Jest For Fun

September 6, 2025

Jest For Fun

Pee-wee Herman's Water Ski Entrance | CONAN on TBS

Thought For The Day – Trump Is Like Hitler*

Don't Take This The Wrong Way

September 4, 2025

Given the relentless abrogation of his oath of office and his utter and relentless contempt for anyone who is not Donald Trump, including deploying the United States military against American citizens on home soil, blatantly demanding Texas to steal House seats from voters, and a list of other infractions too long and nauseating to mention, many people are saying Trump is like Hitler.

Almost every day people come up to me, big strong men, women and even children, tears in their eyes, they say “Sir, we are so sad that Trump is like Hitler. We did not vote for Hitler. We don’t want Hitler. We don’t want Trump to be like Hitler. How do we stop Trump from being like Hitler?”

I try to calm their nerves by responding with an answer to simple, so true, it cannot be denied and should without any doubt put the whole issue to rest; “It makes no sense to say Trump is like Hitler. Hitler had a mustache.” Case closed. 

“Our capitol city has been taken over by violent gangs and bloodthirsty criminals, roving mobs of wild youth, drugged-out maniacs and homeless people.”
                                      Donald Trump

We at Paying Attention™ would never say that Trump is like Hitler because if we were to say Trump is like Hitler, and to be clear, we are not saying that Trump is like Hitler, many other people – those who like us, refuse to say that Trump is like Hitler – might take a statement like “Trump is like Hitler” the wrong way.

“The streets of our country are in turmoil. The universities are filled with students rebelling and rioting. Communists are seeking to destroy our country…Without law and order our nation cannot survive.”
                                     Donald Trump**

See, completely different – Trump’s on a white horse

And Hitler never said anything like this…

“I have a right to do anything I want to do. I’m the president of the United States.”
                         Donald Trump, August 26, 2025

I Do Not See Hitler When I Look At Trump

The main reason we would never say that Trump is like Hitler is that there is a huge difference between Trump and Hitler. Adolf Hitler wanted to take over the world. Donald Trump wants to fuck over the world.

These are very different agendas.

I mean, come on, would a murderous dictator who terrorizes his own populace go around putting giant posters of his vomitous face all over town?

Q: Is Trump really a dictator or just a dick? A: Let’s go with both.

And it’s not like Trump is sending masked stormtroopers and tanks into minority cities to violently assault, terrorize and kidnap non-white people from courthouses, hospitals, schools, farms and Home Depots. Right?

Oh, and Hitler didn’t pal around with pedophile sex traffickers and was not himself a serial rapist. That we know of.

Also, and perhaps most important, Hitler had the good sense to blow his brains out when the going got tough.

Just so we’re clear.

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*Though this reads ‘Trump is like Hitler’, we are not saying that Trump is like Hitler; the phrase ‘Trump is like Hitler’ is merely part of the heading. As you will read, or have already read, we are in no way aligning ourselves with those who say Trump is like Hitler...even if you are one of those who believes, perhaps reasonably, that Trump is like Hitler. Our apologies to any who thought because Trump is working straight from the Hitler playbook, that we implied Trump is like Hitler. You will Nazi us claim that Trump is like Hitler.
**Oops, this one was actually Adolf Hitler. This was our mistake and for that we apologize.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.
And not an attempt to convince anyone that Trump is like Hitler.

Late Nite With I. Mangrey

Best Headline of The Day

September 2, 2025

Having disappeared and shut the fuck up for 2-3 days, fueling concerns/hopes that the executive interloper was gravely ill. Crassputin ultimately resurfaced to share “important” news. That news? Dear Leader announced he was moving Space Command (is this the new branding for Space Force?) headquarters from Colorado to Alabama. President Corpse is punishing Colorado because, he says, “they do mail-in voting... so they have automatically crooked elections.”

From the good folks at Crooks & Liars…

Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Schmuck Of The Day – Greg Gut(less)feld

Fox Fucks Fondle Fascism

September 2, 2025

Well, here’s what’s going on* over at Fux Dead Horses…I mean “News”

Proud asshole Gutfeld fancies himself a funny man. Wrong on both counts.

Yes, by all means, feel free to call yourselves Nazis. Maybe start your own Fight Club and beat yourselves to a pulp.

However, this is quite the interesting response to calling Trump’s masked, excessively armed, terrorizing stormtroopers who are acting like the Nazi Gestapo, and those who sicced them on the American public – Nazis. When it talks like a Nazi and it acts like a Nazi, it just might be a Nazi. Or something like it.

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*Actually, this ‘went on’ a bit of a while ago, it just got lost in the flood of fascist fucknuttery that has been the summer of ’25.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck Of The Day. Schmuck on!

Thought For The Day – Something Borrowed

Carl Hiassen

The Devolution Will Be Completely Televised

September 1, 2025

We’re quite fond of Carl Hiassen’s books here at Paying Attention™. The featured quote below comes from his 2018 book for adolescents Squirm.

