Broken News – Driving Miss Donny

The Reflecting Fool

July 15, 2026

Despite his brain remnants having one lobe out the door leading to permanent hiatus, Donald “Death-To-America” Trump still has control of the federal government. His still-barely-sentient remains are bound and determined to fuck this country deep into the ground until it is unrecognizable, and very likely permanently damaged beyond repair.

Hopefully, there will be enough left for us to salvage some little sliver of America with the coming midterms and the dislodging of the Fascist/Trump/Epstein Party’s majority in the House, and with some serious luck (fuck you Graham Platner), the Senate (fuck you too, Fetterman).

Speaking of damaged beyond repair, why is there so little mention of Disaster Don taking his motorcade for a Sunday drive through – I kid you not, through – the Reflecting Pool AFTER IT WAS PAINTED AND SEALED. Not to mention his no-bid-contract-buddies, who likely split the no-bid paycheck with Donny Conjob, completely fucked the job sixty ways from Sunday. But mostly, Trump had his motorcade DRIVE LENGTHWISE THROUGH THE REFLECTING POOL AFTER IT WAS PAINTED AND SEALED, which damaged the impregnable, un-cuttable super-strong and powerful rubber sealant before refilling the Pool.

“This [pool coating] will last for at least fifty years* and you’ll never have a leak, it’s very strong. You couldn’t, if you had a knife – I don’t want to give anybody ideas – if you had a knife, you can’t even cut it, so strong, so powerful, it’s powerful rubber.”
                       Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, May 5, 2026

Apparently, it is not vehicle-proof. And Donny’s motorcade is not made up of your average cars. These are heavily fortified, massively heavy tanks in cars’ clothing.

“We have vandalism… You know, we have a hundred, we have I think a 290, 300-foot slit right through it. Probably a box cutter or a knife of some kind… Who would think that somebody would go into a pool and take a knife and start cutting it?”
                       Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, June 22, 2026

Yes, there was vandalism involved. It seems some idiot, and a bunch of his buddies drove a bunch of cars all the way across the Reflecting Pool before refilling it with the water that would, in record time thanks to the new stupidly dark color some yahoo insisted, against all advice, decided to paint it, become an instant destination for a massive algae gathering.

Actual news report

In a severely under-reported story, intrepid Paying Attention™ reporter Allison Wunderland has learned that the company responsible for the horrific paint job on the Reflecting Pool is the same one that does Donny’s face.

And one more thing: If you’re reading this Donny, no one put algae in the fucking pool you dimwitted, bleach-drinking bozo. Ask anyone who’s not on your team – it’s called biology. Nature can be annoying, but it’s infinitely stronger, more powerful and definitely smarter than you. But then again, who isn’t.

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*Or 30 days, whichever comes first.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Lindsey Graham bashing.

Happy Bastille Day

Liberté, Égalité, Fraternité

July 14, 2026

Bonjour mes amis. Since there was no good reason to celebrate American Independence Day with this nation laboring under the crushing weight of a flaccid, fascist fuckwit, let’s take a minute to acknowledge the country that made American independence possible – France. Without France it is unlikely the nation would ever have gotten off the ground. Now we have one foot in the grave thanks to our current commander-in-cheat.

America’s great slave-owning/impregnating founder Thomas Jefferson helped Marquis de Lafayette, a key ally during the American Revolution, compose a French bill of rights in June of 1789; Jefferson also helped to draft their constitution.

Naturally, France today has their own fascist fuckwit – Marie Le Pen – to deal with, but they have managed to keep her at bay…for the time being. Le Pen hopes to follow in Trump’s footsteps by running for office after being convicted of crime – specifically, embezzlement. Le Pen is running for a fourth time, is leading in the polls and may have to run while wearing an electronic device as ordered by the Paris court of appeal.

Aren’t fascists fun? (Spoiler alert: fuck no)

Anyway, a quick salute to the French, while they’re still worth saluting and while this country remains unworthy.

I. Mangrey, out.

Broken News – Graham: Cracker

Riddance

July 13, 2026

I wanted to take some time to process the passing of Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-Secession State). No need to rush to judgment. Plenty have already weighed in. I wanted to look over his long Senate career, the ups and downs, the wins and losses.

I was going to let Graham's passing pass, but then I decided it would be bad form to speak nil of the dead. I’ll be brief.

When Graham was running against Trump in 2015, here’s what he said about his opponent:

“He’s a race-baiting, xenophobic, religious bigot. He doesn’t represent my party.”
                                 CNN, December 8, 2015

Soon after, Graham began his crusade to leave a permanent imprint of his lily-livered lips on Trump’s rancid rear end.

