International Nasty Women’s Day

Cherchez Les Femmes

March 8, 2019

Chrump called Hillary a “nasty woman,” Samantha Bee and others brought it on

The massive Blue Wave of 2018 got a fraction of the press that was heaped on the semi-psycho Tea Party mistake of 2010.  The Blue Wave was much bigger than was the Tea Party ripple, not to mention it brought tremendous diversity and binders full of women into the House of Representatives.  Many of these women came ready to rumble.  Perhaps none more so than Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

Women do not always get the appreciation they deserve.  Only six countries currently give women and men equal rights according to a major report from the World Bank.  That is unquestionably pathetic, but is an increase from zero a decade ago.  The six countries are Belgium, Denmark, France, Latvia, Luxembourg and Sweden.  The United States did not make the top 50, scoring 83.75.  SAD.

Before there was Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez there was Elizabeth Warren (and of course many before her).  Each of these women took Washington by storm during the current decade.  They won their respective first elections decisively, swore their oaths to the Constitution, took their places in Congress and refusing to act like the freshmen they were, went right to work kicking ass and taking names – in Ocasio-Cortez’s case she literally took names after asking Michael Cohen, “Who else knows that the president did this?” as a follow-up to “To your knowledge, did the president ever provide inflated assets to an insurance company?”  Right wing assholes are wise to attack her relentlessly, though it be to no avail.  They are afraid of her.  And they should be.  She will be kicking their asses for a long, long time to come.

Elizabeth Warren was re-elected in 2018.  She has put up with chauvinism, snark and childish disrespect from the highest levels.  As malignant Mitch McConnell misogynistically moaned two years ago, “She was warned. She was given an explanation. Nevertheless, she persisted.” 

Warren just might persist her way to unseating Donald Chrump and/or Mike Pence, of whom Warren recently said, “I’m sorry. I followed Pence’s history on LGBTQ Americans, and I don’t think that is a decent position.”  Asked if she agreed with Joe Biden calling Pence a decent guy, Warren answered, “No.”

If you’d like a refresher course on Elizabeth Warren, here is our take from 2013…

 

My Queen Elizabeth

Warrenton, DC

July 25, 2013

I’m not usually one to gush over royalty, but I’m afraid I just can’t help myself. Maybe it’s all this fuss about the royal baby. I hope he’ll be able to find some strange woman lying in a pond distributing swords or pull the sword from the stone or whatever it is they do over there to elect their king. Anyway, I never paid much attention before, but I have watched several videos of the Queen since the beginning of this year. She looks much younger than I expected, but I guess it’s all that easy living and adulation keeping her so vibrant. Every time I see her I am simply in awe of her command of history and all the nuances of her particular milieu. Perhaps you have seen an exchange or two she's had with some of the commoners.

Senator Elizabeth Warren (D-MA) 

Okay, I feel a little silly here. Apparently, this is not in fact the Queen or a queen or even a princess. This is freshman senator - now the senior senator from the great state of Massachusetts - Elizabeth Warren. She has simply taken the capitol by storm. Considering she’s a freshman senator, she takes no prisoners, no excuses and no shit from anyone. People worried she would just end up frustrated and cowed by all the pathetic losers we know as the United States Senate. Truly a more worthless governmental body has never existed. More cadaver than body if you ask me. Mostly a bunch of white guys whose brains died years ago, but whose bodies keep shuffling along the halls of Congress and Fux News.

God Save The Clean

Elizabeth Warren joined the University of Pennsylvania Law School in 1987 and became a tenured professor. She began teaching at Harvard Law School in 1992, as a visiting professor, and took a permanent position in 1995. Warren said of her history of voting as a Republican for many years, "I was a Republican because I thought that those were the people who best supported markets." In 1995 she began to vote Democratic, but she says that she has voted for both parties because she believes that neither party should dominate. Warren served as chair of the Congressional Oversight Panel created to oversee the Troubled Asset Relief Program (TARP) in 2008. She later served as Assistant to the President and Special Advisor to the Secretary of the Treasury for the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau under President Barack Obama. Then of course Obama threw her under the bus because it was too much trouble to go to bat for her when it came to crunch time.

