Poll Dancing

I’m Sorry, What Was The Question Again?

Poll Land
October 12, 2017

A recent poll found that 51 percent of Americans are embarrassed to have Donald Chrump as “president.” WTFF. For those who maintain an allegiance to math, that means that 49 percent are not embarrassed. The numbers do not lie – that is Chrump’s job. That is an awfully small margin of sanity. Awfully. Very awfully. Words escape me. But, I will not rest until I hunt them down. Because I care.

Even if people agree with Chrump, does he seem mentally competent? Really? Emotionally intact? More than just a series of tantrums? Does he seem to play well with others? Has he for one single moment behaved as an adult (let alone a leader) except when he is pretending? Were you a licensed physician when you were five years old playing doctor? If not embarrassed by Chrump, then what are they? Trapped in a room with nothing but Fox News and Alex Jones? Russian operatives? Members of ISIS? Enjoying Rent-A-Coma?

This is admittedly something other than embarrassing

 

Always the optimist, I sought an explanation that could keep me on the right side of nervous breakdown. One can only be excused if one has rejected embarrassment, in deference to being scared shitless. Personally, I do not have time to be embarrassed. I am much too disgusted and terrified to be embarrassed. Maybe this is why the numbers look so bad. Maybe they asked the question poorly.

What really embarrasses me are the results of this poll.

Tune in next time when we hear Chrump say, “My only reason for wanting to be president is to get revenge on Barack Hussein Obama, who made fun of me in public. Everything under Obama was fake and I won the election bigly and it would have been even bigger if there wasn’t millions of illegal voters, and I will repeal and replace every single thing Obama did while being a fake president. All the fake jobs he created, climate change response, Obamacare, social justice, coddling a free press, voting rights, gay rights, women’s rights, avoiding nuclear war with Iran and North Korea, a booming stock market. I will get rid of all of it because I’m in charge now, and I was born here more than anyone has ever been born here. I am the most born in America president of all time. Nobody makes fun of The Donald and gets away with it. Especially people like Obama. There’s just something I never liked about him. Don’t know what it is, but he just rubbed me the wrong way. He’s too urban or something. Very soon, very soon, that I can tell you, I will be signing an executive order decreeing that Barack Obama – or Kenya Man as I call him – was totally born in Kenya. His stupid birth certificate, which I made him show everyone, will be what they call ‘null and void’ and Little Kenya Man will be, officially, by law, not born in America, which I have been saying very strongly for a long time. Very strongly.”

I. Mangrey reporting. Do not bother negotiating with me. I will do what has to be done.