Don Trump Actually Fucking Said This™*

 

Dr. Dementia Does It Again

August 27, 2026

“Pretend PLEASE, that I’m on the ballot.”
                          Donald “Death-To-America” Trump, August 25, 2026

Deathbed Donald currently has the “strong support” of 13% of Americans. Even the Fascist/Trump/Epstein/Sedition Party only polls at 35% who strongly support the absolute worst, most criminal, sleepiest, dumbest, insanely narcissistic and most anti-democratic POTUS ever to insult, assault and desecrate the White House. These polling numbers perfectly complement his ball-kicking 64% nation-wide disapproval rating.

This demented, decomposing, dung-heap somehow “thinks” he is not on the ballot. First of all, every sitting (or in this case shitting) president is essentially on the ballot during every midterm election. And things usually do not go so well for them. In this case, especially since this “president” never shuts the fuck up and constantly rubs our noses in the fact that he is all powerful (which his tiny-hand-picked Supreme Court has codified into law), and everything he has done has benefitted him and his negative-number-IQ sons while completely fucking (more like raping, since that is really his preferred means of sexual interaction) every other American worth less than tens-of-millions of dollars.

He is doing nothing to win the midterm elections, but he is doing everything to fuck with and steal them.

Letter to the Predator:

Hey Donny Dumbass (That’s dumb with a ‘b’), guess what – you are without a doubt already on the ballot this November. You are the one who destroyed the White House; you are the one now threatening to level the Kennedy Center because We The People don’t want you to fuck it up with your idiotic, unnecessary “renovations”; you are the one who taxed We The People with your stupid, illegal tariff/taxes, and you are the one who started the dumbest fucking war in American history (move over George WTF Bush and your stupid, criminal invasion of Iraq). We blame you for the skyrocketing gas prices you keep telling us are no big deal. You are the one who the vast majority of Americans are holding responsible for the potentially-fatal mess that everyone knows you created since re-entering what are now The Remains of The White House. Oh yeah, and now your new, improved dumbest trade war of all time with…wait for it…Canada. All of this adds up to why you are working so hard to stop people from voting. Because people, for the most part, the very most part, hate your rotting guts.

So please, by all means, buy millions-of-dollars of ads reminding people that this election is all about you – after all, everything is. Right? And keep reminding people to vote like you're on the ballot. Every chance you get. And read every piece of bullshit propaganda young Natalie spoon feeds between diaper changes and keep flapping your gums about what a great job you’re doing and how much everyone loves you.

I for one hope you get what we deserve.

Signed,
Just another adoring fan.

_________________________________________
*As always, the full context does not make it any better. Also, good chance this feature will be popping up constantly for at least the next two years. Sorry.

This has been another painful edition of Don Trump Actually Fucking Said This™*
Remember, it will get worse before it gets much worse.

Headline Of The Day – Affirmative Distraction

Talk Is Cheat

August 26, 2026

From Alternet:

Poor Clarence. People exposing what he undeniably did, without his permission. What is this world coming to? Let us offer our sincerest condolences as best we can under the circumstances…

Go fuck yourself Uncle Thomas. Fuck you very much for all you’ve done for to this country.

Maybe Clarence “The Other White Meat” Thomas should be stinging about TAKING all those undisclosed gifts and being complicit in fucking our democracy into the ground. Just maybe.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Headline Of The Day.

Quote Of The Day – A Ford Ability

Trump v. Canada     

August 25, 2026

King of the idiots Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump decided to start a trade war with Canada. Yes, that Canada. Why? Because he is king of the idiots, that’s why. His incalculably tiny brain is shrinking faster than a speeding bullet. But that doesn’t stop his giant mouth from running more than the golden toilets at Mor-on-Lago, which he has to flush ten or twenty times for some reason.

Deathbed Donny closed his recent Untruth Social post thusly…

Super Genius Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trffffppmt, August 24, 2026

Ontario Premiere Doug Ford responded with the Paying Attention™ Quote Of The Day:

“You know what, I’ve been in this game a lot longer than he has. I got skin on me like an alligator And you think an insult from him hurts me? Well, bring in on buddy. I’m ready. Bring it on. You know something, I’ve dealt with guys like you my whole life. And guess what, you all become losers. Because you’re a loser.”
                   Doug Ford, Premier of Ontario, Canada, August 24, 2026

 
Ford to Trump: “Because you’re a loser.”

