Trials And Tribulations

Cheat, Prey, Lose

August 29, 2023

Don Trump is up to his racoon-esque eyeballs in legal jeopardy for the last few years of a lifetime of amoral, despicable and criminal behavior. Many people are saying it’s about fucking time. Despite four indictments covering 91 separate charges, Trump insists he did nothing wrong, continues yelling witch hunt, and otherwise maintains his usual “sunny” public persona.

The other thing this bull-goose grifter is maintaining is his relentless plea for money from people who idolize him. Trump has more money (allegedly) than all of them put together and he would never let any of them set foot in one of his gaudy golf resorts because he thinks they are loser scum. Trump’s most recent merch campaign is selling his marks everything you can think of with his fucking mug-shot plastered on it – word on the street is a bobble-head is in the works and there is a strong possibility that the bobble-head will be the eventual Fascist Party nominee.

Shameless product placement for a must-read new book on the life and crimes of Donald Junta Trump:

From the people who brought you

Trump went into his Fulton County booking last week claiming he was proud of his latest indictment. Hopefully, he will be even prouder of his conviction(s). They should be worth a fortune…if his rubes have any money left to throw away.

Oh, What A Beautiful Mourning

Trump’s final chief of staff Mark Meadows is busy sweating mortar rounds and shitting bricks. Meadows is also up to his beady little eyeballs in legal jeopardy for his extensive role in aiding and abetting Trump's Keystone Coup. Trump's right-hand doofus is looking at some undesirable jail time. 

Meadows attempting a Vulcan mind-meld on himself

to see if there is any brain activity.

Meadows is not a Vulcan; he is barely a mammal

What she said

I. Mangrey reporting with some degree of glee.

Broken News - GQP Primary Debase

A Devastating Eight-Clown Pile-Up

August 28, 2023

During their recent Fascist (nee Republican) Party debate, almost all candidates running against soon-to-be-convicted-felon Donald Junta Trump said they would still vote for him even after being found guilty of any or all of the 91 separate charges, across four different jurisdictions, against him.

The moderator asked the group to raise their hands if they would still support Trump if convicted. Here’s what happened next:

Raise your hand if you want a convicted insurrectionist to be our next president

Current second place fascist Ron DuhSantis looked to see what everyone else on the stage was doing, then tepidly raised his hand. No one had their hand held higher than fake candidate Vivek Ramasmarmy, who appears to be part laughing hyena. Chris Christie has been mercilessly bashing the Orange Ogre throughout the early stages of the primary, but Christie’s brain forgot to tell his hand not to leap into the air at that moment. Best of all was uber loser Mike Pence, who Trump’s supporters wanted to hang on January 6, 2021 as Pence ran and hid for his life during his boss’s attempted coup/murder plot. There’s stupid, and then there’s stupid. And pathetic. And cultist.

Surging suck-up Ramasmarmy managed to pull his head out of Trump’s butt (fortunately, Trump wasn’t there** or this could have been more than merely figurative) long enough to dicksplain the burgeoning climate crisis to the feeble-minded Fux audience and anyone else foolish or unfortunate enough to watch this eight-clown pile-up:

“I'm the only candidate on stage who isn't bought and paid for,* so I can say this. Climate change is a hoax. The reality is more people are dying of bad climate change policies than they are of actual climate change.”

Ramasmarmy had previously referred to a statement by progressive Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D-MA) by saying “These are the words of the modern grand wizards of the modern KKK.” First of all, even the modern KKK is not accepting Black women into its ranks, let alone as grand wizard. Pressley is black, Ramasmarmy, who also called Juneteenth a “useless” holiday, is reptilian. 

Ramasmarmy’s most recent moment in the scum had him on Meat The Press blaming “a new wave of anti-Black and anti-Hispanic racism as a consequence of the so-called anti-racist movement.” I’ll let his bile speak for itself on this one.

The rest of the evening, so I hear, was filled with the blinkered Philistine pig-ignorance we’ve come to expect from these non-creative garbage. Oh, and heapin’ helpin’ of the usual lying, fascist bullshit.

__________________________________________________
*Just what this country needs, another narcissistic, autocratic-minded mega-millionaire who thinks he knows everything.
**Trump thought his time would be better spent in mutual-masturbation with Fucker Carlson on the failing social media platform formerly known as Twitter.

