Investment Opportunity For The Day

So You Want To Be A Millionaire

May 27, 2023

Blogging admittedly, though thoroughly enjoyable, does not pay the bills…any of them. All of the books and movies, and fine products – like Rent-a-Coma™, Votegra™, or even the democracy-preserving Moron-a-Tron™ Mental Detector – have failed to put enough food on the table to feed the average (non-Gregor-Samsa-sized) cockroach.

The latest Paying Attention™ get-rich-moderately-quickly-or-even-in-super-slow-motion scheme is something I can’t believe no one has ever thought to do. Why not combine two of the most popular and oldest professions? I think this idea might finally rake in millions when we open up our new chain of stores.

What better way to know for sure if you will really like the mattress you are shopping for? Everyone who has ever bought a mattress knows how difficult it is to decide how compatible your new mattress will be after just lying there for a few minutes and feeling awkward about being there where anyone can see you, and then buying something just to get the whole thing over with.

Mattress Whorehouse™ will offer clean, private rooms where you can give a mattress a true field test. And you guys, after you’re finished giving the mattress a good workout, you can pass out, sleep it off and see how you feel the next morning.

The smart money says Mattress Whorehouse™ will outsell every other mattress superstore. Put your money where my mouth is; get in on the ground floor while you still can.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Investment Opportunity For The Day.

How much you got on you?