BONUS QUOTE

Ford also called Trump “king of bankruptcies”. If Canada had become the 51^st state as Trump has been insisting, Ford would have been more succinct and told Dumbass Don to shut the fuck up. But Ford and his fellow countrymen are still Canadians so his language was more polite than was appropriate.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Quote Of The Day.

Schmuck Of The Day – The Umpire Strikes Back

Weee’re OUT!

August 22, 2026

On any given day these days, there can be neither doubt nor serious competition. The biggest schmuck is, almost by definition, Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump. But we need to break things up from time to time and crown a different Schmuck For The Day.

Here we go again. The Roberts Supreme(ly Criminal) Court continues their valiant effort to aid and abet Trump’s crusade to defeat American democracy. This time they have reversed a lower court decision to stop the Taliban-esque destruction of the White House that is Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump’s staggeringly unpopular, unnecessary and hideous Oversized Gold-plated Outhouse he calls a ballroom.

While blatantly lying during his Senate confirmation hearing to become chief justice of the Supreme Court, John Roberts described how he would carry out his responsibilities of interpreting the law according to the Constitution as “calling balls and strikes” like a baseball umpire behind home plate.

Yer not Trump…yerrrrr outta heeeere!

Funny thing: Roberts has done anything but call balls and strikes. Even going so far as to call a ball a touchdown. Funnier thing: today in baseball, batters and catchers can now challenge an umpire’s call a few times per game. The issue is resolved using video evidence. This means that baseball is now more in touch with the times and with reality than self-proclaimed umpire John Roberts, and by extension – especially given the current makeup of the Court – the highest court in the land.

So what we can now see is that umpires make plenty of mistakes calling balls and strikes. Real umpires are famously unbiased and are doing the best they can, as they make decisions in the blink of an eye. The same cannot be said for Roberts when it comes to bias. As is more than likely with John Roberts, who has an agenda, which besides being personal and having no place in the work of a judge, puts him at odds with the American public, and more often than not, with legal precedent and the Constitution, he certainly has made more than his fair share of, let’s call them mistakes, “calling balls and strikes”. Unlike baseball umpires, Roberts has all the time in the world to make his critical calls. Also, unlike baseball umpires, Roberts repeatedly misses his calls on purpose.

Chief Injustice John Roberts
Schmuck around and find out

May his legacy reflect the evil he has perpetrated upon this nation for all eternity.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck Of The Day. Schmuck off!

Thought For The Day – Blather, Rant, Repeat

Cloudy With A Chance Of Death By Oil

August 20, 2026

This has been brought up repeatedly here and other places over the years, but here we are again. The first and smartest response to the 9/11 attacks on U.S. soil by Saudi Arabian actors would have been an immediate and aggressive pivot away from a petroleum-based world economy to implementing a 1960s space-race-like program toward renewable energy technology – much of which already existed – to end our addiction to the suicidal dependence on fossil fuels.

Now that, thanks to the idiot bastard president of the United States Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump and his completely unnecessary, unprovoked, illegal, ill-planned, beyond-incompetently carried out, and spectacularly-failed invasion of Iran, the Strait of Hormuz has been taken off the table as far as being a safe, reliable conduit for the global petroleum murder of the planet…I mean market, there is once again the same first and smartest response:

Fuck petroleum. End the stranglehold of the environmental catastrophe that is the incessant, unbridled combustion of fossil fuels. End the strangulation of most of the world’s citizens by the fossilized hearts and minds of the oil-igarchs and the politicians they own. Stop the welfare that keeps these oil companies afloat.

To which you are rightly thinking, Dream on McDuff.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

Freudian Slipper

“Sometimes an asshole is just an asshole.”

Sigmund I. Freud

Calling Dr. Freud…Again

August 19, 2026

More on moron Todd Blanche: The following exchange took place during a recent interview on the heels of Todd Blanche’s confirmation as the country’s president’s new attorney general…

Kristen Welker: If the president asks you to do something that you feel crosses an ethical or legal line would you do it?

