Broken News

Another Fake Hoax

September 16, 2022

The unrelenting world-wide climate crisis hoax has exposed another major hoax. Dinosaur tracks. Apparently, some dastardly prankster had put fake dinosaur tracks at the bottom of a Texas river. Lying scientists are telling us that the giant make-believe footprints were left by a dinosaur 113,000,000 years ago. Yeah sure, and Donald Trump stole hundreds of classified documents when he left the White House after Joe Biden “defeated him” in the fake, stolen 2020 election. Who do these people think they’re kidding?

Alleged dinosaur tracks found after Texas “river” "dries up"

Fake drought conditions, like those we are being told are happening all over the world, caused the Paluxy River in a place amusingly called Dinosaur Valley State Park in Texas to dry up, exposing the hoax tracks last visible in the year 2000. Of course you can see the bottom of the river – everyone knows that water is invisible. Next they’ll be telling us we don’t need fermented dinosaur juice to run cars because they can run on electricity…whatever that is.

Man caught making “dinosaur tracks” in “dried up” Paluxy River in Texas

Louis Jacobs, a fake vertebrate paleontologist at Southern Methodist University told a New York Times reporter, “Those footprints, they’re spectacular because they’re deep. You can see the toenails. There’s more than one kind, and there’s a lot of them.” I’ll believe it when I see a real dinosaur or when I hear Sean Hannity report it.

For now, I'm sticking with super-genius Herschel Walker who said, “At one time, science said man came from apes. Did it not? If that is true, why are there still apes? Think about it.” As many times as Walker was hit in the head playing pro football, and his multiple personality disorder, and the fact that there are heads of lettuce with more cortical activity, who would better know how science works?

You know what else is a hoax? Intelligent Ratpublicans.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled conspiracy theories.

Science Postscript:

Matt Wuerker

Marty Two Bulls