Broken News

Manchin's Malarkey Makes Many Mad 

December 20, 2021

It now appears that the Build Back Better legislation, which a huge majority of Americans elected Joe Biden by a wide margin to enact, is all but dead in the water. BBB includes child care support for parents, protected the environment with climate change actions, expanded Medicare, lowered the cost of prescription drugs – like capping insulin at $35 – provided for universal pre-K, and created affordable housing, among many other programs Democrats, including President Joe Biden, ran on.

Most components of this essential package are supported by an even wider margin than the margin by which the guy Biden crushed lost by when he got a minority of the votes and won on a technicality in 2016. And we all know exactly why the bill appears dead. It is thanks to Joe “Coal In Your Stocking Is A GOOD Thing” Manchin and his partner in fuck-poor-and-middle-class-Americans, Kyrsten Sinema. So…

It’s that time again boys and girls. It’s Fuck Joe Manchin (and Kyrsten Sinema) Time. Like a broken clock, Manchin is right twice a day…about the time of day. He is dead and deadly wrong about everything else. One hopes that one day his non-corporate, non-coal constituents will notice that he is doing nothing that is in their best interests, and everything that is in his best interest. Don’t let Manchin’s kindly façade or the homey-houseboat façade on his massive yacht fool you, he is nothing more than a slimy weasel, stuffing his pockets at our expense.

Manchin, speaking to no one in particular, prefers coal to people

Manchin continues to do his best Mitch Fucking McConnell impression by obstructing a Democratic Congress and a Democratic president. Unsurprisingly, Ratpublicans love Joe. Manchin said he just wanted to take enough time to get his colleagues across Grand Canyon-esque aisle to work together to pass legislation. He waited. We waited. We aged. Nothing happened. Manchin insisted that Ratpublicans would come along and do the right thing (something even Manchin himself won’t do) eventually. The Sun will go super nova eventually. Probably before one single Ratpublican – even the very helpful, very concerned Susan Collins – does anything that puts country above party. They are all, especially Manchin, full of, how do you say it…shit. There has been no compromise other than that exhibited by progressives. Fuck Joe Manchin.

Manchin already helped scam progressive Democrats into voting for the “bipartisan” meager infrastructure bill before passing the real infrastructure bill – the one that addresses the current climate catastrophe, and human infrastructure – that he said would get passed. The original demand by progressives was to pass both bills simultaneously, a promise they got from conservaDems. Once progressives finally agreed to trust the process, and their “colleagues” and allowed the first bill to go on its own, they got screwed by Manchin and Sinema.

Sanders recently told MSNBC host Chris Hayes: “I respect other people's points of view, but I do not respect the arrogance of any member of the senate who says, ‘You know what? I'm going to torpedo this entire bill, supported overwhelmingly by the American people’ You've got two people saying, ‘You know what? Hey, if you don't do it my way - I don't care what the president wants, I don't care what 48 of my colleagues want - it's my way or the highway.’ And that, I regard as arrogance.”

I’m as full of shit as hell and I’m not going to fake this anymore

Arrogance? Assholery? All Of The Above?

Manchin recently went on the insurrectionists’ favorite, Fux News – where all Ratpublicans go for succor and uncritical thinking, and where truth is a four-letter word (This is literally true; most Fux viewers think truth has four letters.) – to explain that he will not support Biden’s signature legislation. and said, “I cannot vote to continue with this piece of legislation. If I can’t go home and explain it to the people of West Virginia I can’t vote for it.” I believe he meant, if he can’t go home and explain it without lying about it.

Naturally, Manchin ran to Fux where a large and aggressively disinformed audience tunes in to hear the worst of the Ratpublican insurrectionists lie about one thing or another. Manchin fit right in, telling the gullible millions, “I've done everything humanly possible.” I have no doubt that he agonized over exactly when to place the knife between his “fellow Democrats’” shoulder blades. And he came up with Christmas Eve.

Old King Coal gave the White House only 30 minutes warning that he was taking a shit on the Democrats and America. Then he refused to return a phone call from the White House before waving his coal-fired pecker around on Fux.

“I mean come on, if I voted for this bill, what would my wealthy donors think of me?

And I’m heavily invested in dirty, deadly coal mines for goodness sake.”

Despite Manchin’s home state of West Virginia having 20 percent of their children living in poverty (7^th highest in the nation), Joe remains steadfast in his opposition to continuing the Child Tax Credit, which has already lifted millions of children out of devastating poverty.

A quarter of West Virginians 65 and older have no natural teeth, the highest rate of any state. Naturally, Jo(k)e opposes a plan to give seniors dental coverage as part of Medicare. Silly, I know. It’s not like teeth are important, or part of the body, or if not cared for can kill you.

Ari Berman of Mother Jones

To be fair, he’s not against everything. He supports coal. Fuck Joe Manchin.

However, let us not forget than not one single fucking Ratpublican will vote for legislation that does not heavily favor Wall Street and the bloated military. Not one.

This has been a Paying Attention™ Special Broken News report.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled Fuck Joe Manchin.