“Trump and I, we’ve had a hell of a journey. I hate it to end this way. Oh my God, I hate it. From my point of view, he’s been a consequential president. But today, all I can say is count me out. Enough is enough.”
                             Congress, January 6, 2021

Soon after that statement Lindsey, having long ago kissed Trump’s ass so frequently one of the cheeks bears his name, decided to try his luck (and his lips) around the front.

Yep, enough is enough

Graham pathetically won the undying demand for loyalty with none in forthcoming in return from the insurrectionist, ruthlessly narcissistic pedophile protector Trump. The senator from the Secession State lost whatever shred of self-respect he might have had in previous times. He went out on the lowest of notes – one that only whales can hear.

The best news is that I can stop feeling bad about myself for yelling at him on my tv to drop dead.

Thank you Lindsey. You will be missed…by some.

Next stop: Mitch McConnell. I prefer not to speak ill of the soon-to-be dead. But I’ll be ready when the time comes.

I. Mangrey reporting. One down, two to go.

My Bad

Apology: Ever-Ending War

July 12, 2026

Trump promised over and over on the campaign trail not to get America embroiled in any more never-ending wars. Many critics have accused him of breaking this promise, Paying Attention™ among them. For this, we apologize.

As we have seen over the past four-plus months, Trump’s illegal, ill-advised, ill-managed, unprovoked and badly failing attack-turned-war with Iran is not never-ending. Truth be told, the war with Iran has ended almost every day since it began so it is patently unfair to call this an endless war. It has already ended more times than any other war in history. And it’s just getting started.

Not only has Death-To-America Don begun and ended this war – it’s not a conflict, an operation, and excursion or a skirmish, it’s a fucking war Donny Dearest – more times than anyone cares to count, he spent his time with NATO recently trying to start wars against many, if not most of our allies. Mostly over Donny’s ongoing tantrum over not being given Greenland.

Donald J. Quixote – Man Of Dementia

Don Revolty and Sancho Pinhead

During, the recent NATO meeting, when Donny wasn’t busy calling Ukraine President Volodymyr Zelenskyy “President Putin”* or referring to the “Islamic Republic of Japan”*,or suddenly ordering his lackey Treasury Secretary Scott Pissant to cut off trade with Spain (Huh?), or falling asleep, or quietly soiling himself, Der Furor was claiming that the ceasefire that never really was still isn’t, or might be over, or he might do war crimes by bombing Iran’s water treatment and power plants. When asked if full-scale war is back, the brain-dead president of the United States replied, “I don’t know.” He also said negotiations were going well, but Iran says there are no negotiations and will not be any until the U.S., being held hostage by Trump, stops violating the non-existent ceasefire.

The Man of Dementia needs to go into Psychotics Anonymous or rehab…or something

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*Not making this up.

I. Mangrey reporting. Life goes off.

Broken News – Mitching A Fit

Unwanted: Dead Or Alive

July 11, 2026

Mitch McConnell was found unresponsive in his home three weeks ago. There has been no report as to how responders knew he was dead. Neither has there been a single word from McConnell or his team about his condition. 

So for now, former Senate majority leader and long-time anti-democracy, self-serving piece of shit McConnell should be considered AWOL – Absent Without Life. May he rest in greatly undeserved peace, be he dead or alive.

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*Trump’s first lie about the price-tag for his giant vanity hole…
 

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled aging process.

De Plane! De Plane!

Boss! De plane! De plane!

Air Farce One: Baby On Board
                   or
Couldn’t Get The Epstein Plane?

July 11, 2026

Funny story, Trump’s Qatari Emolument Express was retro-fitted hastily and is not in appropriate condition to be used as Air Force One. The flying white elephant, which the Qataris unsuccessfully attempted to dump for years and which Baby Donny begged them to give him, and which has already cost nearly a billion dollars* to shoddily upgrade, is without essential military defenses or secure communications technology. No reports of algae...so far, but there are reports of unbreathable air throughout the aircraft of late.

Of course, all Deathbed Donny cares about is how much gold is on the inside. You know what, if Donny wants to risk getting blown out of the sky, that’s his fucking business. He’s a big boy. Let him ride in a gold-plated bi-plane if he wants to. He’s the fucking president of the United States – he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Just ask him.

