Schmuck Of The Day – Who Da Boss?

Secretary Of Defensiveness

July 12, 2025

This one’s kind of a toss-up, but we’re going with the underling-in-charge this time. Our uncertainty will be obvious by the end here, so feel free to disagree, but either way we’re up to our eyeballs in stupidity, chaos and peril.

Pete Kegseth, the very defensive secretary, and by all accounts the least competent… When he’s not busy day drinking or primping for the cameras in his specially built make-up room in the Pentagon, he’s doing The Lard’s work yelling – like a late-night-drunk waiting for an “escort” two hours past closing time at his third dive bar of the evening – at reporters who dare mention facts in his pathetic presence, or lawmakers who dare question his inept and/or absurd actions, his unparalleled ignorance, his dangerous incompetence or his almost Trumpian ability to lie through his booze…I mean teeth.

By all appearances, Kegseth unilaterally cut off funding to Ukraine a week or so ago – without telling Dear Doddering Leader.

When Dumb Don was asked by a reporter why the funds were halted, he claimed ignorance:

Reporter: “Who ordered the pause [in military aid to Ukraine] last week?”

Dumb-ass Don: “I don’t know. Why don’t you tell me?”

I know I am, but what are you? Maybe you should be president. Large, but not so much in charge apparently. 

And then the demented follow-up, days later:

Different Reporter: “What does it say that such a big decision could be made inside your government without you knowing?”

Same Dumb-ass Don: “Uh, I would know. If a decision was made I will know. I’ll be the first to know, in fact most likely I give the order, but I haven’t done that yet.” (actual quote)

Uh, what the fuck? Somebody call those nice young men in their clean white coats to come and take him away, this guy’s brain is goo. Maybe he’s got hisself one o’ them thar brain worms, or maybe they’s a rabbit munching away in there. He’s like a boxer who’s been knocked out but his body hasn’t figured it out yet.

While ignorance is the order of the day in this administration, in this case the stench of dishonesty and incompetence is bordering on fatal. Certainly for Ukraine (and by extension Europe?), and likely for this country.

Fool me once, shame on you. (Try to) Fool me twice, go fuck yourself.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Schmuck Of The Day.  

Thought For The Day – WTFer

A Fucker Is Born Every Minute

July 11, 2025

It is considered bad form to make fun of the mentally disabled... unless of course the mentally disabled person in question has made a career out of making fun of everyone else, including disabled people. Oh, and has also cheated, lied, raped, incited a coup, and is well on the way to disabling, if not destroying, democracy right here in the good old U S of A, and currently has masked, armored, heavily armed forces terrorizing and occupying an American city – Los Angeles – where nothing is going on, for no reason other than instilling fear in the populace and local authorities.

U.S. battle-ready troops in Somalia… Oops, it’s Los Angeles

Even so, one might do well to stay above the fray and leave dumb enough alone. Not out of fear, though it seems that would be entirely justified given the ongoing and expanding terror campaign, but out of simple human decency.

We Would Never…

Being overly woke here at Paying Attention™, it would be completely out of character to make light of the fact that Damaged Don Trump is suffering from a rapidly accelerating mental decompensation. Or to not insist that it is unfair to put too much stock in his cognitive decline since his brain has been on the fritz for a very, very, long uh-time.

Mentally disabled doddering, “dancing” dipshit (or so it's been said)

We would never laugh hysterically at someone who routinely stammers, mispronounces, demonstrates a Homer Simpson-esque level of ignorance, and walks like a penguin with its shoelaces tied together. Laughing at a poor, demented, sniveling sad sack-of-shit like that would be rude and unprofessional.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

In The Shadow Of Trump Glower

From Freedom To Freedoom

Monument seen on the National Mall

July 8, 2025

As the dust from the worst July 4^th began to settle a bit, thanks to the signing into law(lessness) of one of the worst, most sweeping and historically unpopular pieces of shit…I mean legislation ever foisted upon the American public, some thoughts and prayers...I mean words made their way to press.

To be fair, it is not as bad as the genocide and slavery/racism that comprise the very foundation of this nation, but it will rank very high on the list of things that should never have happened in this country.

Freedom in America has always been conditional, but the arc of America’s moral universe has generally bent toward justice, with the goal (for some at least) being to one day live in a nation where people “will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character” as Martin Luther King, Jr. told us from the steps of the Lincoln Memorial, steps that would later need to be hosed off and decontaminated after being desecrated by one of the most racist, autocratic and downright grotesque politicians in American history. A man of artificial color, an anomalous shade of bile, fake hair and a raging disdain for anyone not him.

This thing called Trump, intent on furthering his Death-To-America policy with his horrifying Project 2025 and its legislative assassin – the Orwellian-named (I can’t say it, but it rhymes with Pig-Doody-Filled Kill) signature policy potpourri, has taken what freedom we have achieved over 250 years on this continent, and turned it into FREEDOOM.

