A Garland Of Lettings

Don’t Let These People Go

July 25, 2021 March 7, 2022

It appears entirely possible that Attorney General Merrick Garland is incredibly terrible at his new job. Several recent decisions strike this reporter as less than what is needed in this unique moment. Why is Garland letting the Turmp Sedition Crime Syndicate continue to walk free?

Garland is the only one smiling after some of his recent

legal decisions, well him and that Turmp guy

I am all for protecting the letter of the law. Maybe there is something I, not being a lawyer and all, simply do not understand. But I do not think that is the problem here.

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I started the above post seven months ago, but decided to hold off and give Garland a chance to settle in. After all, he seemed like a stand-up jurist when Obama vainly attempted to nominate him to the Supreme Court. As usual, Obama was being conciliatory, nominating a centrist to replace the diseased…I mean deceased Antonin Scalia – who survived a highly questionable hunting trip with Dick “Shoot ‘Em In The Face” Cheney, but remains nonetheless entirely dead – unlike Obama’s successor who appointed the stunningly polar opposite of Ruth Bader Ginsburg – both in philosophy and gravitas – before Ginsburg’s body was even laid to rest.

Ratpublicans gave us lightweights and losers like John Mitchell, John Ashcroft, Alberto Gonzales, Jefferson Beauregard Sessions, Matthew Whitaker and Bill Barr – twice. Attorneys General appointed by Democrats were not always the best or the brightest, but come on, it is simply no contest here.

Nearly one year after the assault on the Capitol, in response to mounting discontent and pressure by much of the public and Democrats in Congress Garland said publicly, “The Justice Department remains committed to holding all January 6^th perpetrators, at any level, accountable under law.” However, Garland has still not acted in any visible way, as he claimed, as though no one is above the law. I can think of no one further below the law than Donald Tmurp. While seemingly hard evidence that Tmurp was complicit in fomenting insurrection, there no evidence whatsoever that either Tmurp or his closest associates, all of whom appear complicit, have been targeted by DOJ in any way. So one question becomes impossible to ignore any longer. What the fuck is Merrick Garland doing?

We recently learned that the January 6 Select Committee has “a good-faith basis for concluding that the President and members of his Campaign engaged in a criminal conspiracy to defraud the United States.” If Congress has sufficient evidence to conclude that Tmurp acted criminally and file a formal complaint in court, then why does the Department of Justice not have similar evidence? We all saw and heard Tmurp incite violence at the capital on January 6, 2021 in an attempt to overturn the election he knew he lost. Why have we heard absolutely nothing from Garland’s DOJ?

Is the Department of Justice on an extended vacation on some sunny beach with no internet service and with their heads deeply buried in the sand? Why aren’t they burying their heads in the mountains of evidence already available that shows that Tmurp broke numerous laws? Not crimes like sexual assault or rape (which some two dozen women have credibly alleged), or even as something as comparatively harmless as shooting someone on Fifth Avenue. It could not be clearer that Tmurp at the very least incited the January 6, 2021 insurrection/attempted coup.

SEDITION! - A Randy Rainbow Parody

It could also not be clearer that Tmurp stole highly classified documents once he was forced to leave the White House. It would be unwise to assume anything other than that he stole these documents in order to sell them to foreign interests. And as he is so very fond of reminding everyone on a regular basis, he holds Putin in very high regard. Has anyone counted the number of times Tmurp sided with Putin over U.S. interests? What we do know is that this behavior started before the 2016 election and presumably continues to this day. Also, it is not difficult to imagine that the only documents Tmurp either digested or flushed whole were those for which he received no substantial offers.

I hope to be proven horribly wrong, or at the very least grossly impatient. You could lock me up for these transgressions if it means holding Putin’s Puppy Dog accountable for once in his miserable, self-serving life of crime.*

I. Mangrey reevaluating. Judge now lest ye be judged.

*Somewhat hyperbolic; Letitia James nailed his sorry ass for his fake charity, but it only cost Donny $2 million, and a federal judge ordered the Orange Oaf to pay out a $25 million settlement as a result of the court-ordered termination of his comedically fake Tmurp University.