Trump Actually Drains A Swamp

Don't Stink The Water

June 23, 2026

Apparently, killing tens (or was it hundreds?) of thousands of Americans with his mishandling of COVID (and Bob Woodward sitting on knowledge that could have averted many of these deaths until his for-profit book was finished – as were all those previously alive people) was not good enough for good old Donald “Death-To-America” Trump. He is now murdering baby ducks. The combination of Don’s choice of very dark paint – an algae accelerant – and his idiot pool guy from Palm Beach

Yeah, this cartoon-come-to-life pool guy

helped create an algae bloom like no one has ever seen – the biggest, most beautiful algae bloom of all time. Not only that but, as predicted and warned before the fact, the coating barely lasted a week before it started disengaging from the surface.

Naturally, Trump blamed everyone but those who were actually to blame. That would be Trump himself and his idiot, sleazy pool guy. But mostly Donald. The fuck-up stops there.

Just for the record, the pool guy is Trump donor and Mar-a-Lago neighbor John Cafaro. Trump illegally gave him a no-bid contract to paint the reflecting pool. Cafaro has two prior convictions, one for bribing a member of Congress and another for an illegal loan that violated campaign finance laws. In other words, a perfect fit for a 34-time-convicted-felon-president who likely split the insanely over-priced payday (some $15 million) right down the middle with his fellow felon.

“This [pool coating] will last for at least fifty years and you’ll never have a leak, it’s very strong. You couldn’t, if you had a knife – I don’t want to give anybody ideas – if you had a knife, you can’t even cut it, so strong, so powerful, it’s powerful rubber.”
                       Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, May 5, 2026

“We have vandalism… You know, we have a hundred, we have I think a 290, 300-foot slit right through it. Probably a box cutter or a knife of some kind… Who would think that somebody would go into a pool and take a knife and start cutting it?”
                       Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, June 22, 2026

After the latter quote Trump was then asked if he had proof, “Let’s put it this way, when you have a 350-foot slit* from one end to the other, do you think that’s proof?” Well, no actually, that’s not proof, and that’s all the proof Donny Dickweed needs.

Also just for the record, what Trump wanted done to the Reflecting Pool was not a repair. Just like his daily façade charade make-over with his comb-around-and-around-and-around, and his pancake fakeup, his approach to the Pool was nothing more than that.

But I digress…

Before blaming his latest massive fuck-up on Joe Biden, antifa and unknown “vandals” Boss Tweet had his lying monkeys dose the pool, or pond or lake with hydrogen peroxide, which momentarily killed off the algae while simultaneously separating the paint job from the pool or pond or lake. So yes, vandals were responsible for the utter, and extremely predictable demise of the “American Flag Blue” assault on the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, which is neither pond nor lake. Again, for those keeping score, those vandals were Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump and John Cafano.

And now there is, for no good reason**, an enhanced National Guard presence at the Pool. This is presumably a prelude to deporting the algae and the dead duck.

Dead Duck: A Metaphor For Trump’s America

Add to this quintessentially on-brand Trump debacle the unfortunate collateral damage – an unavoidable and consistent feature of every Trump venture – of the baby ducks found dead in the Pool.

Now Trump has to drain the Pool again. He is draining us every single fucking day.

Trump’s sewage formation plant, formerly known as the Reflecting Pool, is now beginning to stink literally rather than just figuratively. 

The primary perpetrator of the destruction/”repair”/re-destruction of the iconic landmark (the same guy who did pretty much the same thing with Iran) – Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump – remains at extra-large.

To borrow from Monty Python and The Holy Grail, let’s see if Trump is a witch. 

Throw him into the pond…or lake…or fucking Reflecting Pool!

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*Oh, so now it’s already up to 350-foot? Are those fucking vandals still down there holding their breath and cutting that un-cuttable very strong and powerful rubber?
**Unless they are trying to ensure the head vandal – Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump – gets nowhere near the scene of his crime.