I. Mangrey recovering.

Broken News - Stop The Bail

Stop The Squeal

August 26, 2023

Donald Junta Trump continues his inexorable descent, this time sans escalator, as celebrated in song on our Grammy-ignored “tribute” to the Trump debacle, Stairway To Prison…

And now, a few words about Don Trump’s weekly indictment/arrest. His latest come-to-justice moment, in case you missed it, took place at the Fulton County Jail in Atlanta, Georgia at the behest of District Attorney Fani Willis, who has been building a bigly case against defendant Trump and his band of treacherous cretins who attempted by various means to overturn Joe Biden’s super clean electoral victory in the Peach State. Ironically, Trump has gone to great lengths to not only steal Georgia’s election, but to defame the color peach by coloring himself from chin to split ends in that hue, or something like it.

For some strange reason, Trump and all his demented devotees have managed to turn themselves in before the Georgia deadline. Unfortunately, this means that we will not be treated to election-criminal-mastermind John Eastman being escorted out of his home in his underwear for a second time. All of these fuckers should be held until trial. Maybe this would get them to stop stalling. The American people have a right to a speedy trial.

One big, crappy crime family of the best people – The Fulton County 19 in all their gory:

some smiles, some grimaces, some serial-killer-glowers

For his part, Trump sees his arrest as just another fundraising opportunity. There is already a collection of loser merch designed to appeal to the mentally-challenged, financially-deprived (yet willing to cough up their money to fund a guy who brags about how rich he is - do they actually know he's lying?) MAGAt crowd. Trump will not be satisfied until he bleeds each and every one of his pathetic cult followers dry. Rumor has it that Trump is in the process of getting his properties out of his name and into Don, Jr.’s to avoid losing them when he skips bail, or gets fined to death. It seems this rumor may have been debunked, but given the current climate – due in no small part to the actions of Trump the elder – this is insufficient reason to cease flogging the story. Just in case.

For the record, I’m willing to bet that should the Teflon Troll manage to slither out of justice’s grasp, there will be a great gnashing of teeth, and angst and despair. There will not however be an assault on the Capitol, the courthouse, or Mor-on-Lago. Should justice in fact be served, you can bet someone undeserving will wind up dead.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled dancing in the streets.

Lout On Bail

Now, Here It Is – Your Moment Of Schadenfreude…

August 25, 2023

Disgraced, twice-impeached, four-time-indicted (so far), failed insurrection leader and Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president, self-proclaimed “king of bankruptcy” and current King of Indictments Donald Trump was proudly arrested, fingerprinted and mug shot yesterday. The world’s largest weasel feigned strength and pride prior to turning himself in to authorities. He pretends to be a patriotic martyr. He is a rebel without a brain. His patriotism is right up there with Jefferson Davis.

“NOBODY HAS EVER FOUGHT FOR [i.e., against] ELECTION INTEGRITY LIKE PRESIDENT DONALD J. TRUMP. FOR DOING SO, I WILL PROUDLY BE ARRESTED TOMORROW AFTERNOON IN GEORGIA. GOD BLESS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA!!!”

As always, every word from Donald is based either on lies, misinformation or delusions.

Driving Mr. Crazy

OJ Simpson drove his white SUV in slow motion as he tried to avoid being booked for murder. Donald Trump exited his private jet, oozed into one of a dozen or so black SUVs, which proceeded at OJ speed toward the Fulton County Jail, unable to avoid being booked for dozens of crimes.

Fulton County inmate #PO1135809

Pretty tough looking for a guy who, as this mug shot was

being taken surely had a very full diaper

One assumes that the alleged criminal above thinks he is intimidating everyone with his very stern look. Looking forward to see how that turns out. As nauseating as this image is, it is comforting to know that it is, in fact and for all time, a mug-shot. I'm sure he's very proud of himself. So was Charles Manson.

Apparently, Fulton County does not have a scale capable of providing an accurate measure of Trump’s mass. The weight reported after his processing was the same fictitious number to which we have groan (yeah, I know, but it sounds the same and feels better) accustomed.

