Question For The Day?

Is Being Stupid A Choice?

March 12, 2024

I’m Really Rich…Send Money

After Donald Trump descended down his grotesque golden escalator and upon the American political milieu, insulting Mexicans and the intelligence of the majority of Americans, he bragged that he did not need any donations from his followers because, “I’m not using the lobbyists, I’m not using donors. I don’t care. I’m really rich.”

“I don’t care. I’m really rich.” And yet his entire life is one long Trumpertantrum

Nonetheless this toxically narcissistic lifelong conman ran for the presidency as a PR stunt. But, with help from the FBI, Russia, and unintentionally from Hillary Clinton, he claimed the presidency despite losing the popular vote by more than three million votes. He then used the presidency to bilk his followers – and all taxpayers – of even more of their money (while seeing to it that his slimy son-in-law walked away with $2 billion in Saudi blood money) – oh, did I mention that after lying that he didn’t need anyone else’s money to fund his campaign, he immediately started panhandling online to take their money, in some cases turning one-time donations into monthly donations. And, he would just as soon spit in these people’s food and faces as shake their miserable hands, yet they continue to give money to a billionaire.

Today's question is:

How fucking stupid does one have to be to give money to a criminal billionaire who repeatedly gets convicted and just wants you to pay his legal fees (and maybe a little something for himself)? Why would someone give their hard-earned money – when they themselves are not “really rich” – to someone whose every action demands that he be jailed, exiled and/or undergo electro-convulsive therapy, if not a total lobotomy?

If he only had a brain

This has been your Paying Attention™ Question For The Day.

Picture Of The Day - Bombs Away

Daddy Don & Little Mikey

Look, Up In The Sky…It’s A Turd, It’s A Stain…   

March 10, 2024

Remember The Enola Gay
                   or
Donald Trump: A Dope That Will Live In Infamy  

The bomb bay doors are opening and if you look closely you can see two bombs aimed right at the heart of democracy. Ducking and covering will not protect us. Only anti-MAGA missiles, aka ballots-for-Biden can possibly save us. That is, of course, assuming Trump's personal Supreme Court either allows the election to proceed or allows all the votes to be counted, unlike what they did in appointing George WTF Bush after he lost to Al Gore in 2000.

FAT MAN & LITTLE BOY

At this moment, there are two “people” standing between Putin and his planned European incursion, which he has test-marketed with his criminal invasion of Ukraine.

I’m cold Yossarian.

Martin Mull - Bombed Anyway

 

Charles Mingus - Oh Lord Don't Let Them Drop That Atomic Bomb on Me 

You know what though, if Trump should win in November, go right ahead and let them drop that atomic bomb on me. Oh Lord. Please.
 

This has been your Paying Attention™ Picture Of The Day.

Fun Fact For The Day - SOTU Edition

Re-Butthead

March 9, 2024

During his third and probably not final State of The Union address, Sleepy Joe “Dark Brandon” Biden began the process of fileting his rematch opponent Mumbles Trump. Trump’s fake lead in the polls is about to disintegrate now that voters can no longer pretend that there might be different candidates vying in November. Biden’s hour-plus-long speech was on point, energetic and a solid boot-to-the-groin to Joe’s opponent even though that name was never spoken aloud. When one is talking about a Putin-licking, ex-president who remains a major threat to democracy and America, there is very little room for confusion to set in.

Façade Speaker of the House MAGA Mike Johnson spent the first segment of Biden’s speech nodding like a damaged bobble-head. Not sure why he was nodding at so many things he either hated or loved but voted against out of misplaced fealty to his overlard Donald Trump.

Apparently, Clarence Thomas and Sam Alito and Amy Clowny Barrett were too busy servicing their sugar daddies to attend, though their other six colleagues did show up.

Flaming Pile Of Britt

The (as usual) bizarre response from the Fascist/Trump Party was ham-fistedly delivered by freshman Sen. Katie Britt, rising star from the great state of embryo/children Alabama. Britt delivered her alarmingly bipolar rebuttal (with overtones of Hannibal Lecter) – giddy one moment, teary-eyed the next, angry the next, at times all three simultaneously (we hope she gets back on her meds asap) – from her kitchen.