I. Mangrey reporting. Is it safe? 

UPDATE

Our non-existent sources are reporting that going forward, after the Reflecting Pool is re-drained and the very strong and powerful un-cuttable rubber is sewn back together, it will instead be filled with air until such time as the water can be replaced by 6.75 million gallons of clear epoxy resin meant to resemble water…sort of. Or not.

Thought For The Day – SpaceWreX

In Mu$k We Tru$t...NOT

June 22, 2026

Elon Musk’s SpaceX recently launched its public trading in the stock market.

This makes Musk the first ever trillionaire…on paper. That’s trillion, with a fuck you. And a sieg heil.

Nobel Prize winner Paul Krugman insists the stock is not worth anywhere near its claimed opening market value.

Typical SpaceX launch sequence. Oopsie.

With any luck it will blow up like most of the rockets he launched. Except everyone but Musk will get hurt when SpaceX stock insinuates itself into many Americans’ 401Ks – without them even knowing it, and then tanks. When it crashes, Musk will have already made off with the cash, while all the involuntary investors will be left holding the bag.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

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Non-AI simulation

Everything In Its Place

June 21, 2026

We have thrown around the epithet Donald “Death-To-America” Trump sarcastically for quite some time now. Maybe you didn’t take it that way, and maybe we didn’t exactly take that way either, but sarcasm is so essential to the mission statement and day-to-day operation of this here blog. But that is now a thing of the past. Not the sarcasm itself. Fuck no. That would be ludicrous, not to mention impossible.

From now on, anytime we use the epithet Donald “Death-To-America” Trump it will be done with all the seriousness and sincerity available, though not as some sort of insult. No, it is simply irrefutable, objective fact. Cold, hard fact. Not alternative fact. Scientifically provable fact. Very inconvenient truth.

Everything else will continue to be awash in sarcasm, irony and dramatic metaphor. But the use of Donald “Death-To-America” Trump should be taken as literally serious as a motherfucking heart attack.

Now, this is kind of a minor example, but still quite useful in proving the point. Examples of Der Furor’s tireless efforts to accomplish his “Death-To-America” are, after all, darn near infinite. The Asshole-in-chief started one of the dumbest (with a capital ‘b’ – courtesy of DTA Trump) wars in history, which has become a global clusterfuck, a domestic economic disaster-heading-for-tsunami, especially after his idiotic tariffs blew up in his and by extension our faces, and what was he busy with?

Here’s What He Was Busy With

“We picked a color called ‘American Flag Blue’; we had color choices.”

After his weekly doctor visit and cognitive test and then disappearing for a week, Deathbed Don showed up on my tv showing me fucking color swatches and size comparisons (he is not changing the size of the 100-plus-year-old installation) for the goddam Reflecting Lake*. The effing president of the United States. Of America.

But Wait, There’s Moron

And now we have to talk about the latest** attack on America: Trump’s pick to replace the vile and pernicious Tulsi Gabbard as director of national intelligence – Bill Pulte, currently Der Furor’s hatchet man hand-picked by convicted felon Roger Stone, with you-guessed-it zero qualifications for anything other than being a thug who will, while jeopardizing national security like no one has ever seen, will do nothing other than go after his boss’ enemies. Oh, and he does not, and probably could not get anywhere near the necessary security clearance.

To be fair, Pulte – a real-estate-magnate-trust-fund-baby – does have one of the most Trumpian qualifications; two-and-a-half years ago Pulte received a “trophy”, in the shape of a dildo with the inscription “Bill Pulte Fucks, But Only The Young”.

Pulte (right): “That looks pretty bad-ass.”

DTA Don is running out of top-shelf shitheads, scumbags and seditionists and is scraping what is hopefully the bottom of the barrel oozing with rotten apples. I would say that one good apple don’t redeem the whole bunch, but there is not one single apple not teeming with worms and maggots and mold. Oh my.

Thank you for your attention to this monster.

