The Fog of W

W: TF

Quagmire

March 19, 2015

My how time flies. It seems like only yesterday when team Cheney/Bush were asleep on the job - as warnings came from every corner of the globe (and since the globe -despite what people like Ted Cruz think - is round it has an infinite number of corners) - while a bunch of Saudis perpetrated the worst terror attack on American soil and then used this horrific event to launch their Dream War. But since nothing can deter the calendar from moving inexorably forward, here we are at the twelfth anniversary of the illegal invasion of Iraq on March 19, 2003, and this reporter cannot help but feel a bit nostalgic for the good old days. Add to this the heady prospect of another Bush (or Clinton) in the White House and you’ve got yourself one hell of a reason to party. Who could forget the weapons of mass destruction, I mean the ousting of ex-friend evil-doer Saddam Hussein, I mean the fight for the equality of Iraqi women, um... bringing democracy to the Middle East?…or whatever the hell the reason was for Operation Halliburton Greedom*? ?

As we see all around that region today, democracy in the Middle East is as plentiful as Saddam’s WMD in 2003. My guess is it’s buried in the sands of Syria, somewhere to the north, west, east and south of Saddam’s WMD. Good luck finding anything there. Former UN Secretary General, Kofi Annan recently said of the Middle East, “The…much more proximate cause of the instability we are witnessing today, was the invasion of Iraq in 2003.” To be fair, Annan was never a supporter of the illegal, ill-advised, poorly-carried-out invasion, so his assessment could be somewhat biased.

On March 23, 2003, just four days after having invaded Iraq, while he was still busy lying to the American public about the “need” for the invasion, George W. Bush told reporters, “If there is somebody captured, and it looks like there may be, I expect those people to be treated humanely...I expect them to be treated, the POWs, I expect to be treated humanely and uh, uh, just like we’re treating the prisoners we have captured humanely. If not, the people who have mistreated the prisoners will be treated as war criminals.” Where’s a mirror when you need one?

Iraqi prisoner being humanely treated at Abu Ghraib

“Those who make you believe absurdities can make you believe atrocities.”

Voltaire (1694-1778)

That same day the CIA was completing their 183^rd waterboarding of Kalid Sheik Mohammed. A few months later the International Committee of the Red Cross claimed that they had evidence that the US was holding people at black sites with no access to the Red Cross. I assume these secret prisoners were being treated and/or waterboarded humanely nonetheless. Hey we even treated those lazy prisoners to rectal feeding. What would you rather do, eat at McDonalds?

Two days later Secretary of Death and Destruction Donald Rumsfeld (Cheney’s mentor during the Nixon years), who Richard Nixon once called “a ruthless little bastard” said, "This war is an act of self-defence, to be sure, but it is also an act of humanity.... In recent days, the world has witnessed further evidence of their [Iraqi] brutality and their disregard for the laws of war. Their treatment of coalition POWs is a violation of the Geneva Conventions." Oh, the humanity!

We sentenced Japanese torturers to death for waterboarding American prisoners after World War II. The good news, according to Cheney’s hunting buddy Antonin Scalia, is that the Constitution does not appear to prohibit torture. When we do it. Scalia also wants you to ask yourself, “If we cannot have moral feelings against homosexuality, can we have it against murder?” Supreme Court Justice-for-life Antonin Scalia ladies and gentlemen - please tip your waitress and drive safely.

Do you know what an airplane is sir?

While debating Al Gore in 2000, candidate George W said, “I just don’t think it’s the role of the United States to walk into a country and say we do it this way, so should you.” That of course was several years before galumphing into Iraq, eyes closed and guns ablazing, and by both inference and deed, saying precisely to the Arab world, “We do it this way, so should you.” They’re doing it now. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

How can we forget you when your smell is everywhere?

And if you needed any further convincing of just how badly BushCo. screwed up over there, serial liar, all-around-sociopath and Fux News host Bill O'Reilly said on Tuesday night that the Iraq War was a "victory until President Obama mucked it up" by removing combat troops from Iraq. The removal of troops, as anyone who follows these sorts of things knows (or is just plain lying about), was based on the Status of Forces Agreement signed by one George W. Bush. If memory serves, he made this agreement before Obama was even elected to his first term – something George W. Bush will never be able to claim with any degree of truth. Muck you O’Reilly.

* Greedom: the unbridled ability of large, well-connected corporate entities or their ilk to do as they please, usually to the great detriment of the public at large.  Not to be confused in any way with FREEDOM and is not a typo.

I. Mangrey reporting. Oy.

To be continued…

And now a few words from Marvel Comics reluctant '70s superhero...

