July 20, 2017
Now He Is Physically
Ill
After all he has been through, and all he has put us
through, John McCain now has brain cancer. Can that retroactively explain
inflicting Sarah Palin on us? Donald Chrump, who recently complimented (?)
McCain, calling him ‘‘a crusty voice in Washington. Plus, we need his vote,’’ may
also have said, “Actually, I like people who don’t have cancer.”
Putin Grabs Some Pussy
It turns out that 2½ hours of quality time with his beloved
Vladimir, was not enough. Who knows when they might see each other again? Desperate
for just one more glance, one more touch, perhaps a last sweet, sweet kiss, Chrump
wandered away from his seat during a G-20 dinner with all the principals and
their spouses and plopped his considerable butt beside Putin. Chrump had this previously
undisclosed tête-à-tête sans support staff of any kind. Chrump sat and talked
with Putin and Putin’s translator (Chrump’s translator does not speak Russian.)
for an hour. Don said it was a very short meeting, proving only that time is
one more thing about which he has no clue. Those who witnessed this meeting of
the swines were taken aback, not only be the mere occurrence of such a meeting,
but by the animated nature of the conversation, frequented by laughter. Many
people are saying that tongues were involved. A bromance for the ages. What
could possibly go wrong? Rest assured that Chrump will have no recollection of
any such meeting.
One witness of the impromptu tryst said, “It was very
disconcerting to see Mr. Chrump blowing kisses across the dining hall to Mr.
Putin, who was beckoning Mr. Chrump to join him by patting the empty chair next
to him with a kind of come hither look. As Mr. Chrump waddled over to sit next
to Putin, we hoped he was only going to the bathroom. No one else really wanted
anything to do with either of them, but they couldn’t seem to get enough of
each other. Most disturbing of all was when Mr. Chrump suddenly disappeared beneath
the table. He was down there a good long while and I don’t think he was picking
up his napkin, if you know what I mean. The smile on Mr. Putin’s face was quite
disturbing to all of us. Mr. Chrump had to be hoisted back to his feet by
several men.”
The Power of Positive
Tanking
After seven years and scores of attempts to repeal and pretend
to replace Obamacare, Republican’ts finally had their big chance. They own the
Senate and the House, and finally have a “president” who will sign anything
that hurts Obama’s legacy. Not that Chrump is a petty, petulant, pusillanimous,
prevaricator or anything. The party of Putin-in-America has now had three stabs
at passing their tax-cuts-for-the-rich-in-healthcare-bill’s-clothing to no
avail.
Chrump blames everyone but himself for the Republican’t Senate
failing to pass their killer healthcare reform. The House passed theirs, which
Chrump loved and then hated. No one knows for sure where he stands at the
moment. Not that it really matters since he is always standing on quicksand. Chrump
blames Democrats for failing to support Chrump and the lunatic Republican’t’s
efforts to kill the healthcare system Democrats worked on for decades. The fact
that Dems caved at just about every turn to satisfy Republican’ts and insurance
and pharmaceutical companies to get tens-of-millions more Americans health
insurance just was not good enough. Obamacare simply did not meet the
Republican’t criteria; it did not screw enough people to satisfy them. So now
that they run everything they are trying their damndest to kill poor people and
for some reason only about 10 percent of the public - or as Chrump puts it,
almost half the country - thinks that is a good idea. Just because Chrump and
the Republican’ts like to punch themselves in the nuts on a daily basis does
not mean the Democrats have to do the same (they generally do a pretty good job
of that, but thankfully were unwilling to do so with Obamacare).
The Congressional Budget Office says the latest repeal-only
bill will cause 32 million people to lose health insurance - much better than
the measly 22 million with that repeal-an-replace nonsense. Next week Mitch
McConnell will introduce the Battering Insurance Today Eventually Means Excellence
(BITE ME) bill, commonly referred to as Repeal-and-Go-Fuck-Yourself. Once again
Der Furor is promising the moon. “As
I have always said, let Obamacare fail and then come together and do a great
healthcare plan. Stay tuned!” Or is he just promising to moon us? All
pretty much the same with old Chrumpo.
Sorry Harpo, I had to do it. He
stole your face.
Now, if we could just get him to stop talking.
Now, if we could just get him to stop talking.
I. Mangrey reporting. When can we finally let lying Chrumps
sleep?
No comments:
Post a Comment