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*This is what our idiot bastard president calls the famous Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool. Reminiscent of Jethro Bodine’s cement pond. Jethro, however was a harmless doofus. Trump is a psychotic malefactor with blood on his tiny, decomposing hands.
**Though this one got short-circuited by public uproar.

I. Mangrey reporting.

On Golden Shower Pond

The Donald Trump Memorial Rejecting Pond…Or Lake As Some Call It*

June 19, 2026

I am Scam. I am Scam. Scam-I-Am.

That Scam-I-Am! That Scam-I-Am! I do not like that Scam-I-Am!

Do you like green pool and scam?

I do not like them, Scam-I-Am.
I do not like green pool and scam.

Would you like them in D.C.?

I would not like them in D.C.
I would not like them near a tree.
I do not like green pool and scam.
I do not like them, Scam-I-Am.

Would you like them on the Mall?
Would you like them spring or fall?

I do not like them on the Mall.
I do not like them spring or fall.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere.
I do not like green pool and scam.
I do not like them, Scam-I-Am.

Would you prefer them in in your face?
Would you prefer them any place?

Not in my face. Not any place.
Not on the Mall. Not spring or fall.
I won’t prefer them here or there.
I won’t prefer them anywhere.
I will not like green pool and scam.
So fuck the hell off, Scam-I-Am.

Death-To-America Don has been loser…I mean laser…nah, let’s stick with loser-focused on making the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool great again.

Naturally, he had to brag about the size...which he had nothing to do with

Marvel at Trump’s beautiful blue Reflecting Pond…or Lake…or Sludge Pit. Your eyes do not deceive you. It is Trump that deceives you; that is not American Flag Blue you are looking at. You can’t even glimpse it through the green slime. Trump’s glorious aquatic fuck-up immediately turned to shit – or should I say an algae wonderland. It looks like everyone within a ten-mile radius has been blowing their noses into the pool. It looks like Trump took a bath in there.

Trump's Refluxng Puss Basin

Algae has been an ongoing problem in the Reflecting Pool. It seems that the algae attack on the pool has never been this bad this fast.  Like everything else Trump puts his “mind” and/or name to, it turns to shit faster than you can say Rumple-what-the-fuck-is-wrong-with-this-sick-fuck-stiltskin. And you will never guess that many on the other side of the pool are blaming Obama.

The iconic Reflecting Pool now mostly reflects Trump’s total and unrelenting greed, thievery and incompetence. To be fair, maybe it cannot be considered incompetence when there was never any intention whatsoever to have a job done right. After all, the main idea behind the “renovation” was, as it is with everything, everywhere, all the time with Donny Do-Bad, to put more of everyone else’s money in his ill-fitting pockets; it never had anything to do with improving anything but that.

If Trump actually wanted to do something constructive, he might have hired people who knew more than just their home addresses (presumably) and what size shoes they wore (allegedly), and instead tried to hire people who at least proposed ideas on how to better manage the algae problem before just slapping on a coat of paint that was known and warned would do exactly what it’s now doing, (for $13 million) and that you can bet your ass will be deteriorating in six months.** And we of course will have to pay to un-fuck it.

I guess we should be glad he didn’t put his fucking name all over the pool.

It’s A Pool, You Fool

It’s not a pond it’s not a lake
It’s a pool you fool
And you’re a fake

Please pack your shit
And fuck yourself
And please already, quit

You’ve fucked this country every possible way
You’ve taken all and given squat
And most of us can’t take even one more fucking day
This country needs lots and lots of everything you’re not

It’s a pool you fool
With a capital P, and that rhymes with T
And that stands for Tool

_______________________________________

*No one fucking calls it lake. No one.

**Damn! Once again we waited too long to post this. The fucking paint is already flaking off.

No, this is not an overhead shot of Florida after a big meal.
That, my friends is a slab of what some are calling “American Flag Blue” paint.
But at least you can finally see the paint through the algae. Checkmate.