Next stop…

Can well-placed electricity create a brain in a vacuum?

I. Mangrey reveling.

Thought For The Day - Run Donald Run

Yer outta heeeere!!

Love It And Leave It

June 29, 2023 August 23, 2023

I wrote this, as often happens, to keep for a non-araign-y day, when not much was happening, but there hasn’t been such a day for a while, so it sat, waiting for an opening that never came. That is, until Trump made it all but meaningless, but unwilling to let it go to waste, I deliver it now, with Trump’s addendum.

If disgraced, twice-impeached, twice-indicted (so far)*, failed insurrection leader and Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president Donald Trump gave even a fraction of a shit about this country he would, what's the phrase Ratpublicans used to use, ah yes - self-deport.

I hear western Russia is nice this time of year. If that’s too hot, there’s always Siberia. Then again, Putin would have no use for Trump if Dosvedonald was in Russia. Then Vlad would know how we feel.

Trump, ready to move in for the kill…

I mean kiss

Then, this happened just the other day, shortly after describing himself as the “apple of [Putin’s] eye;” Deadbeat Donny had to put up bail to the tune of $200,000 (a bargain by all accounts, given the circumstances) and have spelled out for him the do-not-do list required to stay out on bail…

“I assume, therefore, that she thought I was a ‘flight’ risk - I'd fly far away, maybe to Russia, Russia, Russia, share a gold domed suite with Vladimir, never to be seen or heard from again. Would I be able to take my very ‘understated’ airplane with the gold TRUMP affixed for all to see. Probably not, I'd be much better off flying commercial – I'm sure nobody would recognize me!”

First of all, what a douchebag.

But we knew that.

And it’s probably not too smart to threaten (Yeah, he says he’s joking, but we’ve heard that one before) to flee the country you grabbed by the pussy, while you’re (undeservedly) out on bail under four indictments totaling 91 separate charges, many of which are pretty fucking serious.

But we knew that.

Or…

I hear Elba is lovely this time of year

______________________________________________________
*That’s how long ago this was written – two indictments ago.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

What do you think?

Armageddon Intelligence

What Came Around Stuck Around

August 20, 2023

As MSNBC’s Ari Melber put it, “One of the risks, right now, is how AI can mimic parts of human activity without any of the possible ethics, emotion, or humanity of a human.” I wholeheartedly agree that this should concern us, starting right now. Given our track record with handling technology, particularly the way in which we completely ignore any possible long-term consequences of our actions, we should at least attempt to be vigilant as AI (which in four months went from failing the bar exam to surpassing most humans while passing the bar) “matures,” learns and begins to take matters into its own hands.

For some reason, someone used AI to create this image...

or did AI do this of its own accord

However, Melber’s caveat above, that AI “can mimic parts of human activity without any of the possible ethics, emotion, or humanity of a human,” sounded oddly familiar to something that has long been with us, long before we even heard of, or even imagined AI. This type of behavior sounds exactly the same as the Fascist (nee Republican) Party platform of the last several decades. Even more so since the Orange Gasbag descended his golden escalator and treated America to a golden shower while escorting this nation via the express lane into any number of Dante’s circles of Hell.

Marks The Plot

As if this whole thing wasn’t scary enough on its face, donors to one of the most high-profile AI corporations include the likes of Microsoft, and fascist loonies Elon Musk and Peter Thiel (Musk’s PayPal co-founder, and current Ayn Randian-style libertarian).

Musk recently claimed global philanthropist George Soros “hates humanity.”* Besides diving into the anti-Semitism deep end, while Soros spends his charitable dollars to bolster democracies across the globe, Musk backs hate speech and disinformation on his new toy, which he brilliantly renamed ‘X’ (which ranks 15^th among the top 15 social media sites). Musk is now in bed with Ron DuhSantis, the new, soon-to-be-failed Fascist Party challenger to presumptive Fascist Party nominee and cult leader Donald Trump. 

As if Musk hasn’t lost enough money on his foolish purchase of the cesspool formerly known as Twitter – now with more anti-Semitism and other hate speech since changing hands – some advertisers are abandoning shit due to the risk of suffering guilt by association after their ads appeared alongside pro-Nazi groups content.

