Thursday, June 9, 2022

Broken News

The Insurrection Will Not Be Televised (By Fux News)

June 9, 2022

“Just remember, what you’re seeing and what you’re reading is not what’s happening.”
                   
George Orwell Donald J. Trump, July 2018

We have a two-teared [I assume he spelled it wrong in his very empty head] justice system. If you’re a Republican, you can’t even lie to Congress or lie to an FBI agent or they’re coming after you. They’re gonna bury you. They’re gonna put you in the DC jail.
                         
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Byberry)

You Heard It Here Last (Hopefully) 

Tonight, as America (hopefully) takes a brief respite from mass gun murders to focus on saving our democracy, Fux News will not be wasting their viewers’ worthless time by airing the incredibly important, prime time, soon-to-be-Emmy-nominated, live hearing of the House Select Committee on the January 6 insurrection. Instead, Fux will be airing a Leni Riefenstahl film festival, a retrospective of Hillary Clinton’s emails and Anthony Weiner’s dick pics, after which they will be showing the murder of George Floyd on a loop for two hours with a Ted Nugent soundtrack.

As the Select Committee was being formed the political arm of Fux News – the Ratpublican Party – refused to take part in any investigation into their leader's conspiracy to overturn Joe Biden's election. All but two Ratpublican members of the House derided the very idea deciding to instead spend their time obfuscating and fabricating even though many of them knew full well that they were doing so. The rest of them are either too far gone to have any connection with reality, or worse were part of the plot to overthrow the government. Many of them claimed it was a witch hunt. Apparently, now that it has been discovered that there was a were covens of witches, Fux wants to distract their soft-brained viewers from any inconvenient truths that may have been unearthed.

They Hang Traitors, Don’t They?

The fakes at Fux cannot risk having their Silly-Putty-brained audience exposed to non-alternative facts. Their fragile minds could be permanently injured if exposed to what really happened in their names. They would be traumatized by previously unseen footage of fuckwits just like them, laying siege to the Capitol. The air in their heads would heat up and expand to explosion if they are forced to acknowledge that their beloved disgraced, twice-impeached, two-time-popular-vote-losing, one-term, seditious, ex-president and failed blogger was as fully engaged and implicated in the treasonous act as a previous Ratpublican president was when he ordered the break-in and subsequent cover-up known as Watergate. Except that guy managed to get reelected before becoming a pariah.

Fux News leads the way in running away from reality

The complete lack of coverage by right-wing media of one of the most important hearings since Watergate will be anchored by none other than the race-baiting, fact-averse, neo-fascist propagandist Fucker Criminy Swanson Carlson. Who better to ignore reality and keep his lethally ignorant viewers comfortably dumb?

Watch Conway’s head almost fall off as almost
vomits up her own feces defending “alternative facts”

Donald Tmurp – The Voice of Treason

“So look, all I want to do is this, I just want to find 11,780 votes, which is one more than we have (sic) [he meant “need” but is too stupid to complete a sentence].”
     
Donald J. Trump to Georgia’s secretary of state on January 4, 2021, just two days before he let loose his dogs of war on the Capitol to overthrow the American government he pretended to lead

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled anxiety.

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