Narcissus Shrugged

Unpardonable Sins

April 14, 2018

The Beginning of The End

The producers of The Apprentice thought they were putting on a farce. They thought it was a great joke. They took a public icon-turned-buffoon, built him a fake Hollywood boardroom – they said his actual boardroom was a shithole – a fake company, he had overseen numerous bankruptcies – and launched an absolutely ludicrous fake reality show. Unfortunately, they sorely misunderestimated the American public. Many people apparently looked at the phony, multiply bankrupted moron, and said, “Wow, look how rich and bossy this guy is. That’s awesome.” Millions could not look away. I simply could not look.

The Apprentice was created as satire, like Dr. Strangelove or Duck Soup, or Spike Lee doing The Life and Times of Robert E. Lee: Hero or God?, or a Neil Simon Broadway adaptation of Mein Kampf, but huge swaths of America saw it as an inspirational documentary. Rufus T. Firefly seems much more realistic a leader than ours, and at this point, Freedonia seems a much more believable Nation.

It could not have been easy, fabricating a faux version of a consummate phony. A man who would later whine that all he had when he started was a “small million dollar loan” from his father. Besides being pathetic on its face, even this claim was untrue, as the young reptile came into many millions of daddy’s dollars – much of it illegally as far as the IRS was concerned.

Chrump is a symptom of America. A significant portion of the American electorate prides itself in being misinformed, obstinate, self-absorbed and racist. Chrump is all that and more. He looks out for Number One at all times, and takes what is rightfully everyone else’s at every turn. Ayn Rand would have approved bigly. Don’t miss her posthumous novel:

With nary a hint of irony, Chrump called James Comey (whose Clinton-killing October surprise made Chrump president) “a proven LEAKER & LIAR,” and then pardoned I. “Scooter” Libby (no relation), who was literally convicted of LEAKING & LYING.”

The big question now is, I suppose, how soon will Chrump pardon Scooter Libby…I mean Michael Cohen. Chrump already pardoned convicted traitor Libby (Dick Cheney’s chief-of-staff), who outed active covert CIA operative Valerie Plame, in order to cover up Cheney’s lies justifying his illegal invasion of Iraq. Even Now-Second-Worst-President-Ever George W. Bush would not pardon Scooter since he was found guilty. He just commuted his sentence before it even began. This is Chrump’s trial balloon to set the stage for future pardons of Chrump administration criminals, including Chrump himself.

In order to divert everyone’s attention from the news that his personal “attorney” being under criminal investigation, Stormy Daniels, the Russia investigation and the impending publication of James Comey’s book, Chrump attacked Syria with Weapons of Mass Distraction. Der Furor, of course, warned everyone that he was going to throw his military hissy fit days earlier. That was after tweeting that he was going to pull out of Syria two weeks ago. His little tantrum amounted to nothing more than the typical Chrump talking tough and waving his tiny hands. That did not stop him from, and I kid you not, declaring “Mission Accomplished.”

Totally not Photoshopped

 

Also, there was this...

Take a guess who did not even warn Congress



 

 

Is That an Orange Gas Cloud I Smell, or
Did the British Set Fire To Washington, DC Again?

Does something smell funny? Or is it just me? Every time I turn on the TV or radio, it smells like something is rotten in DC. Many people find this odor offensive, but there are quite a few (not nearly few enough) folks out there clamoring for a whiff. They would sell their souls – or what’s left of them – for a sample, let alone a bottle. I am not sure why; supplies seem unlimited. In any event, we thought you should know what all the fuss is about.

CHRUMP
The Fragrance

Want to smell like an asshole? Literally?

 

Spritz it on, splash it on, pour it on, gargle it, bathe in it. Who cares?

You’ll want to buy it by the gallon. That’s real class.

 

Once you get your CHRUMP on, you can do whatever you want – They let you get away with it. Grab ‘em anywhere, shoot ‘em on Fifth Avenue, bomb Syria, fire the Attorney General, the Deputy Attorney General and/or the Special Counsel. Why the hell not?

Act now and have your entire life savings disappear.

I. Mangrey regretting.