Britt, seen here briefly stuck between farcically exaggerated facial settings

And didn’t Al Franken lose his Senate seat for doing this with his hands?

We are still awaiting independent verification of reports that she was barefoot. It is believed that while she was not pregnant, she did in fact have a freezer filled with babies, presumably in embryo form. Britt certainly would have been better off delivering her whatever-the-fuck-that-was in vitro.

As a result of Britt’s incomparable performance, this rising star just went supernova, which while it sounds like a wild and wonderful thing (just like West Virginia) is not really a happy moment in the life of a star.

At least Britt was not wearing a MAGA hat. Unlike some people we know. Masochistically looking at you Manic Marge.

EmptyG seen here, flouting Congress' dress code, mouth akimbo, 

making the usual ass of herself at another Biden SOTU

Where are those fucking Jewish space lasers when you need them?

Was that not in fact fun?

This has been your Paying Attention™ Fun Fact For The Day.

Schmuck Of The Day

Fukkas Gonna Fuck Us

March 8, 2024

As he slithers out the door, mega-rat-fucker Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Trump’s Rectum), makes one last (hopefully) disgraceful, cowardly, anti-America move before he leaves his position as leader of the shameful, horribly disfigured party he lost control of to an ignorant, criminal narcissist, a rapist and insurrectionist the likes of which this country has rarely seen. The “man” who said for all the world to hear and see, that “There is no question, none, that…Trump is practically and morally responsible provoking for the events” of January 6, 2021. McConnell voted to let the traitorous MAGAt off the impeachment hook instead of holding him to account for his depredations.

This pathetic, sniveling shitbag is blaming it on the voters, “It is abundantly clear that former President Trump has earned the requisite support of Republican voters to be our nominee for President of the United States.” What the fuck does that mean? Just because the Fascist/Trump Party faithful are too stupid, too ignorant, too willing to dive empty-head-first into the fascist end of the pool, does not mean that you, as a grown adult must choose your now-barely-recognizable political party over what one marginally believes is your country.

  

The pusillanimous putz from Kentucky added, “It should come as no surprise that as nominee, he will have my support.” He’s got that right. No surprise that he leaves us with his pointy tail between his legs, slithering because his spine and soul are no more. Oh, and the man Trump described as “a broken down hack politician” is no longer in possession of his balls. Trump has those hanging above the buffet at Mor-on Lago.

courtesy of Late Night with Stephen Colbert

I will offer this with all due respect*, and I would be happy to assist you in any way possible since this would not be an easy maneuver for anyone, especially someone of your age – GO FUCK YOURSELF.

And stop doing it to America.

_______________________________________________
*which is to say none whatsoever

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck Flaccid Dick Of The Day. 

Coming Up Next…

Tune in tomorrow when Nikki Haley giddily and enthusiastically endorses Donald Trump as a world-class humanitarian and a great American who will be the best president this country has ever seen. 

Bad News Boors

Good News/Bad News*

March 6, 2024

Here’s a little twist on the old good news/bad news joke.

Me: I have good news and bad news. What would you like to hear first, the good news or the bad news

You: Oh, I don’t know, why don’t you give me the bad news first.

Me: Okay. The bad news is, we might not have to wait until the November 5, 2024 election to know if American democracy, imperfect though it may be, will be nuked into oblivion as a result of the election of Donald “Person-Woman-Man-Camera-TV” Trump becomes the 47^th (and first full-on fascist) president of the United States.

You: What the fuck does that mean? Sorry, I normally don’t use the word ‘fuck.’ Oh shit, I just said ‘fuck’ again. Aw, fuck it.

