Charity (And Regime Change) Begins At Home
December 17, 2025
Donald
Trump is hell-bent on regime (and oil) change in Venezuela. He is not sure
whether this is necessary in order to distract the American public from the
Epstein Pedo-files or from his disastrous sabotage of the American economy.
A
large majority of Americans also favor regime change. But not in Venezuela.
This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought
For The Day.
Correction/Apology
December 16, 2025
While writing my pre-emptive obituary for the sniveling
shitbag Donald Trump, I spent a bit of time racking my brain for an animal that
would serve as a metaphor for the senseless, vile, grotesque and purposeless
monster who attacked the recently
murdered-under-the-most-tragic-of-circumstances Rob Reiner.
First I thought ‘pig’, but pigs are very smart. Then I
thought ‘rat’ but rats too are smart and when not radicalized by filthy city
environments make good pets. There’s no way Trump could survive a maze that any
rat worth its tail could navigate for a snack. Next, ‘snake’, but snake are
part of the food chain and generally don’t bother anyone unless threatened.
I finally settled on ‘tick’. But, as I thought about this
after the fact, I realized that as dangerous and seemingly unnecessary ticks
might seem, any damage they do is to a single person. If that person gets sick,
or even worse, that ends the chain of events.
Donald Trump, by all accounts is responsible for the deaths
of tens-of-thousands of Americans thanks to his gross mishandling of the
COVID-19 pandemic, and is currently murdering untold numbers of desperate and
starving people across the globe who depended upon the USAID program for food
and medicines until Trump, Musk, et al decided not only to cut of all this
desperately needed aid, but incinerated millions of dollars of supplies already
warehoused and just waiting to be distributed. Who the fuck does that? Not a
tick, I can tell you that.
So, as much as I fear and despise ticks, it was
irresponsible of me to even mention them in the same breath as Donald Fucking
Trump. It will not happen again…unless maybe I get Lyme Disease. But for now,
there is simply nothing vile enough to compare to Trump.
And By The Way
Rob Reiner had this to say after the assassination of the hateful
talking head Charlie Kirk
“Absolute horror and I unfortunately saw the video of it. It’s
beyond belief what happened to him. That should never happen to anybody. I
don’t care what your political beliefs are. That’s not acceptable. That’s not a
solution t o solving problems.”
Rob Reiner was, by all accounts except that of the human
poop emoji Trump, a mensch.
And By The Other Way
Dear Donald:
Because he had the good sense and decency to tell everyone
how dangerous and despicable you are, you accused Rob Reiner of suffering from
Trump Derangement Syndrome. Take a tip from the great Inigo Montoya
Ed Venture
Managing Editor
What
It Takes
December 16, 2025
Hey,
guess what gun freaks – guess what it took to stop a bad guy with a gun – a good
guy without a fucking gun.
In case
you missed it, as the mass murder at Bondi Beach in Australia was in progress, a
good guy – a really good guy – tackled one of the two assailants, took his fucking
weapon of mass death away from him and somehow, even though he himself had been
shot, did not blow the fucker’s brains out.
So fuck
you Wayne LaPierre wherever your sociopathic, cowardly, embezzling ass is.
Was that not in fact fun?
This has been your Paying Attention™ Fun Fact For The Day.
December 15, 2025
As if the latest mass shooting in America,
followed closely by the horrific deadly anti-Semitic terror attack on the Hanukkah celebration in
Australia were not painful enough, the world soon after learned of the heartbreaking
deaths of Rob Reiner and his wife Michele. Subsequently, one person, and one person only had nothing
but the most callous and vile filth to share with a world in mourning.
One of the most despicable, heinous figures in
world history just could not shut the fuck up and keep his inhuman, hate-filled
bile to himself. No, he had to spew his rancid verbal vomit into the public
domain. That of course was Donald Trump.
Trump does not care what comes out of his face
sphincter, and he seems able to say whatever the fuck he wants. I cannot say
the things I would like to say to or about him at this moment.
If anything was more painful than learning of the
gut-wrenching and tragic passing of Reiner and his wife, it was having to be
subjected to Trump’s disgusting response, which he unleashed simply because
Reiner spoke what was objectively true – at least according the vast majority
of Americans, if not people across the globe – that Donald Trump was a
disgraceful creature and a massive threat to the survival of this nation as a democracy
and a civil society.* But, as everyone knows, Trump can’t handle the truth.
There are very few if any other than Trump who
would have a discouraging word to say about Rob Reiner, who brought the human
experience, and especially joy and laughter to generations of audiences the
world over. I dare say the balance will be quite different when Donald J. Trump
draws his final stolen breath on this Earth for which he held such contempt.
To that end, although certainly wishing him no
harm before his rightful demise, I would like to be the first to share thoughts
on a life so horribly lived once the passing of the 45th and 47th
president of these United States is finally in the books.
