Re-Fuck Joe Manchin
September 25, 2021
Joe Manchin is up to his beady little
eyeballs in coal
money. He
is just another greedy
motherfucker, the poster bitch for Big Coal and the
fossil fuel industry in general. Manchin could be chopped up (not saying he
should be; that would be inappropriate – almost as inappropriate as Manchin
scuttling the agenda for which Joe Biden, and not Joe Manchin, was
overwhelmingly elected president of the United States) and used by Santa as
stocking stuffers for the naughty kids on his list. This is somewhat
understandable, him being from West Virginia and all.
Manchin is like the sleazy pusher in the
schoolyard, hawking another addictive, deadly, black substance – heroin. Manchin’s
heroin and heroine is coal. He is addicted. He is a dickhead. At this point
everyone knows that switching over to renewable energy sources protects our air,
water, and very survival, while simultaneously stimulating the economy. Yes,
some will have to transition away from occupations that are killing the planet
(and them). Any short-term financial trauma that may be incurred by regular
working folk during the transition could be easily offset by reversing the
wholly unnecessary and insane Turmp tax cut for the wealthiest among us, and using
that money for niceness instead of evil. Rather than telling his constituents
that it is time for them to learn another trade – one that doesn’t destroy
their lungs, or get them buried alive in a mine collapse – he tosses them under
the coal car saying, “Keep doing what you’re doing fellas. You’ll love it. It’s
a way of life.” Oh right, Manchin is different; he wears a suit and tie.
Maybe I forgot, maybe I never knew, maybe I
blocked it out in order to preserve what little sanity and peace of mind I
still possess. Joe Manchurian is the chairman of the Senate Committee on Energy
and Natural Resources. That’s like having the fossil fuel industry writing our
laws on environmental policy…oh, wait, that’s been going on forever. Even after
research funded by Exxon and others found incontrovertible evidence that fossil
fuels would be the death of us all, something they knew full well in the 1970s.
Manchin is a human IED designed to take out the planet. We’d be better off
putting a giant asteroid hurtling inexorably toward the Earth in charge of
environmental protection.
Manchin is vehemently if not in fact
violently opposed to protecting the environment. This fucker had a campaign ad
with him shooting up progressive environmental legislation.
Even as China claims to be checking into
rehab to get off the stuff, Coal Manchin is hell-bent on keeping the dirtiest
fossil fuel of them all on life support despite every doctor, nurse, anyone who
dares to peek into the patient’s room in the ICU, is certain that Old King
Coal, if left to its own devices, is good as dead. Although, completely dead
would be so much better.
Maybe Interior Secretary Deb Haaland, whose
family has been here for 35 generations, can take Black-Lung Joe out behind the
solar shed and teach him a lesson.
I. Mangrey recycling.
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