Sunday, June 2, 2019

Stable Boy

It’s All Schmuck and Mirrors

June 2, 2019
It appears that previously self-proclaimed “very stable genius” Donald Chrump has, for no discernable reason, upgraded himself to “extremely stable genius.”  No one but Chrump and some number of single-digit IQ devotees believes either version of this demented, narcissistic fantasy, but Chrump needs only one person to believe this drivel…assuming that even he believes anything that comes out of his face sphincter.
A number of psychologists have signed a statement claiming that Chrump actually meant to say, “I am an extremely stable JELL-O.”  According to one signatory Dr. W. Plezure, “This would make much more sense given his artificial color, artificial ingredients and complete lack of substance.  To be honest, I do not believe that Mr. Chrump could tell the difference between a genius and a bowl of JELL-O…even if they were clearly labeled.  Mr. Chrump’s relationship with reality is strikingly similar to the relationship between JELL-O and anything vaguely resembling a natural substance.  I have to wonder if he actually bathes in it, given his skin and hair color.” 
To be fair, beside the artificial flavors, colors and sweeteners, the main ingredient of JELL-O is gelatin, made from boiling the bones and hides of animals – many of which are partially natural, if you ignore all the hormones, steroids and otherwise chemically-enhanced feed.  All of this does sound like something Chrump would crave, if not Chrump himself.
Even Chrump’s “intelligence” is artificial, but not like all the artificial intelligence you hear about.  Since, as has been made painfully clear, Chrump is incapable of learning, and therefore of having actual intelligence, he is known to simply memorize whatever he sees on Fux News and parrot that garbage at his next rally, press tantrum or toilet tweeting session.  I suppose this could be considered a form of intelligence, but it is a stupid intelligence.
Chrump does look like a large blob of JELL-O that rolled under the bed, covering itself in orange fuzz, maybe from a family of shedding cats. 
Unintentional Chrump “hair” donor
I. Mangrey relaxing.

No comments:

Post a Comment