Broken News – Fake America

Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid.

August 28, 2026

The already-rotting-soon-to-be corpse commonly known as Donald Jeffrey Epstein Trump, he of the deranged Sharpie is at it again. In the latest volley in his completely insane trade war with Canada, bedazzling in a fresh coat of Crayola, Dementia Don is throwing his over-weight around, believing he has won again by signing an executive order to rename Lake Ontario as Lake America.

Do not adjust your set or your meds.*

He painted himself that color.

This comes on the heels of the Navy announcing that it is considering reneging on naming an aircraft carrier after an actual war hero, considering instead naming the ship after the commander-in-crayon.

One imagines that jinxing such a vessel by naming it – presumably USS Bonespurs – after an insurrectionist, will probably see the carrier explode or simply sink under the weight of the stupidity responsible for this miscarriage of justice and sanity.

Conversely, Donald Trump shits his pants and surrenders on something every day, throws ketchup at the wall when his insurrection fails, and essentially raped countless women for a living.

By all means, name an aircraft carrier after this.

But really, could this mental patient sans treatment be any more clueless? Damaged Don actually posted this. On purpose.

Why yes, apparently he can be more clueless.

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*Well, you actually might want to adjust your meds. ENDITOL anyone? Rent-A-Coma? Someone definitely needs to adjust his meds though.
 

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled crushing disbelief.