Me: It means that Mitch McConnell’s Extreme Court may very soon rule that American presidents (or perhaps only American presidents named Donald Trump) have absolute immunity from any and all prosecution – even if they attempt to overthrow the American government, or perhaps stand in the middle of Fifth Avenue and shoot somebody, or maybe piss on the Constitution and then use it to wipe their ass, which I know, sounds incredibly disgusting, but c’mon who are we kidding here with this Trump guy who has no shame, no scruples, no respect for anything or anybody, including himself.

Just yesterday, the Court decided that, states’ rights be fucked, no state can restrict even what the three non-reptiles on the Court called “oath-breaking insurrectionists” from appearing on the ballot. Well, states cannot kick a certain oath-breaking insurrectionist off their ballot. This would likely change should a Democrat be in a similar situation. We. Are. Fucked.

And remember, this group with its massive 6-3 majority (featured here recently as STEAL Team Six) of radical, anti-democratic religious fanatics and scofflaws has repeatedly run roughshod over what the majority of Americans want, despite the fact that five of these six renegades-in-robes were appointed by presidents who did not win the popular vote. They have repeatedly upended settled law – something those in the majority insisted, during their nomination hearings, they would never do. They have in the past fucked with voting rights, made dark money supreme in politics, and most recently murdered Roe v. Wade. Now they are turning their attention to helping Donald Trump get re-elected by any means necessary. Or so it clearly appears. We will not know for sure just how far they are willing to go to protect Trump and fuck democracy until they are fucking good any ready to let us know, as they flagrantly slow-walk their decision on Trump’s claim of absolute presidential immunity. Don’t be surprised if they pull a Bush v. Gore (which three of these partisan slobs helped shove down America’s throat while acting as attorneys for the loser of the 2000 election and worst president in American history, until Trump came along – George WTF Bush) and make an obviously horrendous decision and then claim that their ruling cannot be used as precedent in any other future case. We have no reason to expect anything less disgraceful.

They have blithely fucked with the past and viciously fucked with the future.

However, should the psycho-six rule that there is absolute presidential immunity and are not shameless enough to insist it only applies to their guy, then current-president Joe Biden should make good use of his newly-granted super powers and do whatever the fuck he wants. Checkmate.

You: Okay, enough, just give the damn good news already; I can’t take this anymore. I’m feeling suicidal.

Me: You sure you’re ready for the good news?

You: Yes, I’m sure. I can’t take any more bad news. Sock it to me.

Me: Alright, here it is – there ain’t no fucking good news. What the fuck were you thinking? Wake up and smell the napalm.

Apologies for the long set-up. I hope you weren’t expecting The Aristocrats.** Although, it’s not entirely dissimilar.

_____________________________________________________
*Inspired by a much shorter, much funnier bit by Albert Brooks (pictured above) from A Star is Bought 

**One of the least horrifying versions of The Aristocrats

Epilogue

Expand the fucking Supreme Court, repercussions be damned, before it’s too late.

I. Mangrey, beside myself. But, not yet discorporated.

STEAL Team Six

Vous Recuse

March 4, 2024

As previously reported in this space, the disgraced Supreme Court, the most corrupt Supreme Court in American history, has – for no apparent good reason – stalled and then taken up a case that is so absurd on its face. That case revolves around Donald Trump’s delusional claim of absolute immunity for all 45^th presidents. Forevers. It also revolves around Trump’s irrefutable involvement/incitement in insurrection.

STEAL Team Six – deployed to take out democracy…with prejudice

Shown here without their disguises

Any Supreme Court justice whose wife is implicated in the January 6^th insurrection should obviously recuse himself. Especially if that wife was quite possibly an as-yet-unindicted co-conspirator in said insurrection. I know what you’re thinking and/or screaming, there’s no way a justice on the high court would have a wife who aided and abetted the attempted overthrow of the United States government. If such an unthinkable disgrace would ever happen, surely a recusal – in the name of justice – would be a no-brainer.

In a similar vein, surely any Supreme Court justice who was appointed by the defendant in a case would see no way to avoid recusing themselves. Especially if that case involved an attempted overthrow of the United States government, and especially if one or more of those justices got on the Court by less-than-savory means. like say, if those seats on the Court were stolen by a patently evil Senate majority leader.

