Wednesday, May 4, 2022

Schmuck For The Day

Susan “Back-Alley” Collins

May 04, 2022

On the dog-doo-encrusted heels of the newly leaked draft opinion (written by lying sack of shit Samuel Alito) exposing the scofflaw Extreme Court’s intention to nullify the settled law of Roe v. Wade, I've seen a slew of articles implying that Susan Collins was “played” by Brett “Boofing Is Fun For The Whole Family” Kavanaugh when she interviewed him to help him become a Supreme Court Clown/Justice and fulfill Ratpublicans’ crusade to overturn Roe v. Wade.

See if you can identify the justices who plan make abortion illegal

Collins was not played. She was playing along. After all, how could Collins not have known what so many of us found to be beyond obvious, that a beer-obsessed, credibly-accused sexual assaulter like Kavanaugh would unhesitatingly lie to her face? Fuck Susan Collins and anyone who even entertains the idea that maybe a woman should be in control of her own body, yet still voted for Collins - the Stain From Maine.

Is Being Stupid A Choice?

Collins willfully aided and abetted the construction of the super-stupid majority in the Court, voting to confirm nominees to the highest court who she knew full well were chosen by the Federalist Society for their obsession with killing Roe v. Wade, along with countless women who will be forced to die in order to save their unborn. And for their insistence that women (and girls) who were raped, even by family members, should, under rule of law, carry those pregnancies to term as life-long, unrelenting reminders of the most horrific moments of their lives, until the day they die. You know because, as a number of Ratpublican men have mused, they should just make the most of the gift that God (and the rapist) gave them.

Make no mistake. This is just the tip of the shitberg. There are plenty more rights like abortion that are not spelled out in the Constitution. Like privacy, same-sex marriage, contraception, and who knows what other rights we take for granted that these Cro-Magnon men of the radical-right are waiting to pull out of their fat white asses.

I am not saying the following to be rude or mean, just accurate. Susan Collins is one dumb fuck. And her compatriot Lisa Murkowski is not the brightest fuck either. Both of these alleged moderates are culpable and will have the blood of women on their hands.

Sometimes the road to hell is paved with bad intentions.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck For The Day.

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Who is your schmuck for the day?

Monday, May 2, 2022

Thought For The Day

Their Old Kentucky Home

May 2, 2022

Kentucky senator and WAP (White-Ass Pussy) Rand Paul was recently mentioned in this space. First, we apologize for this. Senator Paul himself should apologize for ever opening the exhaust hole under his nose.

The junior GOPP (Grand Old Putin Party) senator from the state that continues to bring us Bitch McConnell attempted to school Secretary of State Antony Blinken on reasons we should not be interfering with the malignant mischief of Vladimir Putin. Paul attempted to justify Putin’s brutal bludgeoning of Ukraine by proclaiming, “You could also argue the countries they attacked were part of Russia. Were part of the Soviet Union.”

Someone should remind the simpleton from the southeast that Kentucky was home to tribes from five different culture groups – Iroquoian, Sioux, Algonquian, Muskogean and Yuchi. None of these peoples invited Paul’s pasty-faced predecessors to evict them. So maybe he should let them do as they please and reclaim what is rightfully theirs. Works for me.

Senator Paul might want to STFU.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

You're welcome.

What is your thought for the day?

Thursday, April 28, 2022

Broken News

Greedy With A Chance Of Assholes

April 28, 2022

If you do not know what an NFT is, I envy you. NFT – Non-Fungible Token. I had never heard of, nor imagined anything dumber. With the possible exception of Rand Paul. An NFT is a non-interchangeable unit of data stored on a blockchain, a form of digital ledger, that can be sold and traded. People decided they would buy these non-existent “things” for lots of money (which of course is also not real, but has a much more universal agreement as to its value – for better or worse) and then, after waiting for several minutes, or perhaps even weeks, would sell these non-existent tokens of stupidity, presumably for some huge digital profit. This of course assumes that the digital money continues to have value.

CryptoPunk 7804

I do not own the above masterful work of digital art. I am just borrowing it from whatever numb-nuts paid what was described as “the equivalent of about $7.6M” to own it. Whatever the fuck that is. If only I had the original, whatever the fuck that is. Am I jealous? Sure. Whatever.

Twitter founder Jack Dorsey’s first-ever tweet

Iranian-born crypto entrepreneur Sina Estavi purchased the NFT above for $2.9M in March 2021. He recently announced on Twitter that he planned to sell the Non-Fortuitous Trash, and pledged 50% of its proceeds (which he thought would exceed $25 million) to charity. Yeah, sure. Turns out the high bid was just under $280. No doubt charities are falling all over themselves to garner this unprecedented windfall. Or not. 

