Mueller, Mueller Everywhere And Not a Drop To Drink

Dial M For Mueller

April 18, 2019

“Oh my god.  This is terrible.  This is the end of my presidency.  I’m fucked.”
Donald J. Trump, an obviously innocent man, to Jeff Sessions
on learning of the appointment of Robert Mueller

There is an old saying in the world of jurisprudence often attributed to Abraham Lincoln – “He who represents himself has a fool for a client.”  I have allowed myself to update this old saw: He who represents Donald Chrump has a fool for a client and is himself a pathetic schmuck.

Fool or idiot? You make the call.

Under our system of justice – such as it is – everyone (your mileage may vary) is innocent until proven guilty and is entitled to legal representation.  Though it can be tempting, it is wrong to denigrate an attorney for defending even the most heinous perpetrator – Donald Chrump for example.  This is a tough job, but someone has to do it.  Besides, there are plenty of other reasons to heap scorn on lawyers. 

In 1770, a young lawyer by the name of John Adams defended eight British soldiers accused of murder during a riot in Boston on March 5, 1770.  That riot became known to some as the Boston Massacre, and that young lawyer became America’s second president.

I have no illusion that Donald Chrump knows better than to defend himself in a court of law.  He has certainly been trying non-stop to defend himself in the court of public opinion.  If Chrump had not blatantly and repeatedly shown himself to be guilty, he too would be considered innocent as of this moment.  According to the Mueller Report, the only reason Chrump is not already in jail is because a number of people around him refused to carry out his clearly illegal orders on numerous occasions.  Der Furor is fortunate to have his newest personal attorney posing as Attorney General of the United States.  Barr is clearly and exclusively protecting his boss, and as he has done in similar situations in the past, completely omitted any mention of damaging information that permeates the Mueller Report.

This Is Not Going Well For The Orange Poopstain

Chris Wallace of Fux News had this to say after Barr’s fake news conference, which was designed to mislead the public about when lay hidden within the Mueller report, “The Attorney General seemed almost to be acting as the counselor for the defense, the counselor for the president, rather than the attorney general, talking about his motives, his emotions.  Really, as I say, making a case for the president.”  This is an actual quote from one of the top newsmen on Chrump’s personal propaganda machine.

During his pre-emptive press event, Barr moaned that Poor Donald was not obstructing justice by firing Comey “because of the Russia thing” and instructing his lawyer to fire Mueller and threatening witnesses against him and attacking the investigation over and over and over on Twitter and elsewhere, he was just frustrated.  He was frustrated?  WTF.  We have been watching the TOTAL COLLUSION EXPRESS live, on national television and Twitter every f*%king day for over two years, riding roughshod over this country while the Colluder-in-chief whined and lied every minute about how innocent he was.  To paraphrase Marjorie Stoneman Douglas shooting survivor Emma Gonzales, we call bullshit!

It is interesting that the man who has said he has “one of the great memories of all time” (which he subsequently insisted he did not remember saying), provided 37 instances of “I do not recall”/“I do not remember”/"I have no independent recollection," etc., in his brief, one assumes lie-ridden written responses to Mueller’s questions.  I’m kidding, it is not interesting, it is pure unadulterated bullshit, as we have come to expect from one of the great sociopaths of all time.

Mueller has provided ample evidence – more of which is certain to come – to begin impeachment proceedings against a criminally ill-suited president with consistent malicious intent to obstruct justice. 

I. Mangrey recalculating.