Donald J. Trump passed on today, after a life of crime, punishment of others, and feckless destruction that, at long last, leaves in its wake a legacy of racism, rape, abject hatred of everyone and anyone who was not, in a word, Donald J. Trump. Words cannot express the absolute shame and filth this man brought to the world from his early days as an incorrigible brat until his last dying breath as a psychotic, greedy, power-mad revenge freak. This absolute snake of a man, with all the empathy and humanity of a tick spent far too long among us and will surely be reviled even by those with whom he will be sharing Hell for eternity. He was without a doubt an indelible stain on the human race. And it brings me no pleasure to say these things…okay, maybe a little.**
Good riddance to bad rubbish.
Where is the righteous Inigo Montoya when you
need him?
________________________________________________
*Whether it truly was this or not, for the most part, its people meant
or hoped it would be so.
**Okay, fine, a lot.
Ed Venture
Managing Editor
Potent Parables For One Thousand, Alex
December 15, 2025
Little Donny…I mean Johnny comes home from school one day.
His parents are concerned because they have just gotten a phone call from the
guidance counselor explaining that Donny…I mean Johnny is failing every single
subject. Bigly. They suspected as much since Donny…I mean Johnny stays up all
hours of the night glued to social media, sometimes rage tweeting hundreds of
posts in a matter of hours. They have seen some of the content, which has them
too scared to even confront the clearly damaged child. Not to mention the fact
that the parents had been told that their son was constantly dozing off in
class, only coming to when he heard his name mentioned, after which he
invariably launched into hateful ad hominem attacks against whoever he thought
was the culprit, be it classmate or teacher.
Donny…I mean Johnny’s mother once, one evening after a few
extremely necessary drinks, and out of earshot of her little sociopath, confided
to her husband, who was equally liquored up and horrified at his son’s
behavior, “I hate to even think this, but I tell you, if little Donny…I mean
Johnny was a dog I’d have him put down as a danger to those around him, or
maybe see if we could hire Kristi Noem. She knows what to do with a dangerous
animal.” The subject was never broached again. Mom and dad stopped drinking for
a while just to be safe.
When Donny…I mean Johnny came home that day, his mother
asked him how he was doing in math – just to keep it simple. Donny…I mean
Johnny, without batting an eye – or a brain – proudly blurted out, “A+”. Mom
jumped in, “A+?”, which was quickly countered with “A+++++.” This was
objectively absurd, like the boy’s repeated insistence that he could reduce a price
of something by “500% or 1100% or 1300%”, and like that claim, most likely
insane. Donny…I mean Johnny’s mom was at a loss for what to do next, and while
that alcohol-fueled notion of Donny…I mean Johnny as rabid animal flashed
through her mind once more, she – for the time being at least – just let it go,
hoping her cooler head would prevail. She recalled at that moment really
wanting a drink or a baseball bat, but resisted both.
All she came up with at that moment was, “How about if we
take a look at your report card?” Her beloved albeit horribly damaged son hit
back, “First of all, it’s none of your damn business, and besides it’s full of
fake grades. No one has ever been subjected to the level of unfair testing I
have to go through, because I’m so much smarter than everyone else and they
hate me for it. The teacher is too stupid to understand my answers, and I get
blamed for it. Nobody has ever been so badly mistreated as me. It’s probably
because that kid in last year’s class screwed up the whole grading curve. And
also, my report card is under audit right now, so maybe once that’s over with
we can talk about letting you see it then. But the answer will still be no. Now
go to bed, I have a very busy night ahead of me.”
What would you do if you had to deal with a boy like Donny…I
mean Johnny?
It’s Not Just A House, It’s A Home…Our Home...And It's Our Fucking House
December 14, 2025
Naturally,
when things go awry we respond. Be it with disbelief, denial, grief, fear,
loathing, anger, sadness, despair, or even discorporation. At some point, at
least according to mental health professionals, we must reconcile, perhaps
forgive, but at the very least we must find a way to move on.
However,
there are certain things that must not be forgotten, no matter how painful, no
matter how great the need to cleanse the mind, bury the memory, and attempt to put
things behind us.
There
is a fine line though as regards the timing of the need to relegate things to a
safely sequestered out-of-mind place. While the immediate release and relief
that might come with putting things in the past, it is not healthy to push
something uncomfortable out of consciousness too soon.
It is with this in mind that Paying Attention™ feels we must disrupt any misguided, purposeful or otherwise, and however satisfying attempt to shoo away the memory of the wanton destruction of the People’s House by a swinish conman, sexual predator and adjudicated rapist, (alleged, though not for long) pedophile, and 34-time convicted felon.
We
must not let this image, this much-too-on-the-nose symbol of Trump’s thus far
successful attempt at total demolition of, not just the symbol of the Great
American Experiment, but of our actual system of government and way of life.
