(No) Family (In) Court

W(her)e Are Family

May 6, 2024

No one is showing up to show support for defendant of the decade Donald Trump. Despite begging his supporters to show up in droves outside every courthouse in America, they aren’t even showing up at the courthouse Trump now inhabits most of the week. Not one family member, not even the wife he cheated on to make this trying trial possible, showed during the week of jury selection or the first week of testimony.

To be fair, one devoted MAGAt dipshit did show up outside the NY courthouse

Trump is so desperate to have someone from his family appear to support him by showing up at court, he is having Ivana exhumed to have her coffin by his side as we watch the life drained from him, day after day. With any luck we will also see his freedom remanded to the prison system and his attempt to become the first American fascist dictator end up like a crash test dummy in a Ford Pinto.

Melania has been very busy doing…things or she would definitely be here. She knows I would never cheat on her or lie about cheating on her. I don’t know why I would. Most of my time since Sleepy Joe Biden stole the election from me is spent reading the many bibles I have all over my house.  My beloved first wife Ivana, who I so lovingly had buried at one of my beautiful golf courses – definitely not for the tax break, and then let her gravesite turn to shit, would have wanted to be by my side while Sleepy Joe Biden attacked me through his totally corrupt court system. Biden's evil plan to force me to sleep sitting up in a freezing room full of corrupt judges, lawyers and fake jurors will never work. I will never surrender. I will never be defeated. Ivana still loves me so much. I only had to divorce her because I was cheating on her with Marla Maples, who I cheated on with Melania, who I cheated on with Karen McDougal and Stormy Daniels, which I never did. I have no idea why Michael Cohen paid them off. I did nothing wrong. Believe me. Women just love me, what can I do.

Ivana’s gravesite then and now, because he cares so much

Perhaps in an attempt to dissuade Dear Old Dad from dredging up his first wife, or perhaps in a desperate attempt get noticed by his uncaring father and maybe find himself back in daddy’s will, middle son Eric made a better-late-than-never appearance during week three of Donald’s current trial. More likely, Eric was paid by his father, via a third party no doubt, to show up. Presumably (i.e., almost definitely) Donald begged someone (preferably Ivanka), anyone to make it look like his family gave even a rabbit-pellet-sized shit about their asshole father.

I. Mangrey reporting. With family and friends at my side.