Is your brain bruised?
From the really terrific people who brought you Votegra for
Electile Dysfunction…
It’s not a drug, it’s a way of life. Sure there’s a pill to
get you in the mood, but why call it a drug? That would be so pre-Chrump. SAD.
Be the first on your block to avoid the ravages, indignities
and brutal fascism of the Chrump Regime.
Are
your emotions frazzled?
Would you like to simply check out for a few years and
wake up fresh as a daisy?
Would
you like to do it safely without risking damage to your vital organs and
precious bodily fluids? Does this even matter anymore?
Does your psyche suck?
Finally
there is a way to protect your mind – if nothing else – from Chrumpelstiltskin
What you need is
Rent-A-Coma
Rent-A-Coma
Doesn’t this sound appealing?
Doesn’t this look peaceful?
It isn’t suicide. It isn’t moving to Canada. It’s just a time-out. The massive hospital
expenses will be partially offset by the great savings you’ll realize on food,
travel, shelter, Christmas and birthday gifts and all the other things you
waste money on every day, trying to distract yourself from the fascist
destruction of Amerika by the Russian agent known as Chrumputin. Plus, most if
not none of it will be covered by whatever the fuck Republican’ts are
pretending will replace Obamacare.
Don’t get stuck in alt-reality without a viable exit strategy.
Our state-of-the-art resting facilities are in full
compliance with all current regulations. Our promise to you is that when these
regulations, as all regulations, are rescinded at one past midnight on January 21, 2017 we will
maintain the highest standards required by law…when there was law.
CAUTION: The desire to remain comatose may be habit forming
Here’s what people are saying about Rent-A-Coma:
HRC from New York: “ ”
SJG from Pennsylvania: “
!”
RFG from Maryland: “zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz”
Buy yours today or tomorrow, but don’t wait too
long. If you are forced to endure the next four years without Rent-A-Coma
you are likely to be conscious and very, very sorry. At best. Act now – supplies
are limited. Don’t be the last one left standing.
Call right now: 800-NOT-HERE
Operators are standing by, well maybe not standing…
possibly not even conscious.
Operators are standing by, well maybe not standing…
possibly not even conscious.
BRAIN HURTS, MR. GUMBY!
ReplyDeleteI'll take two, don't bother wrapping them.
ReplyDelete