Bar Bill Barr

What Do You Do When The Comedian Is The Only Serious One?

March 14, 2022

Editor's note: This story discusses persons that some people may find offensive.

Twice-Former Attorney General Bill Barr is now in a public spat with the man whose shriveled balls he coddled, the man he aided and abetted and defended against justice, democracy and the American people.  

Barr is out flogging his self-serving book, insisting that he was simply a righteous man doing God’s work. Ignoring of course the fact that he was doing that work in service to one of the most godless men of all time, and doing it in a way the flew in the face of the oath he took to protect and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies foreign and domestic, not to protect one sick, twisted, narcissistic conman. But why quibble over such massive transgressions?

Bill Barr replicating an almost human form in happier times

During the course of one of the many interviews no one should be granting him, Barr belched that even though he would hope his ex-owner would not become his party’s presidential nominee in 2024 he would vote for a man who tried to steal America, “because I believe that the greatest threat to the country is the progressive agenda being pushed by the Democratic Party, it’s inconceivable to me that I wouldn’t vote for the Republican nominee.”

Really!? Progressive thinking and policies are the greatest threat?* Are you out of your flaccid fucking mind? Not the guy who called neo-Nazis and white supremacists “very fine people?” Not the guy who refused to accept the legitimate results of the election he lost even though you allegedly told him he definitely lost? Not the guy who stood up for Vladimir Putin at every turn? Not the guy who still praises Putin as “a genius” while the Russian madman oversees the wanton murder of Ukrainian civilians and bombs the fuck out of nuclear reactors, churches, hospitals, residences, schools, Holocaust memorials and individual women and children fleeing their beloved homeland? That guy isn’t the greatest threat to the country?

Zelenskyy has had to deal with two insane despots
Somehow Zelenskyy survived a "perfect phone call" from The Idiot 

Hey Bill, remember the part in your book where you said Tmurp exhibited a “detachment from reality that was stunning” to you? Remember when you lied about what the Mueller report said about him? How about when your idiot fucking boss withheld military assistance from Ukraine because Volodymyr Zelenskyy was unwilling to fabricate dirt on Hunter Biden in the run-up to the 2020 election? Zelenskyy ends up getting sandwiched between two of the most powerful, most sociopathic assholes on the planet. Thanks to you, your boy and his benefactor.

A comedian on the world stage:
Clown to the left of him, joker to the right
(okay, so it’s the other way around, so sue me)

Stealers Wheel – Stuck In The Middle With You

In a CNN interview with Jake Tapper (Why Jake? Why?) Barr mooed that “the progressive left is sort of showing sort of a totalitarian temperament.” He blames progressives, not his own lies and depredations and his party giving the store to Russia’s Choice Tmurp and white nationalists for dividing the nation. It might seem like Barr is just dodging responsibility, but he is just lying through his teeth. Dodging responsibility is just collateral damage.

On Fux News, Barr told Brett Baier that Tmurp “showed a detachment from reality that was stunning” to him as the Traitor-in-chief insisted that he would overturn Biden’s election and retain his Russian-backed presidency.

So Bernie Sanders, Alexandria Ocasio Cortez and Joe Biden who are trying to help those less fortunate to have a decent life, seriously address the climate crisis, bring America into the 21^st century, and fairly tax the super-rich, are more dangerous than a traitorous, anti-democratic, conman? Just because you were instrumental in helping him become all that he is? That’s the hill you want to die on? Please let me know how I can be of assistance.

I. Mangrey remembering. I don’t think I’ll be buying his book.

*Need you be reminded that Ratpublicans are literally running on elect-us-you-idiotic-gullible-fucks-and-then-we’ll-let-you-know-what-we-plan-to-do?