What a Faking Mother Faker

Donald Chrump Drains His Own Swamp

The Thick of It
July 26, 2017

America’s fake president just will not quit. For some reason he hates everyone around him. With the possible exception of Mike Flynn, who had to quit for being too cozy with the Russians. Actually, that is not exactly why he quit. Flynn had to exit in disgrace because he lied about his coziness with the Russians and because everyone except Donald Chrump wanted him out. Chrump dumped so many campaign managers – all of whom he continued to call on for advice. In fact, he is still pining for Mike Flynn. What idiot hired all these people in the first place?

Der Furor loved James Comey last October when Comey was putting the final nail in the Clinton campaign’s coffin. Chrump fired him in May.

Chrump brought in the human incarnation of Anthony Weiner’s dick pic, Anthony Scaramucci, which made Sean Spicer so sad that Sean gave up and left. Chrump desperately wants tiny bigot Jeff Sessions to resign because he is afraid to fire him. Many people are saying that Hair Chrump is asking advisors if he can fire the Senate and the House. Chrump told Paying Attention reporter Ho Li Schitte, “There is nothing that I have seen in the Constitution that says the Senate and House can’t be fired for not doing the job the president wants them to do. I won the election bigly and I have read all 500 pages many times. I know it by heart, so I can tell you that not the president, but the presidency…the presidency can fire the Senate and I think the House also. That I can tell you. And I know a few things, believe me. I know more about the Constitution than anyone alive today. Everybody knows this. Just ask anyone.”

While speaking to thousands of young people at the annual Boy Scouts Jamboree, Chrump said of Health and Human Services secretary Tom Price, “Hopefully he’s going to get the votes tomorrow to start on the path to kill this thing called ObamaCare that’s really hurting us. He better get them, otherwise I’ll say, ‘Tom, you’re fired.’” The fake media says that Chrump was joking when he said that to the Scouts…at a non-political event…for Boy Scouts…after bragging about winning the election…again (or is it still?). First of all, it is Chrump’s job to get the votes, and second of all, fuck him. Chrump has not done a day’s work since oozing into office. To be fair, Chrump has never done an actual day’s work in his whole life, so I guess you get what you pay for.

Look it up

It appears that those Chrump has not publicly hated on thus far probably hate him (with the singular exception of Putin and company). Sources say that Wrecks Tillerson continues to regret joining the Chrump “team”. In his latest disappointment with his idiot boss, Tillerson called Chrump’s behavior towards Jeff Sessions “unprofessional”. One cannot help but wonder what the fuck Tillerson thought of Chrump’s behavior before that – like when he entered the race by calling all Mexicans rapists, or said a judge was unfit to rule on a case involving Chrump because the judge was Mexican (he was not), or when Chrump talked about grabbing women by the pussy, or verbally ogled Emmanuel Macron’s wife, or ever for that matter. And just how professional did Tillerson think he himself was behaving while he was violating his nation’s sanctions against Russia? I say fuck ‘em all.

Chrump also refuses to quit going after Hillary Clinton. He continues to demand that everyone investigate her instead of him. Does he still want to lock her up?

A sample of Chrump’s latest Twitter farting deluge

Hello, I must be going.

I. Mangrey reporting.