Life In The Big Shitty

Don Don’t Give A Fuck, So We Have To

May 1, 2025

Dontrump may have dementia and various other brain damages, but the worst part of his very, very bad uh-brain still functions at a high level. It is not part of the cerebral cortex, the part where thought, empathy, compassion or any functions that serve the greater good. It is the thoughtless, self-preservation lizard brain. 

PAYING ATTENTION™  SPECIAL BULLETIN

Today – the annual day to honor workers everywhere – there will be protests and marches everywhere. More than just about any other May Day, this one demands our attention and participation. Everyone here at Paying Attention™ will be heading to City Hall in Philadelphia, the City Where It Happened, to join with thousands of others, including Bernie Sanders, to show our keen displeasure of convicted felon Death-To-America-Don. Try to get yourself to a gathering somewhere today. We the people are the only thing that can put a stop to this Manchurian Moscowian interloper’s mission to bury America alive.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled musings already in progress...

Donny Dementia showed up – presumably for the sole purpose of pissing everyone off – at the funeral of Pope Francis, who if he had not been a pope might well have found joy and caring for humankind by kicking Old Don right in his tiny little nuts. And then punching him in his pumpkin-pancake-made-up face.

Donny Fartbreath not only thumbed his nose, or his whatever, at Pope Francis, but he was seen texting, falling asleep with his fat, foul mouth agape, and generally disrespecting everyone and everything…as usual. The turd icing on Donny’s shit-cake assault on the Pope’s funeral was his premature departure so he could get back on the golf course asap. I guess everyone should feel honored Donny Divot even bothered to change out of his golf-cheating outfit for the funeral.*

Donny’s (and Rudy's) old pal Lev Parnass shares his interesting and disturbing take on the whole sordid affair:

Trump, a turd emoji come to life, had some not-so-bon-mots in an interview with The Atlantic. Hair Trump offered of such doozies as “I’m having a lot of fun, considering what I do. You know, what I do is such serious stuff.” He presumably was referring to his golfing, which he has done 25% of his first 100 days fucking up everything else, which is unsurprising given the fact that he is a clueless fuck and he can’t cheat at everything else the way he cheats at golf. Grifty the Golfer also shared “The first time, I had two things to do – run the country and survive…the second time, I run the country and the world.” Huh? I think he left out an important letter in one word; clearly the word run should be RUIN.

The psychotic fruit bat in a badly fitting suit, with “hair” constructed of some 500 Barbie Dolls’ hair, had this to say when asked how he could still possibly believe he won the 2020 election against Joe Biden, who cleaned Dementia Trump’s clock in a real landslide:

“I’m a very honest person, and I believe it with all my heart. And I believe it with fact – you know, more important than heart. I believe it with fact.”

I believe it with fact? What the fuck does that even mean? If it actually meant something, it wouldn’t matter because he is always and only a lying sack of shit. Not-so-great Grandpa is not just soiling himself, he is covering all of us with shit. Get this man a Clorox enema, stat!

Washington, we have a problem.

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*Don golf-cheated instead of paying respect to soldiers whose bodies were returned home after giving their lives for their country while in Lithuania. He also golf-cheated on Easter Sunday right after lying to the public about bringing religion back to AmeriKKKa, instead of going to church. POTUS.

I. Mangrey reporting.