Thief Justice Clarence Thomas

Cloudy With A Chance Guarantee Of Bribery

November 14, 2023

Thanks to ProPublica’s reporting on the gargantuan grifting scumbags Sam Alito and Clarence Thomas, and the consequent calls for ethics rules for the Supreme Court, the high court has agreed to put in place window dressing that is supposed to pass for a code of conduct. As it stands, this minimal, fairly vague code of conduct will be enforced by the same people it is meant to regulate.

Though Alito is likely a more egregious asshole overall, Thomas takes the cake covered in gold flecks when it comes to raking in the big perks (total value is difficult to measure, but likely in the millions) and returning the judicial favors – value, priceless.

I remember the good old days when I despised Clarence Thomas for simply being a credibly-accused sexual harasser, and the least-qualified Supreme Court appointee who then became the Court Mime for two decades. Those were the good old days. And then he finally opened his fat fucking mouth, to the horror of most Americans.

Thomas in (minimally) better times

Suddenly, after the death of his mentor – and hunting buddy of Dick Cheney who managed to avoid being shot in the face – Antonin Scalia, Thomas wouldn't STFU...except when it came to being honest about his myriad emolument violations, his wife's fanatical right-wing fight against democracy, and his own refusal to recuse himself when either or both of these transgressions are front-and-center in various cases before the Court. Thomas seems hell-bent on the destruction of the Supreme Court's image and legacy.

Oh, and he has had one fuck of a time paying his taxes. He forgot all about the money he was willing to admit his wife made, let alone all the income they were hiding completely. And gifts like a nearly $270,000 mobile home he never had to pay for. He also claimed he did not know he had to include personal bank accounts in his tax filings. Apparently, Thomas would rather be known as a complete moron than a tax cheat. Wouldn’t you? No one has ever gone to jail just for being dumb.

That Was Then, This Is Now (And Then)

Now, Thomas’s horrific judicial record is seeming to pale in comparison (not really, this is what's known as poetic license) to his flagrant disregard for the law and/or simple morality.

Surely it is mere coincidence that Uncle Thomas became “good friends” with Harlan Crow (who Thomas dishonestly describes as a life-long friend), Leonard Leo and the Koch brothers only after being appointed to the Supreme Court. I mean, that’s only fair. After all, when Thomas was growing up, he was poor and black – not exactly someone who would attract the attention, let alone the money, exotic vacations on private jets, and who knows what other valuable perks (like purchasing his mother’s house so she could live rent-free) he ultimately got from all these filthy-rich White guys once Thomas became valuable to them.

I don’t know why everyone is getting so bent out of shape over Thomas raking in the favors from billionaires who would like him to rule in their favor someday. Uncle Thomas is just trying to make it clear that African Americans ultimately benefitted from slavery.

I don’t see so good, but I don’t see any trips to Walmart

And then there’s his traitorous, election-denying, Trump-cultist wife, but that’s a tome for another day.

Clarence Thomas is a shameless partisan hack and an amoral cheat, doing the bidding of kleptocratic pigs. A number of people continue to call on Thomas to recuse himself from various cases before the court, lest he further erode the law and the lives of average Americans. Thomas should be recusing himself from the Supreme Court. Period.

I. Mangrey testifying.