The End Of Something Is Nigh
October 10, 2024
Sometimes it’s fun, sometimes interesting, sometimes
depressing or even painful to look back and see what things were like after
significant events and changes have had their way with us. Sometimes you don’t
have to look back very far to recall a seismic shift while on the verge of
another seismic shift.
We take you back to the days of yesteryear…well,
yestermonth, exactly 10 months before E-Day 2024, when the literal fate of American
democracy is on the ballot. You may recall that back then a historically
impactful (in a positive way, unlike his disaster-ridden, Russian-asset opponent),
historically aged Joe Biden was making his case for a second term as president,
and running against the guy he trounced in 2020, though that guy insists
(knowing full well that he is full of shit and other less savory substances)
that he did not lose.
My how things have changed.
Biden has stepped aside to help protect America from another fatal second of a Trump presidency. The press, who spent so much time, so many columns, so much of their waning credibility, on how old and slow Joe Biden was, just lets the clearly demented, frascist, hateful, dishonest and frankly stupid – not to mention practically the same age as Biden – prattle on and on and on about crowd size, Hannibal Lecter and toilet flushing without so much as a what-the-fuck. And don’t even get me started on the long-disgustingly-withheld news that Trump not only gifted his sugar-daddy Vladdy with much-needed-here-at-home COVID testing during the height of the pandemic, but has been in close contact with the murderous thug since leaving office, which is likely just this side of treason. Oops, I started. But I’ll stop.
arMAGAdDON
January 5, 2024
Disgraced, twice-impeached, four-time-indicted (so far),
failed insurrection leader, Fifth-Amendment-dependent ex-one-term-president and
current professional defendant Donald Trump is planning to celebrate tomorrow
like it was the fucking Fourth of July and Christmas combined.
Tomorrow, of course, is the third anniversary of the
Trump-incited assault and siege on the United States Capitol – you remember the
United States, right? – which included the hunt for House Speaker Nancy Pelosi,
Vice President Mike Pence and countless others for the purpose of either
kidnapping, assault or assassination. The events of the day featured the brutal
assault of 140 members of law enforcement, defecating on the walls, and the
death of one of their fellow seditionist dipshits as she tried to breach the
last line of security between the insane, bloodthirsty Trump mob and members of
Congress, which resulted in the crazed intruder being shot dead by security.
Trump, et al naturally consider her a martyr – just like all those martyrs of
yesteryear who donned their gray uniforms and died while attempting to
overthrow the government of the United States in the name of protecting Nikki
Haley…I mean, slavery.
Trump has repeatedly called his cult members – the poorly
educated, the anti-democratic, the shamelessly violent salt scum of the
earth…you know, morons – heroes and political prisoners. He promises to pardon
each and every seditionist, insurrectionist, murderer and America-fucking
asshole convicted of myriad crimes against the United States on Trump’s
“orders” on January 6, 2021 – a date which will live in infamy. That is, unless
you are Donald Trump or one of his mentally and democratically deficient mob of
cretins (and I’m using that descriptor in the more technical, clinical sense –
i.e., an IQ between 50–69 and not merely as an ad hominem attack on a bunch of
idiots).
Weekend At Biden’s
Joe Biden on the other hand will be observing 1/6 like it
was Pearl Harbor or 9/11. Biden will officially launch his re-election campaign
today (instead of tomorrow due to predicted foul weather) at Valley Forge
(famous for its foul weather some years ago), warning the American people of
the fascist threat posed by his would-be opponent and his cult.
Whatever you might think about Biden, and though he often
fought against the middle class in favor of the filthy rich and corporations
throughout his career and was instrumental in allowing Clarence “Uncle” Thomas
to sit on the now-horribly-stained Supreme Court bench, Biden never fought
against the United States or our democracy, as did (and does) his presumptive Hitler-channeling
opponent this coming November.
From this reporter’s perspective, there is simply no
contest. I don’t care if Biden is 181 and kept alive by a room full of machines
and round-the-clock medical staff, or even by smoke and mirrors. I don’t care
if by Election Day he is Bernie from Weekend at Bernie’s. I’d sooner
vote for Kevin McCarthy – he’s not an evil, fascist, toxic narcissist
psychopath; he’s just a fucking spineless idiot.
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