Thursday, February 1, 2024

Age Is Just How Old You Are

The (Would-Be) Emperor Has No Brains (And His Clothes Ain’t So Hot)

February 1, 2024

Donald Trump is three-and-a-half years younger than Joe Biden. Yet many people are all in a tizzy over Joe Biden’s age? What a bunch of malarky. Trump’s brain is 80 years older than Joe Biden will ever be.

Okay, so Biden fell off his bike, but he rides a bike for fuck sake. And, when Biden fell off his bike he got right back up. Trump can barely manage a gently sloping ramp on foot, let alone stairs. And when he falls down, they have to bring in a fucking crane to get him up because his entire Secret Service detail already have hernias.

Looks like Jack LaLanne vs. Jabba the Hutt

A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Not Have

Just for the record, alleged, and very likely serial rapist Donald Trump insists that E. Jean Carroll, who has been kicking his ass in the courts over accusations (now validated by the legal system) of sexual assault and defamation, is not “his type” for, I guess, raping?

My guess is that Trump thinks Ms. Carroll was 80 years old nearly 30 years ago – when he literally grabbed her “by the pussy” – since she is 80 today. Also, at 80 Carroll looks to be in good shape and healthy despite the horrific stress spending unwanted time with Trump in the dressing room at Bergdorf's has caused her.

Trump on the other hand looks like a giant, bleached road-kill ground hog, bloated almost beyond recognition from lying in the sun for several days. People who apply their makeup by the pound with a fully charged icing anointment utensil and waddle around with a Guinness Book of World Records comb-around-and-around-and-around make-believe “hair” shouldn’t throw stones. He would be better off downing a bit of bleach or shining a powerful light where the sun don’t shine. Oh, and STFU.

Image from Garry Trudeau's book of Trump satire, “Lewser!”
(Andrews McMeel Publishing 2020)

Video of a deposition from 2022 was recently released where Trump is asked to identify a woman standing right next to him in a photo. He is seen examining the photo – one that he admits to having seen before – and pointing to E. Jean Carroll (who he still insists “I never met this woman in my life”) stating she is his second wife. Though Trump has testified that Carroll was not his type – as though that means something in the context of rape – one assumes that the woman he cheated on his first wife with, and eventually married (and cheated on with third wife) was his type. But who am I to put words in his sphincter-like mouth.


Professional idiot Trump seen here simultaneously misidentifying
his then wife Marla Maples* and E. Jean Carroll**

Trump would probably have trouble picking himself out of a lineup.

________________________________________________
*The woman Trump cheated on his first wife with and then married; to be fair, he may have only been cheating
on his first wife Ivana with Maples at the time of the photo
**One of the two dozen or so women Trump raped; the only one who has proved in in court


I. Mangrey reporting…and, loving it. 

No comments:

Post a Comment