Wall Or Nothing

Mr. Chrump, Give Up That Wall

December 21, 2018

During his recent meeting with Pelosi and Schumer, un-prezident Donald J. Tantrum stamped his little feet and wrung his tiny hands, threatening to shut down the government unless he gets his precious, imaginary, inarguably absurd Mexican border wall.  At the tenth hour, he caved – as usual – and was ready to walk away from his demand so he could get out of that “dump” the White House and get back to his beloved Mor-on Lago.  

At the eleventh hour, after pressure from some of the best minds the Far-fetched Right has to offer – Rush Limbaugh, Ann Coulter, and one assumes Sean Hannity – America’s Child-in-chief caved on his previous caving, and renewed his bluster on shutting down the government because…well, just because.  The man with the cotton candy hair threatened that he would proudly shut down the government if he did not get his way – his way being $5B for his big, beautiful wall – and it now seems that on Christmas Eve, the government will be in shut-down mode.  It remains abundantly clear that Mexico will (force American tax payers, and/or the right wing’s current GoFundMe campaign to) pay for the wall.

Circus-clown-in-chief overseeing his new border security team

 

In Other News of The Criminally Insane…

Chrump also went rogue on Syria.  He unilaterally announced that he was pulling all American troops out of Syria.  This decree was a surprise to everyone.  The military, the Joint Chiefs of Staff, leaders in Congress, and very likely Chrump himself.  This is Der Furor’s MISSION ACCOMPLISHED moment, claiming that ISIS is completely defeated – much like his “almost complete victory” in the 2018 midterm elections, which he lost by historic proportions.

Unfortunately, Chrump is only the latest Republican’t president to throw our long-time allies – the Kurds – under the Humvee.  Surely, it is time for the Grand Old Outdated Party (GOOP) to take its place alongside the Whig and the Bull Moose parties.

Perhaps the MISSION ACCOMPLISHED comparison is a bit off the mark.  It might be nothing more than a smokscreen for his true intent – completing as much of his benefactor’s wish list as possible before being brutally banished from American society.  This sudden withdrawal of troops is just what the Kremlin ordered.  Putin wants us out of there yesterday, but one imagines tomorrow works quite well.  This action immediately resulted in the sudden, surprising departure of Secretary of Defense James Mattis.  Mattis harshly criticized Der Furor while resigning in protest over Chrump's treacherous disregard for America's allies and alliances, his dangerous idiocy, and Chrump's slavish devotion to Vladimir Putin.

I am reminded of the old schoolyard taunt, “If he had a brain, he’d be dangerous.”  While nothing could be more appropriate in dealing with Chrump, the once reliable barb rings hollow, since Chrump has no brain and one would be hard pressed to imagine him being any more dangerous than he already is at this moment.

I. Mangrey reporting.