Howard The Duck

Where are you when we need you Howard? The hairless apes you tried so hard to help are descending into chaos. The inmates are running the asylum. It seems that only a duck of your talents can save us from ourselves. Maybe another presidential run - we cannot survive another Clinton or Bush.

He Actually Did Have Sex With That Woman

General David "Really Did" Petraeus

March 5, 2015

When you think penis problems in politics one man who leaps to mind is Anthony Weiner. Forget about Anthony Weiner, all he did was take pictures of his penis. Stupid? Yes. Endangering national security? No. Wiener is what is commonly referred to as a putz. He really only hurt himself and his wife. Enter David Petraeus, who rose to the rank of four-star general before becoming director of the CIA. Anthony Weiner was just a narcissistic congressman who dreamed of being mayor of New York City. He lost it all because he tweeted pictures of his pecker. Petraeus and his pecker gave away classified information to his mistress. While he was head of the CIA. 

Forget about Edward Snowden, all he did was try to notify the American public of some very questionable behavior by our government. Snowden is what is commonly referred to as a whistle-blower. Whistle-blowers are supposed to have certain protections. Otherwise everyone would just be following orders - and we all know how that tends to play out. 

Just like John Raines, who helped out J. Edgar Hoover's COINTELPRO and Daniel Ellsberg, who outed the Pentagon Papers, Ed Snowden committed an act of patriotism and has spent almost two years in Russia trying to avoid being tried for crimes against the United States under the Espionage Act. The Espionage Act has been invoked sparingly up until Obama came along. Barack Obama has been brutally harsh on whistle-blowers. Worse than George W. Bush - although two of the cases prosecuted under Obama’s watch were inherited from Bush II.  Maybe Obama’s just trying to look tough in the eyes of those hounding him to stop being black and president at the same time. Maybe he’s just a much bigger asshole than we imagine.

Edward Snowden, thinking about coming home

It appears that what David Petraeus did was much closer to treason than it was to whistle-blowing. The Justice Department claims it does not target legitimate whistleblowers who follow the rules, but cannot "sanction or condone federal employees who knowingly and willfully disclose classified information to the media or others not entitled to receive such information." I’m pretty sure the head of the CIA would be considered a federal employee. And I’m pretty sure his mistress was “not entitled to receive such information.” I wonder how the Commander in Chief will respond to such behavior - especially from the many he appointed CIA director. There was very likely some blowing taking place, but I seriously doubt there was a whistle involved in Petraeus’s case.

Snowden’s transgression was exposing crimes committed against the American people by our government...you know, people like General David Petraeus. Petraeus was finally brought down when his mistress, Paula Broadwell, sent threatening e-mails to a woman she feared threatened her affair with the general.

Petraeus and Broadwell in happier times. Such a cute

couple. I’m sure his wife was happy for them.

David Petraeus, after giving what is described as highly classified information to his mistress, is being allowed to cut a deal to avoid going to trial. He is ready to plead guilty to “unauthorized removal and retention of classified material.” In exchange the government won’t oppose his request to avoid prison, but will spank him with a $40,000 fine. He will not have to hide out in Russia.

During his very brief tenure as head of the CIA, Petraeus gave his mistress personal notebooks from his time as commander of coalition forces in Afghanistan, which “collectively contained classified information regarding the identifies of covert officers, war strategy, intelligence capabilities and mechanisms, diplomatic discussions, quotes and deliberative discussions from high-level National Security Council meetings… and discussions with the president of the United States.” According to the court papers the notebooks also contained “national defense information, including top secret…and code word information” - the kind of stuff someone like Edward Snowden would never have access to - clearly super secret stuff. 

You might also find interesting the fact that Petraeus maintained his security clearance after resigning in disgrace from the CIA. He still has it. Did I mention that Edward Snowden is hiding in Russia for leaking stuff that was mostly unclassified? Apparently, even the fact that Petraeus lied to federal investigators from his Langley office and is the defendant in a federal case has not affected his standing in the military community. And those who are outraged are keeping quiet since Petraeus is purported to have enough dirt on enough highly placed individuals to keep him safe in perpetuity. The general has conceded that he misled FBI investigators; Edward Snowden never lied to anyone. Snowden is reportedly considering returning to the U.S. if he can receive a fair trial. Maybe he can get some pointers on dealing with the American justice system from Petraeus. 

I’m sure the Republican’ts will finally abandon their ridiculous Benghazi/Unicorn hunt and turn their attention to this actual travesty. Or not. At least Snowden won an Oscar…sort of.

I. Mangrey reporting. None of this is classified.

John Boehner's Head: Wood Outside, Marshmallow Inside

John Boehner and his Giant Clown Gavel appear to be made of the same stuff.