BROKEN NEWS

 

History in The Faking

November 15, 2019

As reported yesterday, Donald Chrump may not be watching his presidency, his reputation and hopefully his very future taken behind the woodshed and beaten like a rug after a dust storm, but many Americans are watching the current Greatest Show on Earth closely.  Impeachment Season 2019 makes the staff at Paying Attention nostalgic for impeachments past.  Personally, I still remember coming home from school every day and turning on the tiny black-and-white TV set in my kitchen to watch the inimitable Sen. Sam Irvin lead the ultimately historic Watergate Hearings.

Select Committee on Presidential Campaign Activities, Senate Watergate Committee

Regular visitors to this site are all too well aware of our unabashed obsession with the Watergate Scandal and the subsequent impeachment and departure-in-disgrace of its deranged perpetrator Richard Nixon.  Nixon hired a group of ex-CIA and Cubans led by G. Gordon Liddy, dubbed “The Plumbers” to break into the Democratic National Committee headquarters in the Watergate Hotel in an effort to sabotage the presidential campaign of Nixon’s opponent – George McGovern.

That Was Then, This Is Wow

Intently angling for his own departure-in-disgrace, Donald Chrump hired “The Dumbers” in a desperate and stupid attempt to sabotage Chrump’s presumed opponent for the 2020 presidential race.  The Dumbers are led, of course, by dementia-adjacent Rudy Giuliani, whose idiot minions include Rick “Oops” Perry and Gordon “I Paid $1M For Chrump’s Inauguation and All I Got Was This Lousy Ambassadorship and A Possible Indictment For Perjury” Sondland.  Giuliani is the genius who, above all else, should always be remembered for insisting, against all good counsel, that the security command center for the top leadership of the City of New York be located in Seven World Trade Center – Ground Zero on 9/11.  Rudy did not hire Cubans; he probably thought they were in ISIS.  Instead, America’s mayor/moron went right to the Motherland, and brought in some top-notch Russian operatives to help with his treasonesque mission.  Two of them – Lev and Igor – are now in prison, awaiting trial and/or turning state’s evidence.

In the Watergate saga, Deep Throat divulged critical information to Woodward and Bernstein in the shadows of a Washington, DC parking garage.  In Blabbergate, Dumb Throat, Donald Chrump personally provided a doctored transcript of his “perfect phone call” with Ukraine President Zelensky to the news media he so despises.  Despite taking the time and effort to manipulate the transcript before releasing it, the document clearly showed Chrump committing bribery and/or extortion, or as it was called in Ancient Rome ‘quid pro quo.’  Oh, and then his chief-of-staff – Mick Mulvaney, who Chrump will soon deny he ever knew – admitted it and told us all to “get over it” because “we do it all the time.”

This beautiful and very perfect impeachment figures to be an interesting process, and it is always fun to watch Republican’ts punching themselves in the face on every single network for hours on end.  But I still have not figured out what type of wine goes with impeach.  Red for Republican’t or white for the color of their nationalism?  Or perhaps a nice Russian vodka.

I. Mangrey reporting.  Do I dare to eat impeach?