Perry Coma

It’s Not What It Looks Like…It Is So Much Worse

June 30, 2017

Energy (Gulp!) Secretary, and idiot savant sans any hint of savant, Rick Perry, who neither knew nor cared what might be the purpose of the Department of Energy, which he wanted to get rid of, has done gone and opened up his Texass-sized pie hole again. Perry continues his battle to demonstrate beyond a reasonable doubt just what a world-class ignoramus and corporate whore he is. I know there is stiff competition over yonder in that there White House these days, what with Ben Carson – who only used his brain while in the operating room, amnesiacs like Jeff Sessions and Jared Kushner, who never met a Russian they could remember, and the head of the Environmental Protection Agency – Scott Pruitt, who took the mental out of environmental – who thinks his job is to protect corporations from the environment. Pruitt is a rabid climate science denier who spent years suing the agency he now “leads”. And they are just the tip of the crazy berg. Of course, their boss is less stable, less tethered to reality and more sociopathic than all of them combined. That will not stop them from reaching for all the marbles that they have obviously lost. This tumor-infested fish clearly rots from its orange-tinted head down. But, Rick Perry is, and always has been, a special kind of looney bird. Perry managed to break the record-breaking record for governors overseeing executions. Think Charles Manson meets Mr. Rogers.

Last week, Mr. Oops, who could not remember all three government agencies he wanted to kill off, chimed in on climate change last week. Perry was asked if he believed that carbon dioxide was the “primary control knob” for rising temperatures, more violent storms and the rapidly accelerating brain-death of the government of the United States. Instead, Perry said, "No, most likely the primary control knob is the ocean waters and this environment that we live in." I can feel my IQ diminishing just from reading this actual (I swear) quote. I am not sure how much more of this I can take.

A Hint of How Much More of This I Might Have to Take

But wait, there’s more. Though Perry’s mouth is fine with saying, “The climate is changing, man is having an impact on it. I’ve said that time after time,” he is still clearly suffering from the excessive heat that has the blood going to whatever resides above his neck moving slower than molasses on Mars, causing him to add, “Let’s come out of the shadows of hiding behind your political statements and let’s talk about it. What’s wrong with that? And I’m full well, I can be convinced, but why not let’s talk about it.” Yes, why not let’s talk about having a conversation about talking about it for a few more years, because clearly 97 percent of climate scientists cannot know as much as the voices in Rick’s skull. But, by all means let us talk about it. I’m all ears. And he’s all mouth. I only wish I had a foot and he had an ass.

Remember, Cowboy Rick is kind of in charge of the Nukes

 

I. Mangrey reporting. Remember, if you don’t get pissed off, you will get pissed on.