Saturday, December 28, 2024

Broken News – Missing Person Edition

Gone, And Mostly Forgotten

December 28, 2024

Contrary to popular opinion, irresponsible rumor and rampant hope, JD Vance is alive and well.

The long-invisible Trump VP was recently spotted at the annual Army-Navy game alongside his convicted felon/ex-president/president-elect boss, and NY subway vigilante Daniel Pennies, the Marine veteran recently acquitted of criminally negligent homicide for murdering Jordan Neely, a homeless black man. As far as Vance and Trump are concerned, anyone who kills a black man is okay by them, especially when they get away with it and don’t require a Trump pardon.

Soon after this proof-of-life public appearance, Vance once again disappeared into the void. A new search is being mounted for some inexplicable reason.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled binge watching.

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