Bankers and Wall Street thieves are scared to death of Elizabeth Warren. She knows more about what they do than they do. She’s smarter and tougher than most of them. She took their bright shining whore star - Scott Brown - and turned him into roadkill. She soundly defeated Self-Loving-Scotty after serving the partial term he won in a special election to fill the seat of Ted Kennedy - crushing him by over 7%. Brown is now a loser talking head for right wing media with almost as broad an appeal as Sarah Palin.

The economic inequality in this country is simply disgraceful. Dis. Grace. Ful. Elizabeth Warren gets it as much as anyone in the Senate. And while over the entire membership of the Senate this is an exceedingly low bar, there are a select few in that festering corpse august body that are and always have been steadfast in their support for actual Americans...you know, the 99%.

Elizabeth Warren is the real deal. She has long been determined to protect We The People from the banks and corporations that ru(i)n the government. She’s not shy and she’s not wasting any time trying to get things done. Keep an eye on Elizabeth and help her when you can. And tell everyone you know - they’ve got a friend in DC.

I. Mangrey and I (still) approve this message.

The Red, White and Ewwwwwww

She’s a Groped Old Flag

March 7, 2019

“I want to write a song called,
Please Mr. President, Go Back Up That Escalator.”
Dick Cavett March 5, 2019

Sixty-four percent of respondents to a recent Quinnipiac poll agreed that Chrump committed a crime prior to taking office, compared to 24 percent who do not and 13 percent who said they didn’t know.  Eighty-nine percent of Democrats and 33 percent of Republican’ts were in the yes camp. Forty-five percent said they believed Chrump had committed crimes while in office, while 43 percent disagreed.

Who could have predicted that Donald Chrump would turn out to be such an unmitigated disaster?  He seemed like such a nice guy and a very stable genius during the campaign.  Now it seems he can't tell the difference between Old Glory and Ivanka.  Most disingenuous politicians are content to merely hug the flag figuratively, but not whacky Uncle Donald.  He goes up there drooling and grinding our nation’s (co-opted by right wing jingoists) symbol for real.   

If a flag could burn itself, this one surely would
Betsy Ross is throwing up in her grave

As Chrump told Sean Hannity, “If it wasn’t a flag, perhaps I’d be fucking it.”  To most Americans Chrump’s unwanted advances on the American flag is nauseating and scary.  To his mindless minions it is just something else to applaud.  They do not even really see it, they just know their Dear Leader is doing something and that means applaud.  They would probably applaud if Chrump invited Ivanka up on the stage and grabbed her by the pussy.  You know he wants to.  He came pretty close at the nominating convention in the summer of 2016.

Ewwwww

According to a new report from CNN, Chrump pressured both ex-Chief of Staff John Kelly and ex-White House Counsel Don McGahn to give his daughter and top adviser Ivanka Trump a security clearance.  When neither of them agreed to his anti-security/pro-nepotism idiocy, the report says, Der Furor simply granting the clearance himself.  “I would never interfere with security clearances, as I told you before.  I never said to give Ivanka a security clearance.  I told Kelly to give the flag a clearance.  I love the flag.  There’s pictures to prove it.  No one loves the flag more than me.  I am making the flag great again and I think the flag should know many, many secrets.  I have nothing to do with Ivanka.  I haven’t even talked to her since I became president, which I did very bigly by the way.  Greatest victory since the very amazing Andrew Johnson, maybe bigger, certainly better.”

Chrump pockets check from Putin to keep talking

 I. Mangrey recovering.  Not really.

Thought For The Day

Go Cheney Yourself

March 4, 2019

There’s an old expression in Tennessee I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee, that when someone makes a significant unforced error, he is said to have “shot himself in the foot.” 

When Der Furor stood in the Rose Garden and lied about his national emergency, he simultaneously made it clear that there was, in fact, no emergency whatsoever, adding to his soon-to-be-found-illegal-decree, “I could do the wall over a longer period of time. I didn’t need to do this (true). But I’d rather do it much faster. And I don’t have to do it for the election (lie).  I’ve already done a lot of wall for the election (lie). 2020. And the only reason we’re up here talking about this is because of the election (huh?) – because they want to try to win an election, which it looks like they’re not going to be able to do (lie).”   Sorry you had to see that.  It hurts to read it, but not nearly as much as seeing and/or hearing him say it.