At no extra cost to you the nauseated taxpaying citizen, say hello to multi-generational crushing national debt, possible multi-generational personal debt all in service to completely unnecessary tax cuts for the richest among us, violent, immigrant-hating ICE gestapo funded more than almost every other country’s armed forces, revoked medical insurance for some 15 million Americans*, food taken from the mouths of needy children (it’s like taking candy from a baby, which might be next), rising health care and utility costs for everyone, accelerated environmental destruction, the end of competent and critical severe storm warnings, unregulated AI for the next 10 years, and so much more you would surely rather not hear about. In a word, FREEDOOM.

Also, free measles, bird flu, covid and whatthefuckever for everyone. Get yours today.

As if all this was not enough, get ready for a un-asked-for third term for the cretin who brought you all the previously mentioned goodies, once Roberts and Alito figure out a work-around of that pesky Constitution - nothing has stopped them from pissing all over it so far.

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*Now with real concentration camps! Just as Keith Olbermann predicted nearly two years ago:

“And where do these detained non-citizens go? These places would in fact be camps, of some kind, and the living arrangements would necessarily be cramped, crowded, congested, confined — oh, what IS the word I’m looking for?

Concentrated!

That’s it! The camps would be concentrated.

Camps. With Concentration.”

Olbermann did not however predict the camps would have catchy names (and merch) like Alligator Auschwitz Alcatraz. U.S. Oy! U.S. Oy! U.S. Oy!

I. Mangrey reporting. Free (for now) but not doomed (yet).

Undependence Day

July 4, 2025

The staff here at Paying Attention™ will not be celebrating the Fourth of July this year. There is no joy in Trumpville today. All of us here will be on democracy suicide watch. Too much shit. Too many fans. Independence Day will have to be put on hold until such time as America can recover from hoisting itself with its own petard.

America’s own petard

This Fourth of July will henceforth be known as Undependence Day. While we remain untethered from the British Crown, we may very well be in worse straights today than we were in 1776. Our nation’s fate is currently in the tiny hands of a 34-time convicted felon, life-long con artist and long-time rapist who incited an insurrection against the United States. He is spending his likely ill-gotten presidency exacting revenge on everyone his twisted, paranoid, brutish “mind” believes ever did anything unpleasant to him. Oh, and let’s not forget all the crime and personal profit Trump is creating while pretending to be president.

This human poop emoji is spending most of the 75% of the time he is not cheating at golf by selling favors and pardons, bibles, craptocurrency, Chinese cell phones with his stupid name stamped on them, his new, over-priced, I’m guessing fart-scented cologne (which is unsurprisingly festooned with a tiny golden statue of you-know-who), and very likely national security secrets, which one assumes his continues to steal on a regular basis. Trump, all by himself, is currently the top 40 most corrupt presidents in American history.*

Musical Interlude

 Steppenwolf – Monster

Fuh King Monsters

Our life has been handcuffed to a ticking timebomb, our liberty has been assaulted nearly to death and our pursuit of happiness has been rendered inoperative by this sniveling shit-stain who has taken the tater out of dictator. And he is nowhere near finished destroying and dis-mentaling these United States.

Big Murderous Bill

“Death-To-America” Don forced his cult members and other assorted cowards in the Fascist/Trump Party to ram through one of the most backward-looking, economically and socially damaging, and staggeringly unpopular, even among many of the mindless fucksters who voted for the dumpster-fire-of-a-bill (probably without ever reading it), dumpster-fire-of-a-bill so the Fuh King can sign what might be America’s death warrant into “law” on what used to be Independence Day. 

Complete and utter billshit. Kill baby kill. Kill the poor, kill the environment, kill people of color, kill democracy. The moniker 'Independence Day' will have to be reclaimed, possibly with, as Thomas Jefferson said in response to the Shays Rebellion of Massachusetts farmers protesting economic injustice and lack of representation, “the blood of patriots and tyrants.”

“The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.”
                                Thomas Jefferson, 1787

This high-speed ride on a brakeless train is only just beginning, barring some miracle, and many of us, crazy-glued to our seats, can easily see that the rails have been blown to smithereens a little ways ahead.

The only thing America in the year 2025 is independent of is the democracy (such as it was and is) for which the Revolutionary War was fought.

Okay, so this the extent to which we will acknowledge America's Independence Day…

Larson - Washington Crossing the Street
(He’s now wishing he’d been run over by a bus)

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*This statistic is completely made up, and yet at the same time, likely understating the case. Either way, who gives a flying fuck if it’s made up at this point?

I. Mangrey reporting.

What’s That I Smell?

Fart Proudly*

July 2, 2025

Wish you were near enough to King Donald to smell his glorious anal vapors? Of course you do – you’re a MAGAt. It is well known that your favorite president of all time emits a number of aromas from various orifices. Each scent is unique. Each can make roses hide their blossoms in shame. Sure it looks like wilting, that’s just what the fake news wants you to believe.