A Funny Thing Didn’t Happen On The Way To The Fascism 

Anticipating Trump’s attempt to stall, which is a no-brainer since that has been Trump’s go-to defense in every case, including the many, many cases he has lost over the years, Jack Smith requested – on December 11, 2023 – that the Supreme Court hear the case of absolute presidential immunity. Smith did this in order to get this ridiculous lawsuit done and dusted in plenty of time to get Trump put away for insurrection. Go directly to Jail. Do not anywhere near the fucking White House, do not collect 11,783 non-existent votes. After jail, go directly to Hell.

The high court ignored Smith’s very legitimate, very important request, tossing the case to a lower court which promptly found that Trump and his lawyers were full of what in legal circles is known as shit. The Supremes then sat on their hands, or in Clarence Thomas, Sam Alito and Neil Gorsuch’s cases, their piles of billionaire-supplied cash and valuable prizes, until this past week when they told us they will expedite this critical case to April 22, and then take their sweet time and get back to us some time before the Rapture. 

Georgia On Our Minds

Meanwhile, down in Georgia a judge is now deciding whether or not Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis has a conflict of interest in the case of the attempted creation of 11,783 votes/extortion phone call to Georgia Secretary of State Brad Raffensburger. As everyone by now has heard Trump’s perfect phone call threatening Raffensberger in the hopes of convincing (i.e., coercing) the secretary to make up, or switch, or just lie about who won the state of Georgia in the 2020 presidential election that Joe Biden won by a landslide. DA Willis made the incredibly stupid mistake of dating one of her prosecutors – who just happened to wind up on the Trump case.

Based on the trial to determine if Willis should be disqualified from the case, now in the judge’s hands, there has been no substantive evidence that, stupid though it may have been, Willis’ affair in no way interfered with the proper and extremely necessary prosecution of the treasonous hot air buffoon Donald Jape Trump.

There is no way what Willis did comes within a light year of conflict of interest practically suffocating Thomas, Gorsuch, Kavanaugh and Coney Barrett all of whom should recuse themselves from any case having to do with Trump.

Not to mention the Donald “I’m Allowed To Take Stuff” Trump-appointed “judge” Aileen “Loose” Cannon overseeing the Mor-on Lago stolen/hidden/lied-about documents case, who was previously reprimanded on this case before it even started and was reversed by a superior court for being in the tank for Trump once the case began. How she is permitted to remain on/against this case is beyond comprehension.

One Last Thing

Sixty-four percent of Americans want a pre-election verdict in Jack Smith’s federal election case – you know, the one we started our time together today with, the one STEAL Team Six seems more than willing to slow walk to death in order to help Russia and Trump get back into the White House in November. So fuck you, you ultra-religious, Christian-nationalist, emolument-teat-sucking, ultra-partisan hacks. Give us a speedy fucking trial or get the fuck out of our Court.

American justice, bitches! Deal with it.

I. Mangrey reporting. I rest my case.

Thought For The Day - Go Flag Yourself

Fuck The Flag *

March 2, 2024

Demented, deranged, disgraced, twice-impeached, four-time-indicted (so far), failed insurrection leader and Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president Defendant J. Trump was once again seen freakishly fondling an American flag on stage in front of his democracy-averse cultists. And they say burning the flag is sacrilegious. 

The flag Trump loves…to poop on

On the nauseating video of Trump’s latest fakakta flag fucking frenzy, Trump could be seen mouthing the words “I love you” to the old Red, White and Blue.

One assumes, since Trump has cheated on everyone else (besides Ivanka) to whom he has mouthed those words, that he will be, or more likely already has been cheating on our flag, just as he cheated on our country – with Russia.

The flag Trump actually loves

One of these people actually respects the flag
and the democracy for which it (ostensibly) stands –
and got shit for it, while the other one shits on it

_______________________________________________
*It’s not me saying this; it’s Trump dry-humping it because when you’re a star (or a flaming douchebag with a crazed cult following) too many people don’t vomit when they see you do it.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day. We salute you.

