Saturday, January 3, 2026

Don’t Cry For Us Venezuela

The Biggest Threat To America*

January 3, 2026


Donald “Death To America” Trump with his two most dangerous henchmonkeys

As if the danger Trump poses to America and the world had not been proven a thousand times over in 2025, this brand-new year is promising more of the same…if we’re lucky.

Unfortunately, our luck may have already run out. In a new wrinkle (i.e., crevasse) Donald “Death To America” Trump has decided that none of his other distractions from the five or ten or eleventy million more Epstein Pedo-files, featuring Trump more than anyone else including Epstein, are working. He needed to up his game, which is never good news for anyone else, maybe not even for him.

In the dead of night, which the very stable genius described as “dark”, Trump authorized – since no one else is permitted to do anything on their own – U.S. forces to unilaterally invade Venezuela and kidnap their president Nicolás Maduro and his wife. Granted, Maduro is a scumbag, so I guess it takes one to know one. And kidnap one. And throw geopolitics into more turmoil.

But don’t worry, the United States is the global idiot savant at managing ad lib, enforced regime change. Minus the savant.

One assumes we are being greeted as liberators as we speak.

Bumble, Bumble, Oil And Trouble

Naturally, Congress was not notified until presumably they saw it posted on “Truth” “Social”. Trump took time out from his busy shopping and golfing schedule to croak out a haltingly-read statement earlier today in which he explained

“We're there now, but we're going to stay until such time as the proper transition can take place. So we're going to stay until such time as – we're going to run it, essentially, until such time as a proper transition can take place...We're going to have our very large United States oil companies, the biggest anywhere in the world, go in, spend billions of dollars, fix the badly broken infrastructure, the oil infrastructure, and start making money for the country…”

Yeah, for “the country”. No doubt the selfless oil companies will pull Venezuela up by their bootstraps and have no intention whatsoever of taking those bootstraps and eventually wrapping them lovingly around Venezuela’s throat in order to asphyxiate them. Out of altruism, of course. And love.

Happy Fucking New Year.

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*It sure ain’t Venezuela. Or Mexico, which is next on Trump’s To Undo list.

I. Mangrey reporting.

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