a dark alley.

We hope you enjoyed this pause in the disaster.

Ed Venture
Managing Editor

Fly like a pterodactyl.