Thinking Outside The Brain

All Fluxed Up

November 22, 2024

The recent disastrous election of a mentally ill convicted felon who previously incited a violent coup attempt has this nation in a state of massive fucks…I mean flux…nah, let’s go with fucks.

Expert Explains Why, Essentially, You’re Fucked | Onion Now: Focus

There's thinking outside the box and there's thinking outside the brain. The former often leads to revelation and innovation, the latter is what we get from Trump.

 

Wow, remember when this was almost true?

Trump’s new cabinet picks may be his way of trying to get us to admit that the completely unqualified and inappropriate, purposely incompetent, frequently corrupt mental midgets of his first administration weren’t so bad after all.

Wow, remember when SCOTUS said this was actually true?

Sorry to keep harping on this, but #47 continues to unveil his cuckoo-for-cocoa-puffs cabinet picks. He has chosen Russian asset/stooge Tulsi Gabbard to be the next Director of National Intelligence. This is only slightly better than giving Putin himself daily briefings – in fact, it might be the exact same thing.

Next up, RFK, Jr. and his magic brain worm have been tapped as the head of Health and Human Services. 

Bobby's brain worm is dead…we’re next

The ex-heroin junkie and current cuckoo bird and whale decapitator was recently spotted in his quest to “make America healthy again” eating McDonalds and drinking a Coke with his new BFFs on a private jet (which burns up much more fossil fuel per passenger, but who give a flying fuck now that Trump is appointing a fracking exec as energy secretary – now that’s what I call healthy). I guess Bobby, Jr., who was hungry enough to eat a bear, couldn’t find any edible dead ones on the plane.

And what the fuck is Dumb, Jr. doing?

Some are saying that Trump forced Bobby to eat the food he despises, but surely that won’t be the worst thing he has to swallow in order to stay in Donny’s good graces. At least he didn’t need to be on his knees for this one. Stay tuned.

For his next trick, #47 is putting up a number of his personal criminal attorneys (double entendre or not – you make the call) to head up the Department of Justice under the wandering eye of Matt Gaetz.

Unlike most Americans, I'm not looking for a president I could have a drink with, I'm looking for a president who can think me under the table. I want the smartest guy in the room, not the most sociopathic.

Democrats, Take Note

Meanwhile in New Zealand, Māori lawmakers performed the haka, a traditional ceremonial dance, in parliament on Thursday to protest against a bill that aims to reinterpret a centuries-old document seen as New Zealand's founding treaty with its Indigenous people.

Māori lawmakers protest a bill that would reinterpret a centuries-old document
(Can you say U.S. Constitution?)

The good news here is…

 

 

Well, I tried.

If you are not presently afraid of clowns, you will be now.

Prepare yourself for Trump's newest surreality tv show: Real Cabinuts of Washington, DC

Frank Zappa –Trouble Every Day

I. Mangrey, still at it. I couldn't have done it without me.

LATE UPDATE:

Asshole, pervert, scumbag Matt Gaetz has withdrawn his stupid face from consideration as Trump’s insane pick for Attorney General. Hopefully, the investigation into his sexual exploits with under-age girls and illegal drug use will still be made public in case Gaetz ever wants to show his giant head in public again.