Schmuck Screen

Pay No Attention To The Man Behind The Hurtin'

January 20, 2025

Not having any personal experience in such matters, it just seems to make common sense that, if you are embroiled in a horrific scandal, say there’s incontrovertible evidence that you were long-time best friends with a major child sex trafficker, and it even seems feasible that you might have in some way aided and/or abetted said child sex trafficker in his child sex trafficking. If you wanted to distract people from your scandal, wouldn’t you try to do things that made you look like a very good person? Admittedly, per our purely hypothetical example, there are few things more heinous than child sex trafficking, so theoretically almost anything would be less horrible, but wouldn’t it be smart to do things that were actually good, as opposed to merely less horrific?

Asking for a fiend.

To continue our hypothetical musing, what if you were the above individual, with virtually unlimited power, would you try to be seen helping the poor, or comforting the sick, or playing with children? Or would you instead invade and/or threaten other countries with invasion, kidnap foreign leaders, commit war crimes, shit all over our allies, encourage others in your charge to commit violence and murder against fellow citizens, or be seen cursing at fellow citizens? Would you do what the 9-11 terrorists could not do and perpetrate massive damage to the most revered symbol of our nation’s democracy? To me that seems like trying to take someone’s mind off a headache by cutting off their arm with a machete, as opposed to maybe giving them a massage. Not sure what caused all this to come to mind, but again, just asking.

Oh wait, I think I know what brought this up. but first, a word from our sponsor:

EPSTEIN
EPSTEIN
EPSTEIN

Yes, now I remember. Someone is desperately trying to make us all forget about

EPSTEIN

And this mental defective, instead of trying to hide behind good deeds, is trying to throw up a 9-11-type cloud of hazardous smoke to throw us off the scent. Well, guess what, besides being a really stupid strategy, it’s not fucking working. We will not forget about your fond memories of special secrets, pornographic birthday cards, and grooming little girls at Mor-on-Lago for your friend to use as product. We will also not forget all the disgusting, filthy, fascist deeds you keep committing for that and other nefarious reasons.

To be fair, we do know that he is wholly incapable of committing anything but heinous acts. If he ever even attempted an actual good deed, it would probably kill him. But what the heck, he might as well give it a try anyway.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled resistance.