Going Native

Navajo Vote Talkers

November 21, 2020

Sitting in for Ted Koppel – I. Mangrey

Americans continue to die at record rates. The Chrumpvirus continues its onslaught as IMPEACHED Fake president Chrump maintains radio silence. Der Furor has not done a moment’s work since Election Day. He is a beaten, pathetic loser awaiting countless indictments and court appearances for everything from sexual assault to rape, to tax fraud, to insurance fraud, to campaign finance infractions, and if there is any justice in this world – a bevy of federal crimes and treason.

Despite the thrashing Chrump received on November 3^rd – November 8^th, his mindless minions insist the loss was fake news and that Biden only crushed their beloved bonehead due to rampant voter fraud. Forget the fact that systemic voter fraud, which has been studied, investigated and quantified for decades, has been conclusively proven not to exist. Forget the fact that most of the voter fraud that has been discovered has been perpetrated by Republican’t voters. And forget the fact that Republican’ts have been engaged in relentless, systematic and depressingly successful disenfranchisement of black voters since the drafting of the United States Constitution.

Even though Chrump himself knows (though he has yet to admit so in public) that his days as IMPEACHED Fake president are numbered (60½ to be exact), he has so thoroughly convinced his dangerously demented and devoted delusionists – whose combined IQ barely totals triple digits – that the election was a hoax, that they will never be dissuaded from their double-down delusion no matter what anyone, including Chrump, says until the end of time.

As proof, loyal Chrumpers have been leveling death threats against a number of election officials and politicians in attempts to intimidate them into changing legitimate election results. Sen. Lindsey Graham has not threatened anyone’s life (as far as we know) as if anyone could ever feel threatened by the lily-livered weasel, but he did approach election officials in at least three battleground states suggesting that they throw out thousands of legally cast ballots.

Back in the real world, Joe Biden won by a historic landslide against an incumbent, albeit incorrigible, incongruous, incompetent, president. Biden won states like Georgia and Arizona that have been under Republican’t control for decades. Biden also flipped states like Michigan, Wisconsin and Pennsylvania, which apparently suffered statewide strokes in 2016, leading to Chrump’s stunning Electoral College victory, which once again* thwarted the will of the actual electorate, installing another Republican’t candidate as president despite losing the popular vote.

Biden’s victory was made possible by a surprising voting bloc. Once again, America’s First People, specifically members of the Navajo Nation, have been instrumental in saving the United States from imminent danger. During World War II, Navajo Code Talkers were able to safely transmit vital top-secret military information. By creating a code based on their native tongue, critical strategic communications were able to elude decoding by our enemies.

The record turnout of Navajo voters went overwhelmingly for Biden – 83% to 17% and was largely responsible for Biden’s margin of victory in Arizona. The Navajo Nation helped deliver another important message during the 2020 presidential election. This message was no secret, though no less crucial to the protection and survival of American democracy: Fuck you Donald Chrump!

Chrump regales surviving Navajo Code Talkers with racial slur at White House visit

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*Only partially true since George W. Bush won neither the popular vote nor the Electoral College vote, but was instead appointed president by the Supreme Court after they stopped Florida’s vote counting in the 2000 election.

I. Mangrey calling them the way I see ‘em.