Yes, Musk’s side hustle is electric vehicles, which is on balance a good thing for the environment. Unfortunately, the South African native has increasingly turned his attention to greed, hate and power über alles, you know, fascism. And he has of late shown utter distain for the environment when it comes to cleaning up messes his projects create.

_____________________________________________________
*Probably at least in part because Soros dumped his Tesla stock, but mostly because Musk is morally and socially defective.

I. Mangrey, intelligence officer.

Rewriting And Rewronging History

August 17, 2023

We are living through, at this very moment, what will one day be called history. Many pundits claim, likely with good reason, that this is a particularly pungent time what with our immediate past president being indicted (or indicated according to one of his recent covfefe-addled online hissy fits) four times and all.

As we attempt to extricate ourselves from Trump’s Keystone Coup Plotters and the subsequent legal battles, replete with mob-boss-like death threats to prosecutors, judges, jurists and witnesses let’s take a quick, albeit nauseating, look at the history of history. 

Another perfect phone call from a kleptocratic kook

It is said that history is written by the victors. Unfortunately, what goes unsaid is that those victors are often big losers when seen from different perspectives. Also, some victories are more enduring than others.

Much of what passes for the history of the United States is horribly flawed – both the actual history and too much of what we are taught of it in school, not to mention much of what we are told in real time. As if the victors’ version of our history wasn’t wrong enough, fascists like Ron DuhSantis are feverishly attempting to re-wrong many important aspects of the American story.

DuhSantis has been busy doubling and tripling down on his disgraceful, racist, borderline insane insistence that Black people benefitted from being enslaved by learning skills they were able to translate into financial independence once slavery was outlawed in America.

Even if that was true, who gives a fuck? Would you want to go through being whipped, raped, tortured or killed just to learn a skill? I believe that traditional apprenticeships would have been much better ways to learn skills. But what do I know? Plus, being dead sort of makes the acquisition of any skill kind of a moot point going forward.

Thriving While Black

And when on June 1, 1921 a town full of Black folks in the Greenwood district of Tulsa, Oklahoma who not only survived slavery, but thrived to the point that their neighborhood became known as Black Wall Street, what do you think happened? You guessed it, the town was attacked on the ground, bombed from the air, and eliminated from the map by a bunch of psycho White people. Up to 300 dead of the town’s residents were killed during the attack. Some 10,000 were rendered homeless while 35 blocks were destroyed. No one was ever charged.

Why? Because thriving while Black.

Black Wall Street before and after the race massacre

You may have also guessed that more than 100 years later some pathetic White people are hurling alternative facts, implying that the Tulsa race massacre had nothing to do with race. So it goes.

I. Mangrey remembering and reminding.                                                                 

                                                                                                          

Timely Summer Rerun

Stocking Up

August 15, 2023

Another day, another indictment – well, 10 indictments – involving disgraced, twice-impeached, now-four-time-indicted (so far), failed insurrection leader and Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president (and ostensible rapist) Donald Jinglebell Trump. Last night, a Georgia grand jury voted in favor of a plethora of indictments on racketeering/election interference charges against Trump, et al. Hardly worth mentioning at this point, but there we are. This is history in the breaking.

Donald Trump is the only president to have been indicted. He is the only one indicted four times. And he did it all in one year. The total number of indictments of all other presidents combined, covering all of American history, is exactly zero.

But we have more important issues to consider at this moment.

Being in a rather lazy mood, or maybe it’s more burnout than anything else, the gang here at Paying Attention™ agreed it would be best to wander aimlessly down memory lane as we celebrate another favorite August holiday around here. If nothing else, may we recommend cranking up a few of the tunes featured below. 

Whatever you decide, Happy Birthday Woodstock.

When Boomers Roamed the Earth

August 15, 2019

Max Yasgur was an upstate New York farmer and the largest milk producer in Sullivan County, New York in 1969.  Yasgur was a Republican who supported the Vietnam War, but he went against the wishes of his sleepy rural community of Bethel, and rented out his farm for a weekend music festival in August of 1969, thinking it would be good for the local economy and would help bridge the contentious generation gap. 

