December 7, 2019
Since December 7th is already a date that will
live in infamy, why not talk about a man that will live in infamy – a one-man
Pearl Harbor, our very own kamikaze president Donald J. Chrump. Donald Chrump, who respects no one – and the
feeling is mutual – but fell in love with Kim Jong Un, is desperately trying to
keep his chestnuts from getting fatally roasted.
The Roastmaster, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi, who
Chrump calls Nervous Nancy, as in, “You make me very nervous, Nancy,” recently
assured an also nervous majority of Americans that the impeachment train Adam
Schiff drove out of the station continues to run smoother than a Tesla
Roadster, and with similar acceleration capabilities.
And now, a word from our newest sponsor…
From the determined folks at Berder King who brought you the
Impossible Berder, you are invited to enjoy, well, experience, the new Impossible
President. You may never want to eat…or
vote…again.
Wow, he paid (where’s the
proof?). Big spender. He also ate 300 of them.
We are what we elect.
The world is abuzz over the emergence of hamburgers, or for some, hamberders that are made without meat. Many people are fooled, thinking they are eating real meat…or whatever it is they typically serve in these fast food establishments, but it is actually plant-based protein. Sounds yummy, don’t it? Similarly, many people have been fooled into thinking that the man currently besmirching the White House, while padding his fake bank account and doing what is best for Russia every single day, is an actual president, but it is actually a toxic orange gas cloud. Much less yummy sounding.
No one knows where we will go from here. Will America die from this bleeding ulcer of
a president? Will we recover our
dignity, our standing among the nations of the world? Will we have to live with a permanent
disability and limp along into the future as a second-rate power?
I. Mangrey reporting. I think I lost my appetite.
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