If Chrump left any doubt as to the urgency of his fake emergency, as soon as he finished contradicting himself, he flew off to Mor-on-Lago for his umpteenth golf vacation. 

Chrump did not shoot himself in the foot, he shot himself right in the face.  This will be known heretofore as a Cheney Selfie.

Maybe he was aiming for his foot while it was in his mouth

This has been your Paying Attention Thought For The Day.

You're welcome.

What is your thought for the day?

Two For the Goad

I Am a Big Fan

March 1, 2019

“Why do people think that Trump has surrounded himself with a lawyer goon squad for 40 years?  Whether it’s Roy Cohn or Michael Cohen.  The company Trump has kept includes the American mafia, the Russian mafia, arms traders, pedophiles, money launderers, and other people involved in white collar crime.  When you surround yourself with those sorts of people, engaged in those sorts of actions, your lawyers will be very aggressive.  They do things like put out an NDA for basically anyone Trump comes in contact with because they know he’s been a consistent scumbag.”
                                      Sarah Kendzior, January 20, 2018

If you are not aware of journalist, author and scholar on authoritarian states Sarah Kendzior, she can always be counted on for astute observation, and some of the best words, like “…Michael Cohen, this sort of mobster-multi-tasker who's just another one of these Slime coated barnacles stuck on the bottom of this Teflon-Titanic we call the Trump administration.” 

Sarah K, laying some serious schmuck-down on our putz of a prezident

 

More recently Kendzior observed, “Trump may have been in trouble. A great way to get out of trouble is if you're the president of the United States and you can pack the courts, you can purge agencies, you can rewrite the laws so you can be immune from prosecution, as well as filling your own autocratic objectives and partnering with autocrats around the world which is what he's done. This is a transnational crime syndicate masquerading as government.” 

I love that kind of talk. 

Another not-so-happy camper is Elie Mystal, who is always animated, clearly annoyed for some reason, and never pulls any punches.  Mystal recently included this tidbit during a segment on MSNBC, “SDNY (Southern District of New York) is going to be part of Donald Trump 's life for the rest of his natural life. SDNY is coming at Trump like syphilis. It's gonna make him crazy, and it's never going away.” 

Mystal, bringin’ the pain to our painful prezident

Many people are already saying that Chrump may be in the throes of syphilis since, 1) he is known to have avoided using condoms while having sex with porn stars, among others, and 2) he currently seems to be in the throes of dementia and does not seem to know where he is or what he is saying most of the time, and 3) seriously, forget what is happening inside his head, what the fuck is going on atop his head?

Nonetheless, Elie Mystal has a way with words.

I. Mangrey relaying.  Donald Chrump – the syphilis of presidents.

Afterthought For The Day

Post-Post-Racist America

February 28, 2019

        Ralph Northam’s yearbook page   Tweedle Shit and Tweedle Fuck          ……  
Which is more offensive?

Yesterday, during Michael Cohen’s testimony before the House Oversight Committee, Rep. Mark Meadows (R-NC) became melodramatically offended by a Muslim colleague, who was offended by Meadows parading one of Chrump’s two African American aides in front of the committee as proof that Chrump was not a racist.  Meadows went ballistic after Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-MI) accused Meadows of using the woman as a prop.  

Fun Fact:

Today, two videos found their way onto the internets showing Meadows saying, “2012 is the time we are going to send Mr. Obama home to Kenya or wherever it is.”  Many people who are not Mark Meadows find such statements racially insensitive.

In other news of stupid white people, the wife of Virginia Governor Ralph Northam (the guy who may or may not be pictured in the medical yearbook photo above), Virginia first lady Pam Northam handed a ball of cotton to an African American eight-grader on a tour of the governor’s mansion and asked the group, “Can you imagine being an enslaved person and having to pick this all day?”  Some people who are not Pam Northam find such statements racially insensitive.  I guess we should be thankful she did not call them indentured servants, which her husband did as a youthful indiscretion two weeks ago. 