What could be so bad about having a few thousand kids listen to music in the fresh air for a few days?  Though the local folks for the most part wanted nothing to do with a bunch of hippies coming anywhere near their peaceful environs, no one imagined the size of the crowd or the ultimate notoriety of what was about to.  It was like an invasion, a caravan if you will, of unfamiliar outsiders, whose differences frightened these simple people.  In the end, it was, as Max Yasgur would tell the crowd on his farm, “three days of fun and music, and nothing but fun and music” that rocked the world.  Literally and figuratively.

I did not make it to Woodstock.  I really wanted to go, but I was not of driving age and my parents would not let me.  Especially now that I have fewer days to look forward to than the number I have already seen, I cannot blame them. 

I did see the movie the moment it came out because I was not willing to wait for it to come out on Netflix.  And I played the album many times on my cheapo turntable which I foolishly set up on my suburban back lawn (Surprisingly, that album still plays almost perfectly).  Since then, I have been a bit obsessed with what many have called “three days that defined a generation.”

The Woodstock Music and Art Festival began on this day 50 years ago.  The line-up of musicians was and is legendary, if not unequaled.  From Richie Havens to Ravi Shankar, from Janis to Jimi, The Who, Santana, Sly & the Family Stone, Joe Cocker, Joan Baez, Creedence, the Dead, CSNY, Country Joe and many others.

Here are a few of my (many) favorite performances.  I'll probably throw a few more choice tunes on here over the next couple days.

Richie Havens – Freedom

John Sebastian – I Had a Dream

Max Yasgur

The Ultimate Star Spangled Banner

It is said, “If you can remember Woodstock, you weren’t there.” 

I. Mangrey reminiscing.  I remember Woodstock.

SPECIAL BONUS TRACK

Country Joe & The Fish

Thought For The Day

Let It Be

August 13, 2023

Drastic measures are being put in place as the Fulton County, Georgia where disgraced, twice-impeached, thrice-indicted (so far), failed insurrection leader and Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president, and now professional defendant Donald Trump may be facing yet another indictment.

Officials are taking every precaution to avoid putting Trump in harm’s way. Are you fucking kidding me? Donald Trump is harm’s way personified – with fake hair, and in an ill-fitting suit.

I say we take our chances. No need to worry about him. He has the survival instincts of a cockroach. Besides, all the nutjobs with guns and violent tendencies are HIS people.

Gregor Trump

The rest of us, particularly anyone involved in holding King Cockroach to account for any aspect of his life of crime, need to be protected from him. After all, Hannibal Lecter was not locked up for his own good.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

What do you think?

Happy Thought For The Day

 

Section 3 of the 14^th Amendment

August 12, 2023

The Federalist Society touts itself as the end-all-be-all of constitutional scholarshit…I mean, scholarship…no, I take that back, I mean scholarshit. They claim that their raison d’être is to provide us with the original intent of the wealthy white Christian men who fashioned the U.S. Constitution. They insist that they, and they alone know what the Founders meant with each and every word of our nation’s mission statement.

Never mind that there have been more than two dozen amendments added over the years. Never mind that the Founders themselves were often of two (or more) minds, and argued vigorously – often in a public house, or pub as now known – before during and after drafting one of humanity’s great documents. And never mind that at least some of them – slave owner/fucker and major contributor Thomas Jefferson leaps to mind – believed that the document should be flexible and revisited in order to respond to the times, which were likely to change from time to time.

Did these modern-day soothsayers of our Constitution have a Ouija Board? Did they consult a medium? Hold a séance? Did they drive their Delorean back to 1776 and commune with the Constitutional Convention?

My guess is no. My guess is they are full of themselves and full of shit. Think Neil Gorsuch, Brett Kavanaugh, Amy Coney Barrett, Antonin Scalia (still dead), Clarence Thomas and Samuel Alito. Current Chief Justice John Roberts denies being a member, and you take that to the bank…the river bank that is. The list of major donors to the Federalist Society reads like a who’s who of what the fuck.

All that being said, it appears that – likely for the first time – this allegedly august body has produced something of actual value to American democracy and constitutional thought. Two respected, active members of this generally delusional, self-aggrandizing cult have just published a 126-page University of Pennsylvania Law Review paper that should turn some heads and shut some mouths – especially one very big, perpetually-open one that speaks in all caps. These two highly-credentialed conservative constitutional law professors say the U.S. Constitution already “disqualifies former President Donald Trump” from holding any office because of his “participation in the attempted overthrow of the 2020 presidential election.”

