October 27, 2018
America’s most inciteful president took to the Rose Garden
to splain the bomb stuff to an anxious nation.
Chrump, who has told rally goers to “knock the crap out of” anyone who
dared speak out against him, who has joke about killing journalists, explained
that he is against violence and is simply shocked that anyone would send bomb
stuff to people he wants locked up, deported or beaten up, but probably not
killed.
Chrump
pollutes Rose Garden
“All of my supporters are not necessarily supporting
me. Most of them are not. There is only
me. I talk to many thousands, maybe
millions of people every day at my incredible rallies, but these people are not
me. I have nothing to do with any of
these people. I am just the prezident,
nothing more, nothing less. None of this
is my fault. I know better than anyone,
this bomb guy is a secret Muslim just trying to make Donald Chrump look
bad. I’m not a bad guy. I fact, I’m the least bad guy you’ve ever
met. I did not put those pictures on
that guy’s van who did the bomb stuff.
You sure can’t prove that I did. Or
that he did. Could have been George
Soros…or some guy who weighs 400 pounds living in his mother’s basement. And I in no way told him who to put in the
crosshairs. I have no idea where people
come up with these ideas to attack people I say are trash or need to be locked
up. I’m a very nice guy, probably the
nicest guy anyone has ever met. I love
everyone, even Crooked Hillary, that Kenyan guy who made fun of me, the Jewish
guy with all the money who hates me, stupid, fat Michael Moore, and especially
Beautiful Lyin’ Ted Cruz. Love ‘em. And I love the poorly educated. And boy, do they ever love me. And who could blame them.
If the van is tickin', don't bother
This guy, who may or may not be crazy, no one knows how all
those pictures got on his van, or how someone made it look like he sent a very
small number of bombs, very small bombs I might add – the fake news never talks
about that, about how few and how small these so-called bombs were. He could have send hundreds or thousands of
bombs but he didn’t. Just a few small,
little bombs. Big deal. They say he loved Chrump. So what?
Everyone loves Chrump. We may
never find out exactly how this radical left-wing nut showed up at so many of
my rallies. Not if I have anything to
say about it, and I’m pretty sure I have a lot to say about it.
Why would I want someone to bomb the people I was screaming
at and threatening all these years? This
bomb stuff is very bad for Chrump. Very
bad for my midterm election that I am winning very big right now. I can’t wait to show you the map after I win
the midterms. I’ve always been good at
midterms. I taught my teachers so
much. I have a famous scientist uncle
who I met several times. I’ve been doing
so well since I singlehandedly got Brew Kavanaugh to run the Supreme Court, very
well. So well.
I think the fake news should be investigated very
strongly. I will make sure that happens
right after the Red Wave, and right after Jeff Sessions has no job. I will not fire him, that I can tell you, or
will I? We’ll just have to wait and
see. I won’t fire him probably, but I
will make sure I have my own very good Attorney General who will not use the
recuse excuse. No recusing. No COLLUSION.
I will make the Attorney General great again.
A very stable genius
I'm not responsible for anything that I or anyone who supports me does. I am toning it down so if the very unfair, incredibly fake
news does not start behaving right, I might have to tone it up. Then you’ll all be sorry. I will shake the fake right out of them.”
I. Mangrey, just reporting ‘em the way I see ‘em.
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