Working at a grocery store, you meet lots of nice folks and see many acts of kindness. But you also witness scenes that make you wonder if our species is evolving in the wrong direction – backward, into the ancient slime we crawled from millions of years ago, when we were just innocent little fish growing legs.

Working or not working just about anywhere else too.

And the jury is way out on our current direction. We are clearly at a tipping point and the most powerful person on the planet is a lizard-brained sadist with zero regard, no strike that, utter, steaming contempt for humankind and the planet we inhabit.

Maybe, but not for long.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

Everything-Is-Broken News – Weekend At Donnie’s

Death Be Not Loud

August 31, 2025

Don’t take this the wrong way, but Donald Trump is not well. Not just the long-standing, multi-faceted, disgustingly unwell he has been his whole miserable life. Beside all the other stuff, he is physically failing bigly like never before (except maybe when he almost died of COVID). 

Death-Rattle Don disappeared for two days and came back looking like death warmed under. VD Vance is already planning his big day.

Thanks to JSB IV

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled high hopes.

Where The Sun Don't Shine

Ewwwwwwwwwww

August 30, 2025

Is it easy or difficult to be both a staggeringly pathetic little man and a brutal dictator at the same time? Done Trump sure makes it look easy. As he rapidly deteriorates mentally, emotionally and physically, his undying need for constant stroking by himself and others is snowballing just as swiftly.

Every time this very small man brings his cabinet together it is nothing more than an exercise in sick-o-phancy. All that happens (as show below) is his hand-picked pukes take turns French kissing his giant ass. And this treacherous cretin actually broadcasts this world class bullshit. Anyone who watches this smooch-fest needs professional help – either for watching it in the first place, or for emotional rehab after watching it.

Jen Psaki’s montage

After this three-hours-long feces-fondling flatter fest, this psychotic suck-up session, this pathetic pandering performance, Trump was rushed to the proctologist’s office complaining of an unusual, severe pain in his siting region. What the doctor found up there was the entire cabinet, most of the Supreme Court, and a majority of both the House and the Senate.

The doctor has since jettisoned all his worldly possessions, retired and was last seen entering a dark cave on a deserted island. There are things you just can't unsee.

I. Mangrey reporting. Please let me know you liked this. And if you have a few extra seconds please tell me how wonderful I  am. Please, please, please... It's not for me, it's for a friend.   

Broken News – Cruel, Unusual, Fatally Toxic

Broken News – Cruel, Unusual, Fatally Toxic

The Punisher

August 29, 2025

Donald Trump should be ruled unconstitutional on grounds of violating the Eighth Amendment of the Constitution:

Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted. (italics mine)

While we are not all technically out on bail, excessive or otherwise, we are all being held hostage by Trump. We are also experiencing the imposition of excessive fines thanks to his insane, illegal tariff travesty.

The Trump presidency is clearly cruel and unusual punishment. And we didn’t even break any laws causing us to be subjected to such, though we* did act with incredible stupidity in “electing” him to the presidency, not once but twice.

Speaking of electing a psychotic, sociopathic, fascist conman twice…

Not a huge Gavin Newsom fan, but we need more of this

If there was any doubt about just how cruel and unusual this slithering shitbag was before, during and/or after his first ungodly term, even many of those who voted for the Devil’s Douchebag in 2024 are starting to figure out how badly they fucked up.

This actually happened. I saw it on South Park.

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*When I say ‘we’ of course I mean the tens-of-millions morons, racists and assorted assholes who actually voted for this badly-dyed, phony-coiffed conman who believes this land is his land, not yours and anyone who disagrees with him should be locked up and/or deported with prejudice.
 

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled evasive maneuvers.

Question For The Day – Pol-ICE State

Even If It Really Hurts, Don’t Put ICE On It

August 28, 2025

All over America there are now brutal thugs in body armor and masks violently assaulting people of color (no lynchings…yet) and dragging them away from schools, jobs, courthouses, Home Depots and streets and houses.

Very few of these detainees/hostages/kidnap victims have committed anything like a crime. Nonetheless, they are being hauled off to places unknown and often places illegal.

Personally, I will be avoiding spending any time in the sun for the foreseeable future lest I become overly tanned and mistaken for one of these unfortunate targets of the fascist Trump regime’s onslaught of sick stupidity and abject terrorism against the American public.

These are real but some fuckers wear gear saying “POLICE” or “ICE” just for “fun”

Today’s Question For The Day:

If you shoot and/or kill one or more unidentified masked lunatics attempting to drag you to the ground in the vicinity of an unmarked black SUV and those masked assailants turn out to be part of Trump’s gestapo, does your understandable reaction constitute standing your ground or will you simply be shot at dawn?

Bonus Question:

What the actual fuck is going on around here?

As always…

This has been your Paying Attention™ Question For The Day.