They write: “Section Three remains an enforceable part of the Constitution, not limited to the Civil War, and not effectively repealed by nineteenth century amnesty legislation.”

According to The New York Times, “Steven G. Calabresi, a law professor at Northwestern and Yale and a founder of the Federalist Society “called the article ‘a tour de force.’”

According to watchdog organization Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington (CREW), who were quoted in the article, “Section 3’s text and historical applications make clear that a criminal charge or conviction is not necessary for a person to be adjudged disqualified.”

Calabresi also told The Times, “Trump is ineligible to be on the ballot, and each of the 50 state secretaries of state has an obligation to print ballots without his name on them,” adding, “they may be sued for refusing to do so.”

I rest their case.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Happy Thought For The Day.

What do you think?

Schmuck For The Day

How Many Times Can Irony Be Killed?

August 11, 2023

Isn’t It Rich

Alberto Gonzales, Ex-pathetic lackey/Attorney General/apologist under Supreme-Court-appointed-president George WTF Bush, slithered out from under his rock to pretend to be a serious person with something to add to the current dialogue. 

Gonzales has apparently forgotten that his ex-boss oversaw the completely illegal (and based on nothing but transparent lies) invasion of Iraq, and implemented what was euphemistically described as “enhanced interrogation techniques,” better known to those of us who might wear tennis shoes, or an occasional python boot, as torture. Gonzales seems also to have forgotten that he himself authored a memo that helped rationalize the illegal torturing prisoners.

Albozo Gonzales seen here with his equally buffoonish boss George WTF Bush

Albozo wrote an irony-murdering op ed in the Washington Post. it said in part, “If we decide that presidents should never be charged with crimes after they leave office for actions committed in office, we are no longer a democracy.” 

Check please!

Albozo continued, “The rule of law is the glue that holds our country together. If we are to survive as a democracy, we must continue to respect and protect it.” So when will he be turning himself in to face justice for your crimes? He might want to invest in a mirror.

With all due respect, go to hell you hypocritical dweeb.

Barbara Streisand – Send In The Clowns

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck For The Day.                             

                                                                                                

Paying Attention™ Sing-a-Long

August 10, 2023

Hope your Resignation Day(s) holiday provided a pause in the disaster. Now, it’s back into the present-day fray, though the muse has found a way to hold sway. Here’s a delightful little ditty to help lighten another day in Babylon.

Sing little chickadees…

“You’re Fired” And Arraign

Just yesterday mornin', they let me know he was toast

Jack Smith, the plans you made put a hurt on him

I walked out this morning with a smile and a whim

Watching this all unfold has me so engrossed.

 

I’ve seen “You’re fired” and I’ve seen arraign,

I’ve seen stupid shit that I thought would never end.

I’ve seen incel freaks who just could not buy a friend,

But I always feared Trump would fuck us again.

 

Won't you look down upon us, Jack Smith?

You've got to help us make a stand.

You've just got to put this fuckin’ creep away.

My brain is hurting for my only homeland,

And I won't make it if Trump’s here to stay.

 

Oh, I've seen fire and I've seen rain

I’ve seen “You’re fired” and I’ve seen arraign

I’ve seen stupid shit that I thought would never end

I’ve seen incel freaks who just could not buy a friend

But I always feared Trump would fuck us again

Been scratchin’ my head as I wonder why

We can’t lock up this scum.

Lord knows, everything he does

Makes your head just spin around.

Well, he won’t shut up, ev’ry word is a lie,

He’s just a psychotic bum,

Reality and democracy in pieces on the ground.

 

I’ve seen “You’re fired” and I’ve seen arraign

I’ve seen stupid shit that I thought would never end

I’ve seen incel freaks who just could not buy a friend

But I always feared Trump would fuck us again

 

One more time again, now

Knew he’d fuck us one more time again

Just can’t stop himself from fuckin’ around, now

Knew he’d fuck us, knew he’d fuck us, fired and arraign, now

 

And now, we’ll open up the request line.