Toad Blanche: The president would never ask me to do something ethical or legal, or illegal, he never has, he never will.

Oopsie.

Blanche attempts to STFU, but cannot

This is not Blanche’s first toad-e-o; You may remember this exchange that took place during his confirmation hearing…

Sen. John Kennedy: Are you and president Trump friends?

Toad Blanche: I’m his lawyer, was his lawyer.

It’s entirely possible these are not Freudian slips. They are Freudian slaps.

Blanche, later made it crystal clear that he would do the president’s bidding at every turn. For those of you keeping score at home, that is absolutely not the job of the attorney general.

Todd Blanche is a shit stain on the rule of law. Oops, what a Freudian slip. I meant to say Todd Blanche should go fuck himself until there are no more tomorrows. I'm so embarrassed.


I. Mangrey reporting.

This Is* Why We Can’t Have Nice Things – White Men**

“Blanche” Is French For ‘White’

August 18, 2026

In their latest thrust to re-rape all the Epstein victims, and democracy writ large, the Fascist/Trump/Epstein/Sedition Party senators voted to confirm Trump’s criminal criminal attorney Todd Blanche as the next Attorney Fucking General of the United Fucking States. Guess Trump didn’t want to try nominating statutory rapist Matt Gaetz again.

Blanche had to promise to meet with the Epstein victims he has ignored for so long in order to get the votes from freshly ousted idiots Tom Tillis (R-NC), who dared pretend to stand up for the release of the

Donald Trump Memorial Epstein Files,

and John Cornyn (R-TX). Trump endorsed both Tillis’ and Cornyn’s opponents in a successful bid to primary these two hapless halfwits out of office for being mean to Deathbed Donny once or twice after voting for all his bullshit 90% of the time.

Blanche, who was responsible for un-redacting victims’ names while redacting the names of Epstein’s Trumps…I mean johns, pretended to meet with the victims. He sat in the same room with them, but instead of actually hearing what they had to say, he just sat there like a dick in the headlights, leaving the women with nothing more than another bad taste in their mouths and the need for one of those Karen Silkwood-type HAZMAT showers after being shit on once again by another pedophile/rapist enabler doing Trump’s bidding; this time the soon-to-be attorney general.

The other slithering senate shithead who could have put the kibosh on Blanche’s ill-gotten appointment was none other than Sen. Bill Cassidy (R-LA). Cassidy, a licensed physician. You may remember Cassidy as the pathetic ghoul who was the deciding vote in the Senate that pushed Bobby Brainworm over the finish line to be secretary of Health and Human Services – three things the heroin addict, anti-science zombie who bragged about snorting cocaine off of toilet seats knows nothing about. Cassidy should have his medical license and breathing privileges revoked.

These three disgraceful troglodytes provided cover for the ever-concerned Snoozin’ Collins and her fellow phony Lisa Murkowski to pretend to vote against Blanche’s confirmation since Blanche had enough votes without them.

Fuck all five of these sniveling, shriveling, shit-stains and every other member of their caucus of cretins for this and every other of their countless fuck-yous to this country in service of the feces-factory-in-a-suit that leads their party’s march toward fascism and this country’s march toward oblivion.

________________________________________________
*Yet Another Fucked Up Reason
**And The White Women Who Enable Them

I. Mangrey reporting. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Pic Of The Day – King Cheat-o

The Golf War   

August 16, 2026

Now With A Thousand Fewer Words

He cheats at marriage. He cheats in business. He cheats on his taxes. And he is desperate to cheat at the coming midterm elections.

But perhaps more frequently than anything, he cheats at golf. This was immortalized in Rick Reilly’s seminal work

A number of others who have hit the links with the guy who stinks at golf but manages to win dozens and dozens of “tournaments” at golf clubs he owns have observed flagrant cheating. Though Hall of Fame NFL quarterback Peyton Manning told Jimmy Kimmel in 2017 that Trump did not cheat, but “he will give you a lot of putz (I may have that spelling wrong), but he expects those to be reciprocated”, which I think means he doesn’t require opponents to actually sink the last putt and expects them to return the “favor”. Trump is a verifiably lousy putz…I mean putter.

