Intellectual Shutdown, Whose Default Is It?

Shutdown, DC

October 11, 2013

The Tea Party's self-proclaimed uber patriots are plainly off their meds. Not that they were working very well to begin with. They are flailing about more than usual, even pissing off their principal benefactors, the Koch Brothers. But still, you can't help but wish the worst feel sorry for the poor little guys and gals. Like most small children they simply don't understand the complexities of the world and are convinced everything revolves around them. They just want to be loved, feared and worshipped like any other god-like figure - self-imagined or otherwise. After all they are the ones who know what's right. So why shouldn't they be ordained to re-create this nation in their own image? They know what they want and they know when they want it.

Rep. Marlin Stutzman (R-IN)

"We're not going to be disrespected. We have to get something out of this.

And I don't know what that even is." 

These soon-to-be-forgotten-folk-heroes pretend to be looking out for the little guy, except their grassroots movement for liberty and freedom is funded by people like the Koch Brothers, whose sole purpose in life is to use their inherited fortune to own America and its government. These Koch fiends are of the very ilk that inspired the Boston Tea Party - corporate robber barons. Though to be fair, our current Supreme Corporation Court has decided to bestow personhood on corporations. If corporations are people, most of them are clearly dangerous sociopaths that come from grossly dysfunctional families and should immediately seek professional help. I'm sure our tax dollars would cover the expenses…as usual.

Uncle Sam says "uncle" to Stockholm syndrome

This modern-day Symbionese Liberation Army, instead of taking some heiress hostage has taken our entire democracy to a completely disclosed location and are currently in the process of waterboarding it in plain sight. These uncanny political strategists shut down the federal government they so despise but were shocked to find that the federal government actually does quite a few things real people appreciate, such as ensuring poor single moms can feed their children, keeping national parks open for anyone to enjoy, Medicare, Social Security, veterans' benefits, stuff like that. Who knew?

These same buffoons then go and harass park rangers for keeping people out while they're in shutdown mode. It's not voter ID we need, we need some kind of testing to keep the severely mentally challenged from holding office, at least at the federal level. We cannot let the Virgil Starkwell of politics to hold a gub to our heads, and expect us to abt natural while they Take The Government and Run.

These are the climate change deniers. These are the federal government default deniers. These are the sworn enemies of reality. But they’re just so damned funny to watch. Just like those adorable gremlins in the movie:

Just don't get them wet or expose them to elected office or they become:

This latest batch must have wet themselves pretty badly by the looks of things. With patriots like these, who needs terrorists? It seems no one can stop them but themselves. Thankfully it appears they are well on their way to doing just that.

I. Mangrey reporting.

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