No Fucking Thanks

Speaking of Twitter, Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla, major embarrassment to the Asperger’s community, and voted the man most in need of shutting the fuck up, is poised to buy Twitter for $44B. Musk insists his goal is to make free speech great again by letting dangerous dipshits everywhere to spew their bilious rhetoric with impunity. Musk himself has been know to tweet “fire” in the crowded Twitterverse from time to time. When he’s not busy just being a major douchebag in the analogue world. His cars are cool, his recyclable rocket is great. One must wonder why Fucker Carlson and every other right-wing fuckwit is cheering Musk’s takeover of Tweetville. Maybe Elon will end up just getting too stoned to even remember he owns the social media juggernaut.

Disgraced, twice-impeached, two-time-popular-vote-losing, one-term, seditious, ex-president and failed blogger Donald Tmurp has said he will not return to Twitter, which banned him after he planned and incited the January 6 insurrection. I give him about 30 seconds of protest once Musk allows him back on the putrid platform. That will be about 10 seconds after his pathetic knock-off – TRUTH Social (two words Tmurp can barely spell let alone identify with) – disappears in a puff of digital smoke.


This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled not-forgotten tsuris.

Friday, April 22, 2022

Earth For The Day

It’s My Planet And I’ll Cry If I Want To

April 22, 2022

I know I have a tendency to go on about the Earth and the environment all the time, don’t ask me why. I just have this hunch that they may come in handy one day.

Everyone here at Paying Attention is still reeling from the passing of our good friend and founder Steve Gallop’s father Herb who was laid to rest yesterday, in what many people are describing as the only funeral to feature a sing-a-long. So in lieu of pithy pronouncements, angst-ridden assessments and comical caterwauling, we can only provide you with some terrifying links to hint at the hoaxiness of the so-called climate crisis that threatens the very Earth that now holds Herb Gallop for as long as people like you and me can keep denialists from trashing the place beyond recognition.

We hope to be back at our regular rocking, rolling and ranting in the very near future.

https://www.alternet.org/2021/12/climate-crisis/

https://www.alternet.org/2022/03/humans-have-become-armageddon-makers/

https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-features/doomsday-glacier-thwaites-antarctica-climate-crisis-1273841/

https://crooksandliars.com/2022/01/you-wont-believe-who-virginias-natural

Sorry To Be The Bearer Of Good News…

https://edition.cnn.com/2022/01/14/business/india-reliance-gujarat-green-energy-investment-intl-hnk/index.html


Actual transcript from 1983. 39 years ago. In people years.

In case you can’t read the fine print above, the 1983 NOVA program was entitled The Climate Crisis. So this hoax goes back even farther the Tmurp 2020 Great Election Hoax or Qanon’s infamous Ping Pong Pizzagate, or Qanon itself. Or the 2017 Inauguration-Crowd Fairy Tale, or even the very fake presidential campaign of 2016 that ended with Donald Tmurp in the real White House.

Good thing this climate crisis is a hoax. Can you imagine how bad things would be if it was real?

So stand back and stand by to see how quickly the Ratpublican/Fux News machine can put a stop to this rogue planet once and for all.

We live in interesting times.

That was not a compliment.

Climate Crisis, What Climate Crisis

Spirit – Nature’s Way

This has been your Paying Attention™ Earth For The Day.

You're welcome.

How is your Earth for the day?

Sunday, April 17, 2022

Thought For The Day

Every Day Is Still January 6th

April 17, 2022

Hey, remember when Donald Tmurp told the Proud Boys to “stand back and stand by,” and later on they tried to “hang Mike Pence” and kidnap members of Congress in order to overturn the 2020 election and end democracy in America? Remember?

What a coincidence that was.

 

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

You're welcome.

Waddaya think?

Friday, April 15, 2022

Saturday, April 9, 2022

Broken News

Critical Cruz Theory

April 9, 2022

Raphael Ted Cruz joined fellow Ratpublicans in pretending to question Ketanji Brown Jackson prior to her historic confirmation to the Supreme Court. Not satisfied with having stolen two seats on the High Court already, shameless, neo-fascist, racist assholes like Cruz, Tom Cotton, Josh Hawley, Marsha Blackburn, et al took their time in the spotlight to show off their Qanon bona fides.

Hot on the heels of Ted Cruz catapulting their excellent book Antiracist Baby onto the NY Times best seller list by using it to foment racism in his unhinged attack on Ketanji Brown Jackson, Ibram X. Kendi and Ashley Lukashevsky wisely released a companion piece to their blockbuster.

Bound to be a favorite for years to come…the book, not Cruz. He will remain despised throughout history.

 

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled carnage.