July 28, 2024
Convicted felon and
Day-One-Dictator Donald Trump
“Christians, get out and vote. Just this time. You won’t
have to do it anymore. Four more years, you know what: it’ll be fixed, it’ll be
fine. You won’t have to vote anymore, my beautiful Christians. I love you
Christians. I'm a Christian. Get out, you’ve got to get out and vote. In four
years, you don’t have to vote again, we’ll have it fixed so good you’re not
going to have to vote.”
Gee, wonder what Trump meant by that – "cough"
Project 2025 "cough" In that moment all the angels lost their wings, slit their
ethereal wrists and Jesus said, “What the fucking fuck? That guy is a
Christian? I’m glad I’m not one. If these assholes ever thought I was coming
back to save their sorry asses, they can now just kiss that shit good-bye. I’m
not going anywhere near these hypocritical shitheads. Jesus H. Christ, what a
bunch of bullshit. Jesus out. All the fucking way out.”
Trump is waffling, in
preparation for whiffing, on showing up to debate his worst nightmare. Well, second
worst nightmare, the first being shunned by television cameras. This nightmare
is running against Kamala Harris. A woman. A woman of color (not a “colored woman”
as some in the Trump
camp have actually said in front of a camera). A woman who can laugh at things
that are funny instead of things that are psychotic. A woman who can dance
without looking like she’s having a difficult bowel movement. A woman who does
not pal around with dictators and douchebags. A woman with bigger and more functional balls
than he has. A woman who does not want to be a “dictator on day one.”
One thing Trump is not running away from, but is in fact
lumbering toward with what for him passes as vigor, is authoritarianism for
America.
No Newt Is Good Newt
Long-time pig and
ratfucker and wife-cheating disgraced ex-Speaker of the House Newt Gingrich is
worried that Kamala Harris “is going to pick nasty, mean, personal fights,
because they can't win any other than possibly with abortion on some terms.” Not
sure what happened to the end of that sentence other than it oozed from the
rotting and older-than-Joe-Biden brain of old Newt. Funny though, coming from
the party whose racist, rapist, fraudulent 34-count-convicted felon and
insurrectionist (oops, left out that whole stolen classified documents thingie)
leader/nominee is the most vile, nasty, mean personal attacker ever to
(dis)grace a presidential campaign. But, whatevs. You do you dickhead.
The other problem
with Newt noise is that it is extremely likely nasty, mean, personal fight
Harris might choose to pick with Disaster J. Trump will have the unique characteristic of being
absolutely based in fact. It’s not her fault that her (and America’s) opponent
is a slithering scumbag with not one single redeeming quality.
As I write this, Trump is busy making fun of Kamala Harris’ name. Class,
all the way. Low class. Bigly low class.
There is a very good
chance that should Trump
actually show up for a debate that he has said would be “easier than Biden,”
the former prosecutor Kamala Harris will make rancid ground beef out of the
already decomposing Trump.
And that my friends,
scares the Fascist/Trump Party to death.
This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled coma.
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