I. Mangrey reporting. I’m cold Yossarian.

Thought For The Day – Luther Consequences

Happy Juneteenth!

June 19, 2026

Admittedly, my head is hotter than most. But, I just can’t deal with Barack Obama.

The Obama administration, thanks to John Kerry and his team of skilled, knowledgeable experts (the antithesis of Trump’s team of tragic twits), hammered out a nuclear deal between Iran, China, France, Russia, the U.K., the U.S, Germany and the European Union in 2015. That agreement was roundly believed to have held for a decade. Until one day – February 28, 2026 – Donald “Death-To-America” Trump tore it asunder and fucked everything nine-tenths of the way to hell.

Pro-Drama Obama

Obama recently offered a not so sternly worded critique of the current situation. He did not mention the perp by name. What the actual fucking fuck. Is he still trying to take the high road? Act with decorum? Fuck that shit. Not only should Obama have the gloves off, he should be brandishing some brass fucking knuckles…and maybe a Samurai sword. Especially since this is an election year.

There is no time for tap-dancing nuance. Trump fucked this up. Obama more than anyone has every right to call him out for it. In fact, it is Obama’s patriotic duty to verbally pound his fascist fuckwit successor into the dirt. On a regular basis.

After all of Trump's horrendous bullshit as of his war to stop Iran from every getting a nuclear weapon or even maintain possession of the nuclear material they already have, Iran has not surrendered a single nanogram of material, and now, very stable super America-first peace genius Trump says that Iran has every right to possess nuclear weapons. Checkmate.

It is well past time for Luther to take the wheel, the helm and the mic…

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.  

                                                                                      

Peace Is At Hand…Or Not

NOTHING ACCOMPLISHED

June 18, 2026

It looks like Trump has actually achieved the unconditional surrender that will bring his illegal, unprovoked, disastrous war with Iran to an end. Unfortunately, that unconditional surrender was his.

Other than a momentary distraction from the

Donald trump memorial EPSTEIN FILES^*

Trump accomplished exactly zero of his alleged goals in his stupid war of choice. He did not eliminate Iran’s nuclear program (you know, the nuclear program Trump said he and he alone obliterated months before he started a war) and did not remove one speck of potential weapons-grade nuclear material. He did not eliminate Iran’s military capability to any meaningful degree and he most definitely will not get Iran’s unconditional surrender. And he is planning to hand over twice as much cash as he attacked Barack Obama for giving Iran. Death-To-America Don would be lucky to get things back to anywhere near where the Obama administration had things ten years ago. We will not be that lucky because he will not be that lucky. All in all, a masterful display of ineptitude.

Amazing Disgrace, How Sick The Sound

This is not a peace deal. This is not even a piece of a peace deal. It is nothing more than a concept of a deal, a “Memorandum of Understanding”. The understanding is that Dying Donald is promising capitulation, appeasement and surrender. Because he is a loser. He punched Iran in the face and they kicked him in the balls and beat the shit out of him. As he lies there in a bloated, bloody heap looking up at them begging for mercy, Donald has cemented his legacy of losing, and hopefully he will drag the party that enabled him, propped him up and supported every fucked up move he made and word he said, down with him.

To be fair, he did manage to get regime change. Iran now has a much more hardline regime than it did before Trump took out the previous ayatollah along with countless replacements we might have preferred.

I’m the only president ever to take a cognitive test. 
I can tell my ass from a hole in the ground.

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*Man, whatever is in those files must really be bad for old Fartenstein, because his flying monkeys are really working their little tails off trying to figure out how to protect him from letting the public in on it.

I. Mangrey reporting. Take it or leave it.

Late Nite With I. Mangrey – It’s Sooner Than You Think

Happy Watergate Break-in Night

June 17, 2026

On the night of June 17, 1972, night security guard Frank Wills noticed something funny going on at the Watergate complex. A group of under-IQ’d “plumbers” working for Nixon's Committee to Re-elect the President (CREEP) were caught burglarizing and planting listening devices in the Democratic National Committee headquarters at the Watergate in Washington, D.C.

