Holiday Greetings From Everyone at Paying Attention
One Less Dick Never Hurt Anyone
O frabjous day!
Callooh! Callay!
August 7, 2018
August 7, 2018
Hello loyal readers. It’s me, Ed Venture. As managing editor here at Paying Attention,
it is my job at this time of year to remind you of our admittedly overzealous obsession
with Richard Milhous Nixon, and to keep the Resignation Day(s) tradition alive.
As most of you are probably unaware,
today is Erev Resignation Day(s) (or Resignation Day(s) Eve, depending on how
you roll). On the evening of August 8,
1974, crook, felon, anti-Semite, anti-First Amendment, Liberal-hating,
secret-bomber, paranoiac, all-around uncommitted mental patient, increasingly
alcohol-infused and then-president Richard M. Nixon, announced that he would be
resigning as president after serving half of his second term in the People's
House in order to avoid a term in the Big House. He made it official the following day.
On August 8, 1974, what would later become
the staff at Paying Attention, and a few fellow travelers, attended a Bonnie
Raitt concert. At one point, Bonnie
stopped the show to announce that Richard Nixon had announced that he was going
to resign the presidency, and broke into Auld Lang Syne, before returning to
her regularly scheduled setlist.
Thousands of people were dancing in the streets. Some celebrated by smoking marijuana from a
bong fashioned to look like Dick Nixon.
This cannot be verified and was, of course, illegal. That is, unless the president did it.
A young I.
Mangrey in his Resignation Day(s) finery
Today we have a new mental patient pooping in
the presidential sandbox. You may have
heard about this already. I won’t go
into all that right now. The more things
change, the more they stay the strange. Anyway,
Resignation Day(s) is one of my favorite American holidays. A great day for democracy and as close as we
get to a great day for justice in this country. I snagged a photo of I. Mangrey (above) sporting
one of his prized t-shirts to commemorate this festive time of year. He and it are a bit wrinkled today, but the
message is timeless.
While impeaching Nixon seems to be off the table at this point, we have a tremendously – some would say the most – impeachable prezident right under our noses, wedged inside our ears, and poking our eyes like long steel needles. If it was good enough for Nixon, it is certainly good enough for this guy:
While impeaching Nixon seems to be off the table at this point, we have a tremendously – some would say the most – impeachable prezident right under our noses, wedged inside our ears, and poking our eyes like long steel needles. If it was good enough for Nixon, it is certainly good enough for this guy:
This
fucking guy
I have never been a quitter," began
Nixon during prime time on August 8, 1974, "To leave office before my term
is completed is opposed to every instinct in my body…Therefore, I shall resign
the Presidency effective at noon tomorrow. Vice President Ford will be sworn in
as President at that hour in this office." Gerald Ford, Nixon’s
hand-picked pardoner/successor took the oaf of office on August 9, 1974 capping
off America’s only two-day national holiday. I still remember it well, to the
best of my recollection.
And so I offer you this special phrase, to
kids from one to ninety-two; and though it's been said, many times, many ways -
Happy Resignation Day(s), Happy Resignation Day(s), Happy Resignation Dayyyy(s) to
you.
Wishing you and yours all the best during this
brief, fun-filled 44th anniversary of the
finally-not-having-Dick-Nixon-to-kick-around-anymore holiday season.
Ed Venture
In 2006 I stumbled across a bit of this very
old, well-know verse that I thought would be fun to share with everyone at this
special time of year. It’s an age-old seasonal ditty and this being the eve of
my favorite American holiday and all. I’m not sure I remembered all of the
words correctly but I’ve rendered them to the best of my recollection, though I
may have been overzealous and inadvertently added a few verses that didn’t
exist at all. But, it’s full of holiday magic and joy – a favorite of children
and adults throughout the ages, so read it to your children and grandchildren
to keep this great American tradition alive. Now without further ado, in honor
of August 8-9, 1974, a moment in history, which our Founders would surely have
savoured, I bring you…
Twas the night before Resignation
Twas the night before Resignation, when all through the
house
Richard Nixon was cornered, like a trapped diseased mouse.
His burglars had screwed it tho they burgled with care,
His cover-up in ruins, soon the end would be there.
The Congress were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of impeachment danced in their heads.
Sam Irvin with his gavel, exposed all the crap,
And roused our democracy from a long winter’s nap.
So all o’er the land there arose such a clatter,
Even the public could see what was the matter.
And there it was every day on TV like a flash,
Then everyone knew the president was trash.
It was hard to imagine this crook being regal
Tho he said, “If the president does it then it is not illegal.”
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But his lies all exposed and the end of his career.
A great day for democracy, it happened so quick,
What could be worse than that horrid old Dick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And all those were sentenced and each one by name!
"Now Haldeman! now, Erlichman! now, Mitchell and Dean!
On, Colson! On, Liddy!, oh my what a scene!
They all came a tumbling from the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
Richard Nixon was cornered, like a trapped diseased mouse.
His burglars had screwed it tho they burgled with care,
His cover-up in ruins, soon the end would be there.
The Congress were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of impeachment danced in their heads.
Sam Irvin with his gavel, exposed all the crap,
And roused our democracy from a long winter’s nap.
So all o’er the land there arose such a clatter,
Even the public could see what was the matter.
And there it was every day on TV like a flash,
Then everyone knew the president was trash.
It was hard to imagine this crook being regal
Tho he said, “If the president does it then it is not illegal.”
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But his lies all exposed and the end of his career.
A great day for democracy, it happened so quick,
What could be worse than that horrid old Dick.
More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And all those were sentenced and each one by name!
"Now Haldeman! now, Erlichman! now, Mitchell and Dean!
On, Colson! On, Liddy!, oh my what a scene!
They all came a tumbling from the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!"
‘Tis the eve of impeachment –Oh please just once more
So much fun to be had, who knows what’s in store,
This appointed dry-drunk liar with his head up his butt.
Must be ripped from the Peoples’ House and his prison door shut.
Yes we did it one time not so long ago
Said it couldn’t be done, well how could we know.
Who knows what can happen when clear thinking rules,
Maybe we can get rid of this new batch of fools.
A long train of abuses and usurpations once again stains us all,
By Constitution, our right and our duty - this Despot must fall.
Again let’s take back our nation from thieves,
Then lock them away and dispose of the keys.
It’s that time of the season, to excise George the king,
The land of the free and that sort of thing.
And I say to you all, Power To The People, Out Of Sight,
More Impeachment to all, and to all a good-night!
So much fun to be had, who knows what’s in store,
This appointed dry-drunk liar with his head up his butt.
Must be ripped from the Peoples’ House and his prison door shut.
Yes we did it one time not so long ago
Said it couldn’t be done, well how could we know.
Who knows what can happen when clear thinking rules,
Maybe we can get rid of this new batch of fools.
A long train of abuses and usurpations once again stains us all,
By Constitution, our right and our duty - this Despot must fall.
Again let’s take back our nation from thieves,
Then lock them away and dispose of the keys.
It’s that time of the season, to excise George the king,
The land of the free and that sort of thing.
And I say to you all, Power To The People, Out Of Sight,
More Impeachment to all, and to all a good-night!
Enjoy Resignation Day(s)
2018. Drink up – you know old Tricky Dick would. Panic responsibly.
“The Dick is out but we’re still getting fucked.” sg, August 9, 1974
All the best from everyone here at Paying Attention.
No comments:
Post a Comment