America would do well to keep this near front of mind…
until it is returned to its former state
Feel
free to forget this instead
Remember her? Don’t
bother.
This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.
Well,
That Sure Woke The Old Fucker Up
December 13, 2025
Rapist Donald Trump
went on a posting freakout just minutes after the latest release by Congress of 95,000 photos from fellow rapist and renown sex trafficker Jeffrey Epstein's estate.
Some photos include
Bill Clinton, Woody Allen, Bill Gates and two-month-long-NYC-garbage-strike-in-human-form,
Steve Bannon* – another close friend and confidant of the psychotic sex
trafficker Epstein. These photos also show Trump with different women and the
late sex offender as well as a photo of Trump-branded condoms (below). Just what
every real dick needs.
Just one of 95,000 images turned over by the Epstein estate
It is not yet known
if Trump liked to call them “Dondoms”, but who cares, let’s just assume so.
Trump reportedly refused to wear condoms while fucking and/or raping various women, causing him to refer to his late
1960s and early 1970s sexual exploits and risking STDs as “my Vietnam”. Nice one Pvt. Bonespurs.
Trump shat out 21
different posts in seven minutes, including memes and videos celebrating himself and what he claims as his achievements.
About Those
Pedo-files
You might recall
that Trump, who promised on the campaign trail to release all the Epstein files,
then “decided” against doing so and vigorously attempted to keep them hidden,
was forced to sign Jeffrey Epstein Transparency Act into law. That started a
countdown clock requiring the Department of Trump’s Version of Justice to make
all Epstein Pedo-files public by December 19, 2025. Trump continues to do
everything he can to distract the American people from Epsteingate. You would
not be unwise to expect a land invasion of Venezuela on or around December 18,
2025.
Remember, there is one person (maybe two, if you count AG Spam Bondi) who has untouchable power to release any and all Epstein files any time, including months ago. The name of that individual is Donald Fucking Trump. Perhaps someone should tell him that during one of his increasingly rare and brief waking moments.
More, apparently
much more, to come.
____________________________________________
*Bannon himself is in possession of oodles evidence he generated in the
creation of a five-part film series he claims he wiil be releasing next year.
This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.
We now return you to your regularly scheduled convulsions.
America
is struggling to survive a massive and deadly ICE storm. Thanks to Trump’s drastically and
cavalierly under-qualified, absurdly overpaid ICE-stormtroopers, It’s
Completely Eviscerated. Perhaps one day we will be able to rescue and
resuscitate the body politic, but currently it is in critical condition,
heading toward coma. It's Completely Eviscerated.
The ICE Storm is but one small fraction of what Donald Trump is destroying; the proverbial tip of the fucking ICEberg. His so-called policies, which comprise nothing more than myriad ways of enriching himself financially, being a celebrity, and raw, unbridled, utterly senseless power constitute a Category 42 shitstorm crushing everything in its path . From food and product safety, to general affordability (not a con job), to affordable health insurance, food assistance, to climate crisis, the survival of small farms and our food supply, our overall economy, vaccine availability, cancer research, reproductive rights for women, civil rights, the distribution of wealth, free and fair elections, democracy, the Constitution, the Supreme Court, the entire federal government, our standing on the world stage, to the literal fucking White House, and our collective sanity,* there is not a single aspect of life this treacherous cretin and his egregious enablers have not already seriously damaged, some almost beyond recognition.
It's Completely Eviscerated.
Unless of course you’re a fan of child sex trafficking and rape, infectious disease outbreaks, pardoning major drug traffickers** and other undeserving ne’er-do-wells, government-sponsored extortion, racism, war crimes, massive corruption and self-dealing, fascism, Russia, or useless, opulent ballrooms and other self-aggrandizing monuments.
Freak
out…
I
mean, Peace Out.
________________________________________________
*And that’s just off the top
of my head.
**Trump has pardoned more giant drug dealers than any president
in history (90 so far).
This has been your Paying Attention™ Fraught
For The Day Year.
We apologize for your attention to this matter.
December 11, 2025
On the
left you might recognize professional cosplay dress-up queen, Secretary of
Homeland Security and bitch-murdering-dog...I'm sorry, I meant dog-murdering-bitch
Kristi Noem, seen here in 2025 lying to Congress. The completely different-looking person on the right is none other
the long lost face of Kristi Noem from 10 years and some unknown number of
drastic, mostly unsuccessful “cosmetic” procedures earlier, likely lying to someone else .
Bet her
mother couldn’t pick her out of police line-up.
This is her face. This is her face on South Park.
Get the picture?
Apparently not
wanting to lie to Congress and the American people anymore that day, Noem used
her last lie to claim she had to leave the hearing for a meeting. That meeting
had already been canceled. Now, she needs to be canceled.
Was that not in fact fun?
This has been your Paying Attention™ Fun Fact For The Day.