Nixon’s clowns had taped over the latches of stairwell doors to maintain access to the Watergate. Wills noticed the tape and alerted the Metropolitan Police who subsequently arrested five operatives wearing business suits and surgical gloves, and in possession of high-end surveillance equipment and a large sum of cash.

Naturally, Frank Wills, a black man doing his job and protecting democracy against a rogue president, was soon fired and his life permanently ruined because of his actions that night. Wills ultimately died in abject poverty. USA, USA, USA!

American hero Frank Wills in better times

On June 17, 2026, we are trying desperately to remember the good old days when we all thought Nixon was the worst thing we had ever seen.

How quaint.

Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Broken Noise – Story Of The Weak

Baby Donny’s Security Blanket

June 17, 2026

How is it possible for someone to become president of the United States and still be a giant loser and a great big baby? Only one man (hopefully) could pull off such an unlikely feat. Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump has a particular set of skills, and those unusual skills (that was not a compliment) have in more recent times been augmented by the late-stage syphilis and/or dementia that is munching away at a brain that was never really all that functional to begin with. The only parts of Trump’s “very, very large uh-brain” that ever actually accomplished anything were those tasked with lying, cheating, raping, bullying, stealing, racism, narcissism, vengeance, stunning ignorance and outright disdain for anyone who happened to be not Donald Trump.

Lately, Trump has been very busy punching himself in the face, while many courts (with the blatant and stunning exception of the Supreme one) have taken to kicking him in the proverbial balls.

Most notable of late was the demand to have Trump’s disgraced name removed from the John F. Kennedy Memorial Center for the Performing Arts, where it was installed illegally some months ago. Only Congress can change its name.

Trump’s particular set of skills do not in any way include the ability to admit mistakes – this is understandable due to the almost infinite number of them. Also missing is any ability to hold his fake-haired, Crayola-colored head high under duress.

To that end, Baby Don felt the need to hide his shame and defeat* behind a giant tarp as his reviled, unwelcome, illegally-placed name was removed from the Kennedy Center. Though the court says Trump’s name is gone, his blankey remains in place to this day hiding his shame , three days after the façade was returned to its rightful owner.

The still-tarped Kennedy Center

Death-To-America Don also continues to hide his “very powerful document” that he totally wants “to be released, so probably pretty soon”**, with which he is desperately trying to 1) weasel out of his disastrous war-of-choice-that-he-lost with Iran, and 2) get within a thousand miles of the deal Obama painstakingly worked out (without stupidly going to war) with Iran in 2015. Remember, this is still merely a concept of a peace deal, which Trump could easily fuck up within the two-month grace period before any peace deal is finalized.

Not to mention the continuing, never-ending, massive cover-up of the

Donald Trump Memorial Epstein Files

which have Trump’s name all over them. I don’t get it. Donny Dearest loves having his name all over the fucking place. What gives?

_______________________________________________
*Albeit mostly symbolic though legitimately satisfying.
**So, what, in like two weeks?

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

Thank you for your attention to this meathead.

Pic Of The Day – Hail Sleazer

The Emperor Has No (Fill In The Blank)   

June 15, 2026

In Lieu Of A Thousand Words

Yesterday, Darnold Trump, in his latest ploy to bilk his negative-IQ-score minions out of whatever pittance they have left after Dear Leader’s financial fricasseeing of all non-billionaires, staged a bloody fighting event on our South Lawn. Many people are saying he did this because after his other bloody event – the coup he incited on January 6, 2021 – he did not emerge victorious. Now he can emerge vicarious.

Emperor Zero Neato weighs in at his birthday c(arn)age event

Hopefully you were able to enjoy Donny’s big, beautiful birthday…it could be his last. If not, it could be ours.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Pic Of The Day.