Dear Leader Don wants everyone to have the privilege to inhale bigly of his fast-food-fueled flatulence whenever they want to. Well, that is everyone who still has $249 to shell out.

(Figurine hands are actual size)

The guy whose basement is where these coveted gasses are bottled wanted to call the new fragrance Smells Like Spleen Spirit, but the gas man wanted to call it Victory. And what Donny wants, Donny gets. Just ask Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts.

Why do you think they call him “John”? because he’s repeatedly full of shit, that’s why.

SPECIAL OFFER!!!!!!
C'MON SUCKERS

Just in time for Donald Trump Day, formerly known as Independence Day, this brand new stench can be yours for a song…and $249…and you can keep your lousy song if you want. And for just one dollar more, you can get every record ever recorded.

Act now and get an ICE crusher!

Tune in Friday for a special Paying Attention™ holiday edition.

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*Title of a Benjamin Franklin book.

Thought For The Day

Finally

July 1, 2025

This morning I walked a mile in my shoes. Now I know what it feels like.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Thought For The Day.

You're welcome.

What is your thought for the day?

Pic Of The Day – Hair Of The Dog

“Hair” Today, Gone* Tomorrow

June 29, 2025

No doubt he will blame this on showerheads, windmills and Joe Biden…

Looks like Don’s comb-over-and-over-and-over is close to being over

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*Hopefully not just the “hair”.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Pic Of The Day.

Noocular Combat, Toe-To-Toe With The Iranians

It Blowed Up Real Good...Or Did It

June 26, 2025

SURPRISE!!

Every fucking thing our War King Stiff president said about his impulsive bombing of Iran’s nuclear facilities was a fucking lie. After distracting us with another of his patented “I’ll let you know in two weeks”, Disaster Trump surprised everyone (except Iran) by ordering the bombing of three of Iran’s most crucial (as far as we know) nuclear enrichment sites.

Let’s run down the lies relating to this particular episode of Celebrity Asshole:

There was no immediate threat of anyone getting nuked by Iran. The human disaster made his decision against all intelligence – both professional and what little he personally possesses – according to reports, based on a “feeling”. One need probably not be reminded that the “feeling” was that of a paranoid, sociopathic, immensely ignorant autocrat with dementia.*

While the targets may have actually been hit, the primary target was not “completely and totally obliterated” as Damaged Don claimed. Add to this the likely fact that Iran had already moved all the good stuff in anticipation (thanks to Don’s two-week-two-step) of the attack.

Iran’s nuclear program, which had been possibly neutered by an agreement brokered by the Obama administration, then scuttled out of spite by Trump, was not ended once and for all by Don’s bombs; it may have been set back a few months at best. According to US intelligence, Iran’s stockpile of enriched uranium and not destroyed…the centrifuges are largely “intact”. Again with the fucking intelligence? What about the “feelings”?

There was no actual ceasefire as Donny Fuckface claimed. Maybe he should have considered talking to someone other than his mirror before announcing a ceasefire between two other parties. Apparently, it was only a concept of a ceasefire…and a shitty concept at that.

Perhaps the most likely scenario at this point is that Iran rescued their nuclear material, their machinery is either still intact or soon-to-be-repaired, and they will appear to behave very well for the next 6-12 months while secretly developing their very own nuclear bomb – on Trump’s blind watch, thereby protecting themselves against future threats to their safety.

Dumbass Don showing how to surrender like a real man

Trump of course, will blame Biden.

And this fuckwit keeps whining about how much he deserves a Nobel Peace Prize. He does deserve a No-balls Putz Prize.

Lastly, when Der Furor angrily croaked that Iran and Israel “don’t know what the fuck they’re doing” because they were not playing along with Don’s phony cease fire, he was, as always and only, talking about himself.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FJt5ccnZstU
Martin Mull – Bombed Anyway

Maybe Don should stick to what he’s good at – brain damage and domestic terrorism.

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*I too have a feeling, but it is vastly different than his.

I. Mangrey reporting. What’s your excuse?

Pic Of The Day – It Is Happening Here

Not A Thousand Words, But Worth It   

June 25, 2025

Found on the internet. Posted without comment*

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*Well, I was going to post this without comment, I really was. But then, before the digital ink was dry enough to go to press, wouldn’t you know, a bunch of non-uniformed, masked, armed Storm-Trumpers in southern California ganged up on, brutally assaulted and detained a 5’6”/150 lb. immigrant father of three – count ‘em, three – United States Marines (one veteran, two active duty). These ICE thugs, under direct orders of a thuggier thug – Trump – maced Narciso Barranco, dislocated his shoulder, and dragged him away from his job landscaping a local i-Hop, and then lied about Barranco assaulting them. The i-Hop manager witnessed the assault and told a reporter that Mr. Barranco did not in any way assault the “officers”. So yeah, STOP THIS FUCKING NAZI SHIT.

This has been your Paying Attention™ Pic Of The Day.