Broken News - Bye, Felicia

Bye, Bye Turdie

February 29, 2024

Anti-Democratic (understandable) and anti-democratic (unforgiveable) Senate saboteur “Moscow” Mitch McConnell, killer of decent legislation, stealer of Supreme Court seats, hypocritical enabler of the objectively worst president in American history – unfortunately, I’m not looking at you any more George WTF Bush – Donald Jism Trump, and all-around piece-of-shit-on-two-legs, has announced his long-overdue departure from his position as super-fucked-up leader of Ratpublicans in the Senate. Don’t let the floor hit you on the way out. Surely the Trump/Fascist Party will not replace McConnell with another reactionary, old, white, power-mad weasel. We should all be able to breathe a little sleazier now.

Good-bye, my damage is done here.

In Other News Of Turds

The Extreme Court has decided to go all in for the guy who appointed three of them. The Court (well not all of them one assumes) has decided to put their bloodmoney stained thumbs on the scales of justice in order to help Trump delay all of his court appearances – in particular, the not-so-mysterious case of the January 6^th Insurrection and Trump’s phantasmagorical insistence that a president (i.e., only Trump) has absolute immunity-for-life – so that he can continue to bamboozle his cult.

They are clearly throwing their lot in with Team Russia and the Russian wing of the Trump/Fascist Party by entertaining Trump’s frivolous and stunningly anti-democratic claim of presidential immunity. Regardless of how horrific their decision might be, this maneuver – wholly unnecessary and frivolous in its own right – has already ensured that Trump will not face any music from the justice system. Such as it is.

Do You Want Lies With That?

Autocracy is on the menu folks. The only chance we have to at least delay a new American fascism, is to crush Trump and his fellow travelers on November 5, 2024. And remember, just winning the popular vote by three million or eight million or forty million votes is not enough in our so-called democracy. The victory must not only be achieved in the anti-democratic Electoral College – a college with laxer admission standards than obedience schools for dogs – but might very well also need to get past a Congress that decides that Congress, and not the American electorate, or even the bullshit Electoral College, but a Congress whose Speaker (handpicked by Trump and Putin) might refuse to let anyone but the House of “Representatives” (who are in fact anything but representative of the electorate thanks to gerrymandering on steroids) pick the next president-who-would-be-king. We already had one Ratpublican appointed by the Supreme Court thanks to the egregious Bush v. Gore disgrace. Now, the Pro-Putin Party wants a turn.

Whatever you do, avoid reading this mind-blowing, heart-stopping, soul-punching article by Thom Hartmann: The New "Over the Top" Secret Plan on How Fascists Could Win in 2024

I need a nap. And possibly a lobotomy.

I might be watching too much news.

Naturally, supreme scofflaw and disgraceful partisan Clarence Thomas, whose Qanon-encrusted wife was much more than a cog in Trump’s insurrection, and who should but most assuredly will not recuse himself, will have his billionaire/fascist/radical-Christian nationalist-funded thumb on the now Trumpian gold-plated scale.

Funkadelic – THINK! It ain't illegal yet

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled happy thoughts.

Paying Attention™ Question For The Day

Out Of The Biden Pan, Into The Liar

February 27, 2024

The Democratic presidential primary in Michigan today features a serious protest vote intended to send President Joe Biden a message. The large Muslim community in Michigan is understandably frustrated with the way Biden is dealing with Benjamin Netanyahu’s now over-the-top response to the atrocities perpetrated upon Israel by Hamas on October 7^th.

Today's question is (and I have not heard anyone bring this up):

Since Netanyahu (who is desperately trying to distract his country from his Trump-like legal troubles) is a flaming right-wing neocon, who has a decades-long relationship with the Kushner family (Yes, that Kushner family) and has a history of dissing Democratic presidents, if these folks are unhappy with Biden’s performance on this issue, what the fuck do they think Donald Trump’s response would be?

This has been your Paying Attention™ Question For The Day.