Mueller Madness

The Marine and The Maroon

July 25, 2019

Special Counsel Robert Mueller begrudgingly obeyed the subpoenas that brought him in front of two congressional committees, television cameras and the national spotlight.  His answers were generally brief, mostly mono-syllabic.  A large percentage of his ‘longer answers’ were simply Mueller explaining that he would not answer the question.  There were a few more substantive and interesting moments, despite the fact that Mueller’s ex-boss – serial liar and presidential-protector Bill Barr, who once said he had no problem with Mueller testifying, presumably because Barr told the world that Mueller had totally exonerated his client – who, on the eve of his impending testimony essentially instructed Mueller to keep his mouth shut.  

Whatever else Bill Barr might be, he is unlikely so dim that he believes what Chrump’s blind, deaf and stunningly dumb devotees – and perhaps even Chrump himself – believe, that Chrump was totally exonerated with a side of NO COLLUSION.

He described Chrump as “giving some boost to what is and should be illegal activity” perpetrated by Wikileaks.  Mueller used the phrase “problematic is an understatement” in describing Chrump repeated encouragement of the help he was getting from Wikileaks.  Some might call such boosting of illegal activity aiding and abetting, or perhaps even criminal conspiracy, or dare I say – COLLUSION. 

Mueller also testified that Chrump misled the probe by being frequently dishonest in his written answers to questions posed by the Special Prosecutor.  He described Chrump’s answers as “incomplete,” “imprecise,” “inadequate” and “insufficient.  Mueller characterized Chrump’s responses to the Special Counsel’s inquiries as “generally untruthful.”

The Special Counsel agreed to the characterization of Chrump as “unpatriotic” – not the best adjective for a president.  Chrump’s idea of patriotic of course is an unruly crowd kissing his ass and chanting “Send her back!” in reference to an African American citizen who Chrump had previously advised to “go back where she came from.”  It is possible that Donald Chrump is mistaken, or more likely psychotic to a historic degree.  He might be, as he likes to say, the most psychotic person in history.  Chrump is unquestionably the most psychotic man ever to hold the office he now holds in his tiny, little hands several days a week, often for several hours a day.

Mueller also surprised one of his Republican’t inquisitors by clearly stating that a president could be indicted and prosecuted for obstruction of justice once he is out of office.  This after once again making it clear that his investigation absolutely did not exonerate Chrump.

Unfortunately, there is still an alternative reality, based on and disseminating alternative facts.  Kellyanne Conjob told us about “alternative facts” quite some time ago.  They are the white bread and I-can’t-believe-it’s-not-butter of this faux administration.

“This was a very big day for our country. This was a very big day for the
Republican Party. And you could say it was a great day for me,
but I don't even like to say that.” (actual quote)

 

As one would expect, the Chrump described this very bad, incredibly horrible day as a complete victory.  Maybe the biggest victory in all of human history.  NO EXONERATION.  TOTAL COLLUSION.  Or something like that.

I. Mangrey recovering.