Nobody Home

Out of The Mouths of Boobs (Oft Times Come Covfefe)

September 14, 2019

Yesterday, one of the most toxic, environmentally hazardous substances known to man – from its poisonous artificial coloring, to its semi-synthetic petroleum-based head covering, to its ability to decree death and destruction to our planet – addressed his fellow Republican’ts in Baltimore, the city Chrump recently slimed as “a disgusting rat and rodent infested mess” and “a very dangerous and filthy place” where “no human being would want to live.”  Interestingly, the very presence of Donald Chrump has made the whole United States a place in which “no human being would want to live.”

Before we continue, I feel it is my responsibility to warn you that the following is an actual quote straight from the face sphincter of the very dangerous and filthy Donald Chrump, a person no human being would want to listen to, but sometimes must.  This might be one of those times.  Thanks to the Second Amendment or something, you can stop right now before it is too late.  You have been warned.

Chrump was in part celebrating the reversal of clean water regulations because Obama enacted them and because Chrump is an inhuman pile of excrement (my apologies the excrement).  Here is what he excreted, “Earlier today, my administration formally repealed the horrible, dangerous, anti-everything waters of the United States rule.  We have the cleanest water, the cleanest air that we’ve ever had in the history of our country, right now.  And, just for the press, because they’ll get me on that one, I’m thinking.  Let’s say the history of our country over the last 25 years. You know, I would say that the first few years they probably had cleaner water, cleaner air because there was nobody here.  So I have to be very accurate.” 

Oh, so very accurate he is.  There was nobody here 25 years ago?  Really?  Not even Ivanka?  Does Chrump know how old he is?  Did he simply misread his teleprompter or his very, very large uh-brain? 

Let us assume, for the sake of our own sanity, that our Very-Stable-Genius-in-chief meant 250 years ago – nobody here, you racist piece of shit?  Someone should take this poor excuse for a life form out in back of the barn put a book in his hand (I bet you thought I was going to say ‘bullet in his head’, but that would be illegal and I would never say such a thing…though I understand that others might willingly voice such dire sentiments, thinking they had good reason to do so.) and make him read it. 

Perhaps Chrump meant 25 million years ago.  Either way, it would be advisable for Mr. Chrump to go fuck himself.  That is after all, hopefully, not that I really care, the closest he is likely to get to doing it to Ivanka.  Assuming he has not already done so.

I. Mangrey recoiling.