Gary Clark, Jr. - This Land



This has been your Paying Attention Afterthought For The Day.

You're welcome.

What is your afterthought for the day?

Mike Drop

It Takes a Liar To Catch a Liar

February 28, 2019

This week, America – and much of the electronically-connected world – was treated to the long-awaited appearance of former personal attorney to long-time criminal and now president Donald J. Chrump, Michael Cohen before the House Oversight Committee.  When Republican’ts ran the committee, they were singularly focused on overlooking, not oversight.  Committee chairman Deven Nunes went so far as to break the law by keeping Donald Chrump in the loop.  As new House Oversight Committee Chairman Elijah Cummings said, “The American people, by the way, voted for accountability in November and they have a right to hear Mr. Cohen in public so they can make their own judgments.  Ladies and gentlemen, the days of this committee protecting the president at all costs are over.”  It sounds like someone has decided that the Constitution is more important than the man in the White House.

Mike and Don in happier times – two pea brains in a pod

Lest anyone think Chrump is the only problem, remember that Cohen was also vice-chairman of the Republican’t National Committee until the summer of 2018 (two months after he left the employ of Chrump).  Some of the dirty deeds Cohen carried out at the behest of, and strictly to the benefit of his boss are well known to everyone not in a coma.  But, never forget how deeply complicit the entire Republican’t party has been in jettisoning the Constitution in favor of propping up their petty tyrant.  Even now, they had no interest in asking Cohen pertinent questions about the issues at hand, but merely continued to shill for their Criminal-in-chief.  One after another, Republican’t after Republican’t used their time to attack Cohen and stand up for the slithering shit-weasel they call president.

Many pundits, were predicting that this would be Michael Cohen as modern day John Dean.  Dean, special counsel to the president under Richard Nixon ultimately decided that he could no longer act as Nixon’s protector.  In the end, Dean cooperated with authorities, and was instrumental in bringing Nixon’s elaborate Watergate cover-up to its ignominious finale.

Nixon was famously trying to cover up what he wistfully referred to as a “third-rate burglary” whereas Chrump is desperately trying to hold onto his third-rate presidency.  Nixon claimed, “I am not a crook.”  Chrump, being in possession of the best words, prefers “No COLLUSION.”

John Dean seemed like a relatively decent guy (he was not exactly squeaky clean before signing on with Nixon) who went to work for a paranoid, revenge-obsessed, sociopath.  Michael Cohen seems to have led – like the man who was his boss from 2006 until May 2018 – a life of sleazery, and only decided to do the right thing after he got caught and faced a long prison sentence.  Everything we saw of Cohen prior to his turning state’s evidence was a dim thug, slavishly loyal to the most dishonest and disloyal boss anyone could ever ask for.  Yes, Michael Cohen is a lying sleaze-bag, but if there is anyone worse than Cohen, it is surely Donald J. Chrump.  Chrump’s lie total is rapidly approaching 9,000.  Congressman Jamie Raskin (D-MD) put things in perspective, “Thank you for your composure today, Mr. Cohen.  Our [Republican’t] colleagues aren't upset because you lied to Congress for the president.  They're upset because you've stopped lying to Congress for the president.”

Cohen’s public testimony not only implicated Chrump in innumerable criminal activities before, during and after his presidential campaign, but hinted at a number of issues he was unable to talk about because other investigations into Chrump’s possible crimes were ongoing.  Cohen also left a trail of breadcrumbs for the committee and others to follow.

It seems that Cohen has grabbed world famous pussy Donald Chrump by the balls.  I guess if you are a former fixer for a star they let you do it.  Especially when the object of your affliction is half a world away courting a ruthless dictator who said nice things about you.  Chrump had to cut his date with Kim Jong Un short because he was too distracted by Cohen’s testimony without making a really, really great deal – in fact, he made no deal at all.  No one is sure if Chrump skipped out on the check.

