A Fox in Every Hen House

Fifty Shades of Chrump

December 2, 2016

Presidential Chrump

 

“At the right time, I will be so presidential you will be so bored,” Trump assured us back in April, when the notion seemed fanciful. “I know when to be presidential.” What he seems not to know is anything about democracy, law, or any part of the Constitution other than the last 13 words of the Second Amendment – or Two Amendment as he calls it. According to John Cleese, “It looks as though Trump is assembling the crew for a pirate ship,” as most of Amerika can only look on with horror as opposed to November 8^th when most of America looked on with stupid and managed to give Cap’n Chrump an Electoral College victory.

Almost every single person Chrump has nominated or appointed for positions in his administration seems like the worst possible choice for their respective posts. Chrump’s motto is clearly “A fox in every hen house.”

Free-Floating Fascist Fucks

         Reince Priebus/Chief of Staff – weasly wimp and party hack who will unsuccessfully attempt to keep Chrump from being a complete whack-job, but will be beaten to a pulp (at least figuratively) by Stephen Bannon. (ßclick here, scroll down if you dare)

Tom Price/Health and Human Services – wants to gut Medicare, Medicaid, etc., kill Planned Parenthood (thinks employers should be allowed to fire women who use birth control or had an abortion) and kill Obama care – he crafted legislation to kill it over 60 times – what’s the definition of insanity again?

          Jefferson Beauregaurd Sessions III/Attorney General – racist prick, hates voting rights, prosecuted African Americans for voting, opposes all immigration, and is a climate denier

          Betsy DeVos/Education – another billionaire who wants to rid the world of public schools and refused to pay her local school taxes, has zero experience in the classroom, sister of mercenary company Blackwater CEO Erik Prince

          Michael Flynn/National Security Advisor – “Fear of Muslims is RATIONAL.” Crazed liar and hate monger – great fit for FPOTUS Chrump; more on this flaming asshole later

KT McFarland/Deputy National Security Advisor – ex-Fux News mouthpiece who outed her gay brother to their parents while he was dying of HIV/AIDS

          Nikki Haley/Ambassador to UN – Clueless, with zero foreign policy experience, likely brought in to show Chrump can hire a woman who won’t mind having her pussy grabbed by FPOTUS; this could have been much worse: John Bolton for example.

          Elaine Chao/Transportation - labor secretary under George W. Bush, married to Mitch Fucking McConnell

          Steve Mnuchin/Treasury – billionaire, ex-Goldman Sachs denizen, hedge fund manager, whose operation was known as a foreclosure machine, tossing some 35,000 homeowners out into the streets while making a fortune for himself – Chrump’s former finance chief put in charge of our treasury by the guy who railed against Hillary Clinton for getting paid to give speeches to Mnuchin et al.

And his latest…

          Gen. James “Mad Dog” Mattis/Secretary of Defense – obviously selected on the strength of his nickname, which Chrump loves

Where does he find these people? FPresident-Elect Chrump was spotted in Central Park between 2:00 and 4:00 in the morning consulting with several homeless individuals, apparently seeking their advice on filling cabinet posts. Chump likes the homeless because like him they often consult with themselves on important matters. We are still waiting for their suggestions to be tweeted into the public record. You might be a member of the Chrump administration and not even know it.

Although most of the discussions could not be heard, one witness heard Chrump repeatedly yelling, “I won the popular vote! I won the popular vote!” to no one in particular.

“Millions of people voted for Hillary Clinton illegally.
I saw them dancing in the streets.”

 

Chrump promised he would “drain the swamp”. Another example of the man with the best words not having the slightest clue what any of them mean. Not ‘drain’, not ‘swamp’ not ‘the’. Or, could it be that he has just been lying the whole time and he is a greedy, narcissistic conman and improperly sedated mental patient?

So far, so Chrump.

I. Mangrey and N. Schock reporting. Jane, stop this crazy thing.
                                                                                                    Mad in USA