Broken News - GQP Primary Debase

A Devastating Eight-Clown Pile-Up

August 28, 2023

During their recent Fascist (nee Republican) Party debate, almost all candidates running against soon-to-be-convicted-felon Donald Junta Trump said they would still vote for him even after being found guilty of any or all of the 91 separate charges, across four different jurisdictions, against him.

The moderator asked the group to raise their hands if they would still support Trump if convicted. Here’s what happened next:

Raise your hand if you want a convicted insurrectionist to be our next president

Current second place fascist Ron DuhSantis looked to see what everyone else on the stage was doing, then tepidly raised his hand. No one had their hand held higher than fake candidate Vivek Ramasmarmy, who appears to be part laughing hyena. Chris Christie has been mercilessly bashing the Orange Ogre throughout the early stages of the primary, but Christie’s brain forgot to tell his hand not to leap into the air at that moment. Best of all was uber loser Mike Pence, who Trump’s supporters wanted to hang on January 6, 2021 as Pence ran and hid for his life during his boss’s attempted coup/murder plot. There’s stupid, and then there’s stupid. And pathetic. And cultist.

Surging suck-up Ramasmarmy managed to pull his head out of Trump’s butt (fortunately, Trump wasn’t there** or this could have been more than merely figurative) long enough to dicksplain the burgeoning climate crisis to the feeble-minded Fux audience and anyone else foolish or unfortunate enough to watch this eight-clown pile-up:

“I'm the only candidate on stage who isn't bought and paid for,* so I can say this. Climate change is a hoax. The reality is more people are dying of bad climate change policies than they are of actual climate change.”

Ramasmarmy had previously referred to a statement by progressive Rep. Ayanna Pressley (D-MA) by saying “These are the words of the modern grand wizards of the modern KKK.” First of all, even the modern KKK is not accepting Black women into its ranks, let alone as grand wizard. Pressley is black, Ramasmarmy, who also called Juneteenth a “useless” holiday, is reptilian. 

Ramasmarmy’s most recent moment in the scum had him on Meat The Press blaming “a new wave of anti-Black and anti-Hispanic racism as a consequence of the so-called anti-racist movement.” I’ll let his bile speak for itself on this one.

The rest of the evening, so I hear, was filled with the blinkered Philistine pig-ignorance we’ve come to expect from these non-creative garbage. Oh, and heapin’ helpin’ of the usual lying, fascist bullshit.

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*Just what this country needs, another narcissistic, autocratic-minded mega-millionaire who thinks he knows everything.
**Trump thought his time would be better spent in mutual-masturbation with Fucker Carlson on the failing social media platform formerly known as Twitter.

I. Mangrey recovering.