As he was leaving Vietnam, Chrump told reporters, “I guess I was surprised that Lyin’ Mike – that very dishonest scumbag who worked for me as my personal attorney, who knew everything and did everything for me for over 10 years – told those guys that he didn’t see any collusion.  I guess he’s not so smart after all.  He’s too stupid to know collusion when it’s right in his face…I mean, NO COLLUSION.”  Unfortunately, this may all be just another day in the political climate crisis that is the Chrump Era.

I. Mangrey reporting.

She Too

February 26, 2019 

Gropey the Clown  

Once again, Donald Chrump finds himself accused of sexual harassment/assault.  This of course is nothing new.  Everyone knows, though quite a few excuse, the fact that Chrump has sexually harassed and/or assaulted some unknown number of women over many years.  This is described as fact because Chrump himself was caught on tape happily describing one of his techniques.  When he is not busy telling people (while being videotaped on television talk shows) that he would be dating his daughter if he could, he is bragging about, or acting out his physical attacks on women who are definitely not his daughter.  A number of his mistresses, dates and victims related that Chrump told them they reminded him of Ivanka.  And yet despite all of this, he still resides in the White House, while many others have been caused to leave long-held positions as a result of behavior similar, and in some cases less severe than Chrump’s. 

The White House, via Sarah Slanders, has countered saying, “This accusation is absurd on its face.”  Hardly.  Many others find such an accusation nothing short of expected.  Remember, Chrump is the man who said, “I’m automatically attracted to beautiful women — I just start kissing them, it’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab 'em by the pussy.”  But he “fell in love” with Kim Jong Un. 

Alva Johnson, the former Chrump campaign staffer and his most recent accuser, claims that as he exited an RV outside his rally for deplorables in Tampa on August 24, 2016, her then-boss grabbed her hand and leaned in to kiss her on the lips.  Johnson sensed trouble and turned her head in time to avoid being kissed head-on, and was merely grazed.  She was not physically injured, but one imagines the emotional trauma might be incalculable.  Johnson kept quiet for fear of violating her non-disclosure agreement.  And the Orange One did not even offer the customary $130K silence pay-off.  How insulting. 

The face that lunged a thousand chicks;
Chrump’s come-slither look 

I must have missed all the Republican’ts screaming for Chrump to step down because of this (not the other dozen or so, we have known about for over two years) very credible accusation.   

Anyone remember Al Franken?  Accusations were all it took for Democrats to hit the panic button, insist he resign, and for Franken to acquiesce despite a presumption of innocence and his request to undergo an official investigation.  Chrump has been accused by more women of more loathsome offenses than Franken – who reminded everyone of this fact during his farewell address, “I of all people am aware that there is some irony in the fact that I am leaving, while a man who has bragged on tape about his history of sexual assault sits in the Oval Office…”   

Where are all the good faith-based Republican’ts who so cherish holy matrimony?  Are they too busy coveting their neighbors’ wives and/or various adult entertainers cast a stone?  Are there none ready, willing and/or able to speak up for their beliefs? 

I. Mangrey reporting.  I’m watching and I'm waiting, hoping for the best.                                  

                                                                                

Climate Crisis Crisis

Happer Happens

February 23, 2019

America’s favorite very stable genius has done it again.  Chrump is bringing in another of his “the best people”, this time we get one William Happer to lead a climate change (crisis) panel.  To the surprise of no one, he tapped not just your average everyday climate crisis denying moron, but one who believes that carbon emissions are an asset.

Why do you hate your children and grandchildren?

William Happer said this on live television in 2009, “The demonization of carbon dioxide is just like the demonization of the poor Jews under Hitler.  Carbon dioxide is actually a benefit to the world, and so were the Jews.”   

While I have to admit that at first blush I was thrilled to hear someone in the Chrump administration not being anti-Semitic, there might be some unpacking to do here before breaking out the Manischewitz.  Does Happer think it was only the poor Jews who were subjected to Hitler’s extermination policy?  Does he think that Jews are not people, but actually gasses?  Or maybe that carbon dioxide is a religion?

Carbon dioxide or Jews at Auschwitz?  Who can even tell the difference?

