Disrespect This Elder…With Extreme Prejudice

September 12, 2021

I guess this is the new thing: Ratpublicans are going to play Chicken Little for every single fucking election from here to eternity. Turmp did it constantly throughout the 2016 election season, and again for about two years prior to getting unquestionably crushed by Joe Biden in 2020. Turmp and other fascist fuckers are at it again – preparing for the impending California governor recall by preemptively whining that the election is rigged. This has now become a raison d'être for Ratpublicans, who without benefit of all manner of anti-democratic machinations would have trouble winning elections for dog catcher in most parts of this country. They damn sure would never have a majority in the House.

George H.W. Bush was the last Ratpublican to have won the popular vote for president. His idiot son does not count since he “achieved” his incumbency by virtue of being appointed president by the Extreme Court after they stopped Florida (whose governor at the time was Jeb Bush, and whose secretary of state was Katherine Harris, who infamously – and illegally – purged Florida’s voter rolls of some 100,000 mostly black voters) from actually counting their votes, though he still lost the popular vote the first time around. Instead of risking legitimate elections, Ratpublicans are happy to replace faith in elections with insane lies and voter suppression and disenfranchisement.

And, just in case poisoning the well ahead of time is not enough to guarantee their pyrrhic victory, Ratpublicans are not afraid to stop vote counting, threaten election officials and/or mount fraudulent election audits. They are secure in their knowledge that any election they win is legitimate and any election they lose was merely a result of rigging, cheating and voter fraud, which every single study and investigation has shown does not exist to any significant extent, and to the extent it does occur, is almost always by Ratpublican voters. Recall that they sent a mob of paid white men in suits to sabotage the counting of votes in Florida, setting the stage for the Extreme Court to step in and illegally appoint George WTF Bush.

Right now the totally psychotic talk-radio host Larry Elder, who has made a career of espousing white supremacist talking points, is chirping about how the upcoming recall election in California is rigged. Elder, who recently opined that descendants of slave owners are the ones who deserve reparations, not the descendants of slaves, because – and I am not making this shit up – at the time, slavery was legal and slave owners had their property and livelihood taken from them with no compensation whatsoever. Move over Ben Carson, whose statement that slave ships were filled with hopeful immigrants with dreams of a better life in the New World, seem almost quaint in comparison. I said ‘almost.’

Did I mention that like Ben Carson Larry Elder is not white? Larry Elder is not white. In fact, to the untrained eye, he appears to be of African heritage, but only because of the color of his skin, not by the content of his character. Elder is the current frontrunner should Gavin Newsome lose his bid to avoid being recalled. Elder also insists that there were “shenanigans” in the 2020 presidential election and has been accused by his ex-fiancée of waving a gun at her.

And lastly, Elder is a huge fan of Stephen Miller, Turmp’s top nazi/advisor/screech writer, and thinks Miller should be president. Of the United States. Of America.

This has been a Paying Attention Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled angst.