The only good thing about this flying fuck-up is that Death-To-America Don has no plan to leave this so-called “gift to the United States” for his successors; he is planning to take it with him. To be fair, he will need a large vehicle to store all the rest of the stolen documents and emoluments he will no doubt be claiming for himself if he departs the Remains of The White House with a pulse.

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*Which appears to have been pilfered from the sacred Pentagon budget.

I. Mangrey reporting.

Broken Noise – Coming Soon

Grinding The Axes

July 10, 2026

Jen Psaki was a top advisor to President Barack Obama. After that she was the longtime press secretary for President Joe Biden; maybe you remember him. Biden was the guy whose successor (and predecessor) relentlessly accused Biden of being mentally unfit and tagged him with epithet “Sleepy Joe” Biden. This other guy has been seen sleeping in the courtroom while on trial (and ultimately convicted 34 times) himself (something that never happened to Joe Biden), at his sickening military parade/birthday party, at meetings in the Oval Office (a place where Joe Biden was never caught napping); the Grim Sleeper was also seen catching some Z’s at Madison Square Garden during the NBA finals, during his disgusting for-profit birthday cage fight, and countless other times and places. I don’t mean to complain; those sporadic moments are the only times America is safe from the greatest threat to our democracy since the Civil War, domestically, and World War II globally. That threat is Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump.

Like the mold-ridden stock of roast beef at the local deli, he needs to be 86’d.

As an aside, another thing Biden and this other guy do not have in common is Biden not appearing tens-of-thousands of times in the

 Donald trump memorial EPSTEIN FILES

Based on her performance during the Biden administration, Jen Psaki would never make it in the current administration. Her obvious intelligence, breadth of experience and unwillingness to perpetually lie through her teeth every time her lips move immediately disqualify her from serving in Degenerate Don’s addled, aggravated-assault administration.

These days Psaki hosts a nightly show on MS NOW entitled “The Briefing”.

This inspired the Paying Attention™ special features team to launch a new feature. Stay tuned for special reports on the all-new

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled bobbing and weaving.

Cryer Beware

So Long, And Thanks For All The Fascism

July 8, 2026

WAKE UP, AMERICA!*

That is the title of the 1971 LP by the late great Abbie Hoffman. A true American patriot. I felt a sudden urge to reiterate this critical plea/warning/?

If you’re like me, and hopefully you are not, but stay with me for a minute here…even I, while admittedly too much of my time is spent Paying Attention™, regularly blot from my overheating, throbbing and ever more damaged mind the fact that technically there are still some two-and-one-half (GULP!) years remaining in the Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump so-called presidency. This fact was always present intellectually but has lately begun insinuating itself into my emotional infrastructure.

This is completely untenable. Trump might actually end up being the last president ever. America might well end up taking its own life before Trump’s time in office runs out…assuming he will ever leave, or will only leave after crowning Don Fucking, Jr. as his successor for life, after which Trump will have himself stuffed, mounted and bolted down in the Oval Office. The taxidermy won’t take much work since Trump’s head has long appeared as though a mortician prepared him for burial, and his body is mostly made up of preservatives at this point.

Speaking of staying in power, we recently learned that Der Furor was thrilled when a historian** provided “proof” that Trump was “the most powerful man who’s ever existed on the planet.” What Dying Don was even more amazed by was the rest of the top five most powerful of all time; the list included Napoleon, Mao Zedong, Josef Stalin and Adolf Hitler. Damaged Don must be so proud; his mentor/ventriloquist Vladimir Putin didn’t even make the list.

Drool and the gang

If we do not crush the Fascist/Trump/Epstein Party in November, our chances of surviving to January 20, 2029 are no better than Jeffrey Epstein returning from the dead to release all his files.

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* The album ends with this bit of advice from Abbie: “And all you kiddies, remember to lay off the needle drugs. The only dope worth shooting is Richard Nixon.”
**Funny story: that historian was actually a golf caddy by trade, and not in fact any kind of historian. I’ll wait for you to stop laughing and then I’ll wait a bit longer for you to stop crying. Or desperately searching for your passport. Or both.

I. Mangrey reporting through the pain. 

Thought For The Day – Just A Reminder

Raging Grannies

July 6, 2026

Enjoy the Piedmont Raging Grannies covering ​‪Bette Midler’s rewrite of Woody Guthrie’s 1940 classic. Bette wrote the new lyrics to address our current “unprecedented destruction of all normal behavior” courtesy of Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, and to remind us all that we have the power – if we choose to exercise it – at the midterms.

All You Fascists Bound to Lose

And here’s Bette’s version…

Oh, what the heck, here’s Woody…

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.