Happer is a physicist, which surprisingly did not disqualify him from heading Chrump’s fake panel.  We are supposed to believe that Chrump created the panel to re-evaluate the national security risks of climate change.  Happer might want to know that in 2016 a bipartisan group of military experts – the Climate Security Consensus project – released a statement and two reports warning that climate change poses a significant risk to U.S. national security.  The argued that the effects of climate change will put a strain on water, food and energy supplies, which could result in “unique and hard-to-predict security [national and international] risks.”  Their 2016 statement argued that the United States “must advance a comprehensive policy for addressing this risk.”  Somebody please let me know when this starts.

As a quick aside, here is Sen. Dianne Feinstein (D-CA), who I do not think is a climate crisis denier, oldsplaining Washington, DC to a group of young children concerned about their future:

She is better than you because she just won a big election.
Now, where have I heard that tune before?  

We Now Return You To Our Regularly Scheduled Moron Already in Progress… 

Happer served under George H.W. Bush as director of the Office of Energy Research in the Department of Energy.  He was subsequently fired by Vice President Al Gore, reportedly for his refusal to support Gore’s views on climate change.  Happer also helped found the CO2 Coalition, a nonprofit created to publicize the benefits of carbon dioxide.  There is no confirmation of accusations that Happer tortures small animals, thinks coal is a food group, and believes that Donald Chrump’s “hair” color is natural.

I guess I will have to admit to being a William Happer denier.  There is simply no way that this shit-for-brains sonofabitch actually exists.

I. Mangrey vomiting.          

Abandon Chrump

Righting The Shit of State

February 21, 2019

According to reports based on reliable sources, maybe not as reliable as Putin (who Chrump trusts more than our nation’s intelligence community), but reliable nonetheless, everyone around Der Furor is reaching the end of their ropes.  All except the only two people he listens to – Ivanka and Jared.  They of course, have to be very careful if they want to stay in the will.  As if there will be anything left after dear old dad finishes paying off all his legal expenses.  And the Russians.  And some as yet to be determined number of porn stars or other women who have credibly accused him of sexual assault or harassment.

Donald Chrump, rockin’ his Third Rate “presidency”

Of course, most of Chrump’s best people have already abandoned the New Titanic for one reason or another, one way or another.  Some have been asked, told or tweeted to move on.  Not a single one has been fired by Donald “You’re Fired” Chrump himself, since he does not have the balls to confront anyone face-to-face.  Some (not very many) have moved on to other jobs (or at least tried to), some have moved on to spend more time with their families, or to start them.  Some have decided (with help from Mueller) to spend time in jail, which one assumes is easily better than spending one more second with Chrump.

A non-insignificant number of Chrump appointees, alright, a stunningly large number – most likely a record number – left under varying numbers of clouds and/or indictments.  And remember, these are the best people.  And Chrump clearly gathered many of them to his side.  To be fair, Chrump could not have known so many of them would get caught.

Our imaginary sources report that several unfortunate souls who have not yet found a way out have submitted self-incriminating evidence to Mueller’s office, hoping they can get some cozy jail time rather than stay on in Chrump’s nightmare on Pennsylvania Avenue. 

One aide, still working on his exit strategy told Paying Attention reporter T. Doff, “I just can’t take another minute working for this lunatic.  When he’s not away golfing or here watching television or on the toilet tweeting, which thankfully is most of the time, he wanders around screaming – sometimes at someone in particular, but usually at thin air.  If you think he’s a weird color when he’s prepped, you should see him when he’s raving.  I literally worry that he’s going to burst into flames.  He’s constantly comparing hand size with everyone he sees and asking everyone how his “hair” looks.  Is he fucking kidding?  Even when that shit’s glued into place, it looks like it’s been arranged with a Mixmaster.  I don’t care if I never work anywhere again.  I’d rather be sentenced to two years of root canal.  The only good thing is, I somehow managed to avoid signing a non-disclosure agreement – the rumor is even Melania’s kid had to sign one.  So you’ll be hearing a lot more from me once I have procured my freedom.  I truly hope that one day I’ll be able to look at myself in the mirror without throwing up.  I don’t know what the hell I was thinking.  This guy is a clown and a major asshole…in case you haven’t noticed.”

I. Mangrey reporting.