Donny Douchebag – Prince of of Putts…I mean Putz

I know very little about golf, but I imagine a gorilla would handle a golf club with greater finesse.

And here is Trump’s caddy helping the old man with an unusual “stroke”

Lastly, today’s actual Pic Of The Day. Watch Big Baby Don’s special putting technique in this moving picture

A great way to knock a few strokes off your “score”

This has been your Paying Attention™ Pic Of The Day.

Happy Birthday Woodstock

Whatever Else You May Think, It Was Sure Better Than Today

August 15, 2026

Another day, another Trumpian disaster. Therapist-in-chief…oops, The Rapist-in-chief continues his non-stop-onslaught against truth, justice and the American way. He and his malignant marauders don’t even bother hiding their contempt for the law, the Constitution and you. Trump’s Fuck-You presidency will not stop dismembering democracy until something or someone kneels on his neck…metaphorically, of course. Right? When George Floyd was stopped from being alive, he was an innocent man. Donald Trump is very likely the most guilty man in American history.

But we would like to take this moment to remember a less tragic event.

Given that this is summer and the one month that has no commonly recognized holidays, we at Paying Attention™ have been called upon by a higher power to make our own. This was easy since there are two august events in August that are near and dear to our hearts and minds – Resignation Day(s), which recently came and went, and the Woodstock Music and Arts Festival.

Though Resignation Day(s) arrives first on the calendar, Woodstock preceded the former in real time. Both of these events provided hope for the future of humankind in my eyes, and in those of many of my generation at the time. What fools we were.

Being in a rather lazy mood, or maybe it’s more burnout than anything else, the gang here at Paying Attention™ agreed it would be best to wander aimlessly down memory lane as we celebrate another favorite August holiday around here. If nothing else, may we recommend cranking up a few of the tunes featured below.

Whatever you decide, Happy Birthday Woodstock. Here’s what appeared at Paying Attention™ on this day in 2019…

When Boomers Roamed the Earth

August 15, 2019

Max Yasgur was an upstate New York farmer and the largest milk producer in Sullivan County, New York in 1969.  Yasgur was a Republican who supported the Vietnam War, but he went against the wishes of his sleepy rural community of Bethel, and rented out his farm for a weekend music festival in August of 1969, thinking it would be good for the local economy and would help bridge the contentious generation gap. 

What could be so bad about having a few thousand kids listen to music in the fresh air for a few days?  Though the local folks for the most part wanted nothing to do with a bunch of hippies coming anywhere near their peaceful environs, no one imagined the size of the crowd or the ultimate notoriety of what was about to engulf them.  It was like an invasion, a caravan if you will, of unfamiliar outsiders, whose differences frightened these simple people.  In the end, it was, as Max Yasgur would tell the crowd on his farm, “three days of fun and music, and nothing but fun and music” that rocked the world.  Literally and figuratively.

I did not make it to Woodstock.  I really wanted to go, but I was not of driving age and my parents would not let me.  Especially now that I have fewer days to look forward to than the number I have already seen, I cannot blame them. 

I did see the movie the moment it came out because I was not willing to wait for it to come out on Netflix.  And I played the album many times on my cheapo turntable which I foolishly set up on my suburban back lawn (Surprisingly, that album still plays almost perfectly).  Since then, I have been a bit obsessed with what many have called “three days that defined a generation.”

The Woodstock Music and Art Festival began on this day 50 years ago [in 2019].  The line-up of musicians was and is legendary, if not unequaled.  From Richie Havens to Ravi Shankar, from Janis to Jimi, The Who, Santana, Sly & the Family Stone, Joe Cocker, Joan Baez, Creedence, the Dead, CSNY, Country Joe and many others.

Here are a few of my (many) favorite performances. 

Richie Havens – Freedom

John Sebastian – I Had a Dream

Max Yasgur

The Ultimate Star Spangled Banner

It is said, “If you can remember Woodstock, you weren’t there.” 

I. Mangrey reminiscing.  I remember Woodstock.

SPECIAL BONUS TRACK

Country Joe & The Fish